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I have a confession
Roy Martin:
Good morning Marques,
I still think you misunderstand what I was trying to convey. It could be that I'm not understanding what Ray and scripture says about God causes everything.
I'll use an example of God draws us to Him. I was lost beyond description when I cried out to God, but before this, I thought I was on top of the world with all the money and marijuana, cars and home with 140 acres of the most beautiful land around. A beautiful wife. Everyone I knew thought I was the Kingpin. It felt good, but I didn't believe in God. Like a tornado over night it all began to crumble. Within two years it was all gone, everything even the wife. I started calling out to God and the next thing I know is I'm going to church. This is where God called me to, to a place that Ray teaches to be a place of lies and deceit. I felt safe there, but after months of crying out to God to take away my pain, the only thing I was getting was more and more pain. The next thing I know is I'm trying methamphetamine, a drug I had always hated with a passion. Wow! I thought, this stuff feels good. It numbs my pain. I turned from God to a drug, but God remained in my head. I couldn't get rid of Him. Its like I wanted to, but couldn't. I knew without a doubt that something very supernatural was going on. I could see it as the material things started to disappear. It was a nightmare I couldn't wake up from. Well I go back to church for awhile and then back out to the drugs, but each time I went back to the drugs I would be asking, why am I doing this, I hate this. Sometime within this one years time as I was driving to get drugs,I looked up to the most beautiful sunset and said thank you God for that beautiful sunset. At that very second in a blink of an eye God spoke to me and said, "this is what you have been asking for, and this is what is waiting for you." Simultaneously all the pain was sucked out of me and filled with a joy and peace that just couldn't be anything of this world. I can't even come close to describing it. I went on to the drug house shouting what had just happened, but within 20 minutes it faded as quick as it came. I was filled again with even more pain than before and did some drugs.This went off and on for 2 years until I'm about to be sentenced to prison. The pain never did seize. The only thing that got me through each day was the thought that today I'm going to kill myself but I didn't have a gun and still didn't have the strength to do it. I'm a few days of going to prison. I wake up with the mother load of pain that told me its time to die, I can do this now but still I didn't have a gun. I decided to go for a walk in the woods and just as I reached the edge of the woods just 50 yards from my sisters house, I saw a rifle sitting against a fence in the thicket. I look around and call out to see if anyone one is around. I see that the gun has rust and has been there for awhile. I take it home , clean it up and put bullets in it and shot it several times. It worked perfectly. I wrote a letter to my loved ones explaining the pain and that I had no choice but to end my life, and I started walking toward the woods to kill myself . The next thing I know is I'm at the church crying and sobbing to the pastor unable to even speak. All I can do is hand him the letter I wrote. He read it and said is this really what you want and I said yes,I have no choice. As he started to pray God did it again, He sucked all that pain out of me and gave me the strength to face what was ahead of me. I went to prison and got closer to God than ever before.I was there for 3 years and came home on fire for God, back in church, doing everything that seemed right but I started getting sad and lonely and again I'm back to the world and drugs. I'm crying out to God, why God am I here, please take me from this. On and on this went. I packed up my car and moved out of State trying to run from this life and God. I was gone one year and back to the church seeking God like never before. Within two months of being back, I was praying something about failing,and God let me know that each time that I thought I was falling away,He was closing doors on desires and pain and confusion, giving me strength and faith. So you see, it was God that lead me to Him by my falling away. Each time I thought I was falling from God; I hated more and more that life. Closing doors, making me right.
No one can say that God didn't cause all of these things to happen the way they did. Jesus said that the words He spoke are spirit and give life. Those words are scripture that was life in the working in my testimony. Its my testimony that God gave to me. There are many living scriptures in my story that gave me life.
You are right Marques that we can't separate scripture and a walk with God. I was trying to show that we have to have both, and that they are in harmony with each other. Some have a hard time understanding scripture but can relate to my testimony or their own because it is scripture in real life rather than just words not understood. All was and is of God. God causes all things. It all lead me to want God in my life more than wanting my pain to go away, more than anything physical, more than anything of this world. That's where God lead me in my walk with Him. I still fall short of this but here I am writing this, and I have no pain or sorrow, no drugs for 5 years, A nice 2 story home, a new pickup truck, a new God loving woman, secure finances, but not plenty, and most importantly is God is with me leading the way giving life to His words.
Thank you Marques for your concern and desire to keep things straight according to scripture. I do hope that I haven't confused anyone, but this is my story that was a trial beyond description and I give God the glory.
Peace and love
Roy
PS; What are the odds of wanting a gun to kill yourself and find one 5-10 minutes later leaning on a fence in the woods?
EKnight:
--- Quote ---No man can serve 2 masters...NO MAN [OR WOMAN]. You cannot serve God and YOURSELF at the same time!
--- End quote ---
Marques,
I understand this. It is in the letting go of ourselves that makes us more like Christ. The distractions of this world can lead us astray but it is up to God to brings us back on the path to righteousness. I am waiting for the Spirit to move me in this direction, hence the prayer request.
I think I understand what you are saying Roy. It is in the "experience" of the "Word" that we recognize God's handiwork. It's always in retrospect that we can see God's plan if we are fortunate enough to see it at all.
Correct me if I am wrong on these points.
Eileen
Marlene:
I agree with Marques that we do need to know the scriptures. But, we can know the scriptures and still not heed them. Yes, that old man or woman must be killed. It is not an easy battle. That, is what I want more then anything. Yes, I know we play games with ourself. Most don't like looking that beast in the face. Most, don't think they are really that bad. I also, agree with Roy that our experiences teach us. Both, are needed as I believe all are from God.
I have to say this post has been good for me. I have been out there and not able to read the Bible alot cause of all the trials. But, last night God made me pick that Bible up. He choose James. These scriptures spoke volumes to me.
James Chapter 1 verse 22 But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.
23 For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass.
24For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straight way forgetteth what manner of man he was
25 But whoso looketh into the perfect law of liberty, and coninueth therein, he being not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work,
this man shall be blessed in his deed.
Marques is showing us how important the scriptures are to us. Now, the heeding them is often taught to us by our experiences.
There are all kinds of lesson to be learned in the Bible. Man and woman has not changed over the generations. I know many people who read the Bible and never heed the word. Only, God can change us.
I love you all and get alot from your posts. I only wish I could have known scriptures as well as many of you. But, God has always got my conscience through out the years. I don't care if all will be saved. I Love God and just want to please him. I hate being a hypocrite. Yes, God knows me and I am glad. He never ceases to show me the beast.
In His Love,
Marlene
mharrell08:
--- Quote from: EKnight on October 11, 2009, 03:09:00 PM ---Marques,
I understand this. It is in the letting go of ourselves that makes us more like Christ. The distractions of this world can lead us astray but it is up to God to brings us back on the path to righteousness. I am waiting for the Spirit to move me in this direction, hence the prayer request.
--- End quote ---
I don't like to keep harping on a subject so I'll try to be very clear:
My comments were not directed towards your original post...it was based on the responses you received.
Too many times, even in other parts of the forum, we'd rather say something that 'feels good' compared to the uncomfortable truth.
When someone is falling away from the things of God, we should encourage one another to return to Him. Whether with a gentle hand (Jude 1:22) or with strong admonition (Jude 1:23), let all be done to the glory of God giving no place to the flesh. Saying, 'He has you right where He wants you' is not encouraging one to 'overcome the world' [1 John 5:4]. That only encourages one to be comfortable in their carnality.
Just because the Son of Man came to save that which is destroyed, does not mean we encourage one another to continue down a path of spiritual destruction. All roads DO NOT lead to the same place. A person is only fooling themselves in thinking they can ignore His Word but still 'walk with God'. The two are as contrary as night and day.
So again Eileen, I did not see that being done FOR YOU in the immediate responses (though not all).
Hope you understand,
Marques
Roy Martin:
Mark posted this on another thread, but seems appropriate here.
GWT
1 Corinthians 12
1 Brothers and sisters, I don't want there to be any misunderstanding concerning spiritual gifts. 2 You know that when you were unbelievers, every time you were led to worship false gods you were worshiping gods who couldn't even speak. 3 So I want you to know that no one speaking by God's Spirit says, "Jesus is cursed." No one can say, "Jesus is Lord," except by the Holy Spirit.
4 There are different spiritual gifts, but the same Spirit gives them. 5 There are different ways of serving, and yet the same Lord is served. 6 There are different types of work to do, but the same God produces every gift in every person. 7 The evidence of the Spirit's presence is given to each person for the common good of everyone. 8 The Spirit gives one person the ability to speak with wisdom. The same Spirit gives another person the ability to speak with knowledge. 9 To another person the same Spirit gives courageous faith. To another person the same Spirit gives the ability to heal. 10 Another can work miracles. Another can speak what God has revealed. Another can tell the difference between spirits. Another can speak in different kinds of languages. Another can interpret languages. 11 There is only one Spirit who does all these things by giving what God wants to give to each person.
12 For example, the body is one unit and yet has many parts. As all the parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 By one Spirit we were all baptized into one body. Whether we are Jewish or Greek, slave or free, God gave all of us one Spirit to drink.
14 As you know, the human body is not made up of only one part, but of many parts. 15 Suppose a foot says, "I'm not a hand, so I'm not part of the body!" Would that mean it's no longer part of the body? 16 Or suppose an ear says, "I'm not an eye, so I'm not a part of the body!" Would that mean it's no longer part of the body? 17 If the whole body were an eye, how could it hear? If the whole body were an ear, how could it smell? 18 So God put each and every part of the body together as he wanted it. 19 How could it be a body if it only had one part? 20 So there are many parts but one body. 21 An eye can't say to a hand, "I don't need you!" Or again, the head can't say to the feet, "I don't need you!" 22 The opposite is true. The parts of the body that we think are weaker are the ones we really need. 23 The parts of the body that we think are less honorable are the ones we give special honor. So our unpresentable parts are made more presentable. 24 However, our presentable parts don't need this kind of treatment. God has put the body together and given special honor to the part that doesn't have it. 25 God's purpose was that the body should not be divided but rather that all of its parts should feel the same concern for each other. 26 If one part of the body suffers, all the other parts share its suffering. If one part is praised, all the others share in its happiness.
27 You are Christ's body and each of you is an individual part of it. 28 In the church God has appointed first apostles, next prophets, third teachers, then those who perform miracles, then those who have the gift of healing, then those who help others, those who are managers, and those who can speak in a number of languages. 29 Not all believers are apostles, are they? Are all of them prophets? Do all of them teach? Do all of them perform miracles 30 or have gifts of healing? Can all of them speak in other languages or interpret languages? 31 You only want the better gifts, but I will show you the best thing to do.
Roy
PS. At first I was offended by Marques reply, but I kept trying to see his point and where I made a mistake and finally I realizes that it was in my wording. I am like Marques, I don't like to keep harping on a topic, but I think I should clear things up. My experiences, journeys and paths all lead me closer to God.They were my journeys and walks that seems to be in harmony with Gods word. Mine and only mine do I speak from. Each one has his or hers own journeys, experiences, paths and trials. I don't know where anyone is going to be lead by my experiences which I gave you in a testimony of how God worked in me. I am in error by saying it is for everyone.
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