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Learning to love God Again

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Ninny:
Angie,
 I was "Churched" my whole life from the time I was born until I found BT!! That was a LONG LONG journey!! I remember growing up my dad and mom worked around the clock with few days off so they didn't attend church regularly, but the preacher of the local Nazarene church came by our house all the time! My brothers and I attended that church all of our lives until we were teenagers! The pastor never seemed to really be looking for anything or trying real hard to get my parents to go to church...BUT every time he came my dad would open our freezer and send him home with his arms loaded down with food! Whatever we had my dad freely shared!  :o

I remember one day the pastor's wife, she was my Sunday School teacher, was talking about the Catholic church down the road. She said, "Well we don't really consider them to be Christians." I remember thinking to myself, "Well, what are they then, they're not Buddhists!" That was one of my first encounters with the real "Christian" spirit! That is one of my earliest realizations that there was something "rotten in Denmark" as the saying goes! It took my whole life long to really hear God's call on my life. I was certain for many years that I was called to be a teacher and I'm a darned good one, too! I taught Bible to children from the time I was 16 years old until just the last few years. BUT in that time of thinking that I knew my direction in life CLEARLY...there were undercurrents of unbelief and doubt starting to settle in and that was what God was doing in me! I really miss the kids and the way it used to feel when I was teaching, but guess what? After I had read a few of Ray's papers, and began to understand the depth of the deception, I no longer wanted to teach the kids! I did NOT want to teach what I no longer believed!!
So I was left with the question, "What am I supposed to do now?" It is almost like the question I would ask or the way I would feel if after over 37 years of marriage my husband suddenly decided to divorce me!

So no one is alone in this journey here at Bible-Truths I assure you! Angie, and NB don't forget that it has happened to all of us! We are together in this until God says differently! We are in some ways like a rag tag army trudging up a hill not knowing what we will find when we get to the top! We do know though that God is with us all the way! And we know the victory is ours!!! ;D ;D :D And Amen,  Marlene!!
Kathy ;D

lilitalienboi16:
Hey... i thought i knew God 5 years ago.. than i met ray and this site and truly thought i knew God. I've come to realize as of recent that i am still very carnel and yet still a beast, never truly loving God... So here i am, i'm learning, for the third time now, to love God.

Good to see i'm not alone :)

Guess it's a life long journey and for some of us, we're only just beginning. I can only hope and pray that God has something grand for me, more than just an ordinary carnal selfish life. I want Christ, i want to live like He would, i want Him to live in me everyday and always.

I wanna sit on those thrones with you guys one day :)

Much love in our Savior,

Alex

firefly77:
Ninny,
I really liked your analogy with your husband divorcing you after 37 years. It is like having been married to someone who has deceived you for so many years while you were absolutely clueless because you trusted him.
It has been a painful journey since I left Babylon although what we have here is so much better. Everything that needed to be shaken was shaken; there is only one foundation left and that is Christ.
It is sorta strange, I would much rather hang out now with a bunch of unbelievers than have a relationship with a so called "Christian".
I don't want to hijack this topic, so I will leave it at that.
Yes, Alex, it is nice to know you are not alone. However, I am no material for sitting on one of the thrones some day unless God does a major overhaul in me. I can see the "beast", I live with her day in and day out... it is not a pretty sight.

May Christ fill our hearts with His Love.

Marlene:
Well, I believe we are all in the same boat. We have to die daily.
Philippians Chapter 3  verse 12 Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus
verse 13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended; but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
verse 14 I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus

We have to grow and endure to the end. Not, one of us can make the claim we are the elect. We, are in a race for the prize. We will find that out after we awake from death.

In His Love,
Marlene

aqrinc:

We must endure to the end, to gain the prize of Election, and GOD Knows All who will endure. Thus here we go again:

Php 2: 9-16 (CLV)
9 Wherefore, also, God highly exalts Him, and graces Him with the name that is above every name,
10 that in the name of Jesus every knee should be bowing, celestial and terrestrial and subterranean,
11 and every tongue should be acclaiming that Jesus Christ is Lord, for the glory of God, the Father."
12 So that, my beloved, according as you always obey, not as in my presence only, but now much rather in my absence, with fear and trembling, be carrying your own salvation into effect,
13 for it is God Who is operating in you to will as well as to work for the sake of His delight.
14 All be doing without murmurings and reasonings,
15 that you may become blameless and artless, children of God, flawless, in the midst of a generation crooked and perverse among whom you are appearing as luminaries in the world,
16 having on the word of life, for my glorying in the day of Christ, that I did not run for naught, neither that I toil for naught."

george :).

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