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Author Topic: Rays sense of humor...  (Read 30097 times)

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AK4

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #20 on: November 03, 2009, 03:28:09 PM »

Heres one

"They (Christians) cant walk and chew gum at the same time.....spiritually!

How true it is

Anthony
« Last Edit: November 03, 2009, 04:17:41 PM by AK4 »
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Samson

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #21 on: November 03, 2009, 11:37:25 PM »

Here's one I just retrieved from the EMail to Ray Archives where he calls this individual, A LYING TWO FACED HYPOCRITE, see below in blue print.


Liar
« on: May 29, 2006, 08:49:15 AM » 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I challenge you to read my first e-mail several times, and then repley. Think about what I said very carefuly. You say that you seek the truth, if that is so then think very carefuly over it. Comprehend what I am saying. Then decide whether to go to Jesus saying "I have sinned." or come to me to debate. Both of us are gracious to repented sinners. Not so, to those who refuse.

 
Scott, here is your first email to me and my comment to it:
 

Dear Scott:
I want to make a comment and ask a question regarding your email. I belive that you are not being honest.  See my comment before after your comment.....
 

    I hope that you are either prepaed to have your eyes opened. Or, meet your Maker. I challege your blindness to the existance of God as One, Yet Three. If I shine light into your eyes, repent, and come to Jesus, saying, "I have sinned. I grant you that the word Trinity, is not found in the scripture. However The existatance of God in Three, Is a fact. You stated that the so-called Trinity was not logical. You are right. It is not logical; at first. However it can become logical. It does not matter whether or not you understand. God's existance does not change, just because Ray Smith does not understand it. I could help Mr. Smith to understand it, if you were willing receive light when light is shinned. But, if I shine light, and you flea from light, your course is set. Do not flea the Light, come to the Light. If I give you understanding, will you receive it? I can make what seems to be illogical, become logical. Can you receive it? I would like to give you a few simple illustrations to open your understanding. Afterwards the Scriptures fall into place. You say that three in one is illogical. At first maybe. Can you use your imagination. Imagine- three links in a chain. Think about that for a momment, before you go farther. I would like to ask a simple question. How many links are in that chain? The answer is, "Three". I would like to ask another question; How many chains is it? the answer is of course, "One". There is one chain, and three links. I want you to give thought to that for a moment. One chain with three links in it. A chain made of  steel, or plastic. Picture that in your mind. One chain, three links. God exist in a chain made of the Spirit of God. Each link being the same Eternal, Omnisience God. If you were speaking to One, or the Other, you are speaking to the Same. The First being in heave. the Second come forth. The Third, in man (If he is born again.) The First in the "true tabernacle in heave n, which God hath pitched, and not man" Holy (seperated, set apart). The second, come forth as mediator. Who walk with adam in the garden, and appeared to the saints. Who appeared to Moses on the mount, spoken of in the second person, "And the Angel of the Lord appeared unto Moses in a flame of fire out of the nidst of the bush... ...., ... Moreover he said, I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isac and the God of Jacob..." Ex. 2 it was the second "So-call" person of God who appeared to the saint. It was He who it was prophecied would be born into the human race. "and hie name shall be called Emmanuel, which is being inturpted, God with us."
   
 
    COMMENT:  Look at your next statement here:
     

    For two thausand years "WE" have been calling Him Emmanuel, "God with us" and you have called the word of God a lier.
   
 
    COMMENT:  How is it that you state: "...you [that's me] have called the word of God a lier [liar]"?  Where have I done that? HOw have I done that? Where is your proof of that statement? Show me.  Quote me.  In reference to Jesus being Emmanuel, how have I made God's word a  lie?  I await your reply.......................
    Ray
   
 
    Here Scott is your weasel word reply:
     
    My comment "We" was intentend to be a general term meaning those of us who believe in the Deity of Christ(and the Trinity). "You" was intended to mean those of you who do not believe in the Deity of Christ. God's Word does reveal that to be the truth,  whether a man understands and believes it or not. I hope that I caused you to give this some thought. God is gracious to those come to Him, saying, "I have sinned." Find a strong(not a weak) conservative Baptist church. Thank you for writing back,
Scott
 
   
    So Scott, the "you" [that's me] that you address in your fourth or fifth email now, is not "me?"  Just a "general" you?  And now (after trying to teach me the plan of salvation in numerous emails and literally "CHALLENGE" me), you suggest that if I answer your "challange," then I am a "debater" and fall from YOUR'S AND CHRIST'S grace.
     
    You lying, two-faced hypocrite, Scott.  YOU challenged me, and I asked to to provide proof of your slanderous accusations, and you provided NONE. You got caught with your pants down in your attempt to ridicule my paper. You couldn't find a "quote" where I "called God's word a LIAR."  But being the spiritual coward that you are, you now attempt to bully me into accepting your pagan doctrines.
     
    Furthermore, Scott, you didn't even read my paper on the Trinity, did you?  So I "deny the divinity of Jesus" do I?  And just where do I do that?  Where?  Show me where I do that in my paper?  You can't, you lying weasel, becuase there is no such thing in my Trinity paper.  But let me show you what IS IN my paper:
     
    In my paper "GOD IS NOT A TRINITY" page 22 under the caption: "WHO AND WHAT IS JUSUS CHRIST?"  you will read the following:
     
    Paragraph 3:  "Is Christ God?  YES HE IS"
     
    Paragraph 4:  "Is Christ worthy of worship?  YES HE IS!"
     
    Paragraph 5:  "So Christ is called 'God'"
     
    Paragraph 6:  "Jesus IS God!"
     
    Etc.
     
    It is YOU, Scott, who had better be thinking about bitterly repenting of your lies, hypocrisy, and slander.
    Sincerely,
    Ray
 
« Last Edit: January 14, 2007, 03:30:58 PM by Kat »  Report to moderator    Logged 
 
 
 
 
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I thought that was pretty good and appropriate in this guy's case.

                         Kind Regards, Samson.
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cjwood

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #22 on: November 04, 2009, 02:05:56 AM »

 Debate?
« on: July 18, 2006, 08:29:47 AM » 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ray,
 
Mr. Smith you surely do get to the point, and it seems you do it very well...
  Do you know of Farrell Till?   I would love to see this man attack you the way he does some others, I am asking YOU if there would be a chance of you DEBATING him? He seems to like to make people look small. Mr. Till used to be a preacher, now he is just a moron.(OPPS) How does one go from believing in something to being an atheist?  Even after He did not believe He continued to preach for money. :o By the way Ray, I asked you  because He is one of those well educated men, and me thinks you could give him an education.
Smiles and thanks,
Michael


Dear Michael:
I would rather sit on mound of fire ants than debate this guy!     :D :D :D :D

God be with you,
'Ray
 


isn't this one just great?!
our brother ray most definitely has a way with words.

claudia
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jeetkunejimi

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #23 on: November 04, 2009, 08:34:49 AM »

This is not so much funny ha! ha! but rather scathing sarcasm, but that's me, I love scathing sarcasm, it's funnay ha! ha! to me:).


"What prompted this letter was your statement that: "Greek is the most exact language on the face of the earth," followed by the statement that Christ is going to reign "for ever and for ever and for ever ... " In the English, this statement is contradictory and redundant, and in the Greek it has no equivalent. If "for ever" means "always" or "eternity," what pray does "and for ever" mean? Is that something like whiter than white? It is not I who find fault with that statement, but God."


I would have been tempted to have added, Dr Hagee were you once a ROCKET SCIENTIST?
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cjwood

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #24 on: November 04, 2009, 10:33:08 PM »

Ray; Does a cat have a tail?
I did a couple of searches but could not find a specific quote, but found some very interested reading non the less.
Peace,   Bluzman



hey bluz,
this might be the quote reference you were thinking about.

claudia

 Re: The 'mark' of the beast?
« Reply #4 on: Today at 06:24:59 PM » Quote 

From 'What Happened to the Church Jesus Built?' @ http://bible-truths.com/lake8.html

...Make no mistake about it:

    "For the love of money is the [Gk. ‘a’] root of all evil" (I Tim. 6:10).

Before the Reformation, it was thought by some that one could practically "buy" one’s salvation.

Jesus "CAST OUT them that sold and bought in the temple." Is there, "buying and selling" going on in the Church today? Excuse me…does a cat have a tail?...
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aqrinc

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #25 on: November 05, 2009, 02:08:41 AM »


This is a lesson and also a great Rayism.
from: http://bible-truths.com/email15.htm#impress

Most of your questions are silly and demeaning. "Are you [that's me] a Saul or a Paul?"  What kind of question is that?  "Do you destroy or build up the body of Christ?"  Do you really expect me to say that "I DESTROY the body of Christ?" Do you?  Well then why ask such a demeaning and stupid question?

How many sinners have I lead to Jesus? NONE! And neither have you:  "NO MAN C-A-N come to Me[Jesus] except the FATHER [the 'FATHER'--not YOU and not ME, but 'THE FATHER'!!!] which has sent Me draw him  [Greek: 'DRAG him']:  and I will raise him up at the last day" (John 6:44 & 65).  We don't bring sinners to Christ, GOD THE FATHER DOES. Read your Bible, and stop being so 'holier-than-thou."
God be with you,

Ray

george.

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cjwood

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #26 on: November 05, 2009, 03:30:34 AM »

 Rebuilding the Temple
« on: July 12, 2006, 10:07:15 AM » 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Hi Ray,
>
> It's been awhile since my last email. I just recently heard again for
> the umpteenth time (over the past 25 years) an end time teaching
> regarding the rebuilding and restoration of the temple and temple
> worship in Jerusalem. >
> is there a possibility of the rebuilding & restoration of the temple in this
> generation?
>
> Thanks,
>
> Jere


Dear Jere:

With some few exceptions, my take is this:  "If the Christian Church teaches it, it is Unscriptural."


God be with you, Ray


i think i have read this or heard this one at least a gazillion times too.   :D :D

really staying prayerful for ray's ability to physically set thru the time required for the conference.  and staying hopeful that our Father God will be merciful to ray, and to all who seek the Truths of the Gospel.

claudia
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Marky Mark

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #27 on: November 08, 2009, 12:03:33 PM »

So nice to see Ray in form  ;D

Quote
Ray!!! What are you doing? You name names!   DUH!!!


2009 Mobile Conference
http://bible-truths.com/video/Conference2009_1.wmv


Thanks Ray...


Mark



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Patrick

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #28 on: November 09, 2009, 04:38:50 PM »

Learned a new word while listening to one of Ray's audio's; flibbertigibbet. Now if I could just remember which audio it was, listened to about 20 hrs of various ones over the weekend.
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cjwood

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #29 on: November 10, 2009, 04:55:48 AM »

i tried searching flibbertigibbet (which you most likely did too), but your comment is the only time that word came up. i went to kat's transcription section, which includes audios, and put in flibbertigibbet in the search box at the top of that page, but nothing other than your comment again.

so, i was of no help at all...but, that word cracks me up!!!    :D :D :D :D :D :D


claudia
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indianabob

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #30 on: November 11, 2009, 04:02:28 PM »

Folks,

Flibbertigibbet is an Middle English word referring to a flighty or whimsical person, usually a young female. In modern use, it is used as a slang term, especially in Yorkshire, for a gossipy or overly talkative person. Its origin is in a meaningless representation of chattering.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flibbertigibbet
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Ninny

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #31 on: November 11, 2009, 04:14:26 PM »

Now that is a good one, there IBob!! heehee!! Thank you for that! I'm glad none of my friends knows that word!! ha!!  :D
Kathy ;)
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Vangie

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #32 on: November 11, 2009, 05:10:35 PM »

I like this one... "twitterpated".  Ray said it at the conference and I giggled out loud.
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jerreye

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #33 on: November 11, 2009, 09:49:50 PM »

I think these are my favorites:

"Hell knows no fury like a Christian being shown the truth"

..."it's TOTAL NONSENSE"

"am I going too fast for anybody?"

"I will now hold my breath......................................."


:)
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Amrhrasach

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #34 on: November 28, 2009, 10:21:16 PM »

Bump.

I try to vision Rays facial expression when he's writing these lines. 

"Now listen carefully. Here is wisdom beyond its years. When a scientist creates an experiment or machine that malfunctions, is he responsible for the malfunction? Yes. Does he hold the experiment or machine responsible? No. Does he hold God responsible? No. Okay.

Now then, according to Christendom, when God creates an experiment or machine that malfunctions, is He responsible for the malfunction? No. Does He hold the experiment or machine responsible? Yes. Does He hold man responsible? Yes. See the wisdom?"

http://bible-truths.com/lake2.html

"Ask a hundred pastors or theologians if your mother, let’s say, were to bow her knees in the name of Jesus [Jehovah-Saviour] Christ and confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, will she be saved? I am pretty sure all one hundred would say, "YES, OF COURSE!" Next ask the same one hundred whether all those in heaven and earth who will also bow and confess Jesus as Lord will be saved, and I am pretty sure all one hundred would say, "NO, OF COURSE NOT!" See the difference? Me neither!"

http://bible-truths.com/lake5.html


Gary


(bold, italics, underline...mine)
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Deborah-Leigh

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #35 on: November 30, 2009, 04:20:11 AM »



 Quoted from "In The Day of the Great Slaughter,"

Try and convince any professing Christian that he "despises" God’s word. You better be ready to run.

Arc
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rockrdude

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #36 on: November 30, 2009, 08:38:19 AM »

Instead of quoting Ray (I'm enjoying the quotes, BTW), I just wanted to let you all know that last night, my wife took out my printouts transcribed from Ray's 2008 conference about Creation & the flood. She's never been too excited about the things Ray has to say (She has little to no trust in Bible teachers). But between the information presented, how he presented it, and his wonderful sense of humor, she was rather enamored with it all.

I pray this continues and that she is drawn to read and study further (I pretty much have everything on this website printed out, except the e-mails to Ray). Thank God for Ray's sense of humor and how it shines through his writings!  :D
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Ninny

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #37 on: November 30, 2009, 11:34:00 AM »

It's kind of interesting that even through his pain, Ray still manages that sense of humor! He has blessed us all and hey, Rockrdude, if your wife is drawn to the teaching because of ray's unique delivery, that would be sweet! He surely has drawn us all with that! I have loved that since the first thing I read on the website.. I started at the top and read my way down!! still do it all the time!!  :D You'd think that over the last 5 years I'd have it all down pat! But it's still refreshing, everytime I read! The favorite line of mine hands down has still got to be..."...I'm holding my breath now...." I love that!! :D
Kathy ;)
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Extol

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #38 on: December 04, 2009, 01:51:27 PM »

My favorites are when he gets angry and/or sarcastic. Like in the "Was Christ Made Sin?" audio:

This is rank heresy!  This is the worst kind of teaching I have ever heard in my life!  This is the bottom of the barrel; this is the dregs, this is dirty religion! 

I also really like the 23 Minutes in Hell audio; he gets quite animated in that one ("ridiculous nonsense", "bizarre garbage", "evil filth", "I don't even know what to think about people who write like this!", "[chuckling] this guy...he really does write like a third-grader!"etc.) And especially this part, reading from the Bill Wiese book:

"[the demon] threw me into the wall, and every bone in my body broke, and I felt pain"--well, duh, I would think so!---"I just began to lie on the floor there"---I just began to lie there? I thought he THREW you there! 'I just began to lie there'. What is that?! If this were a third-grader he'd get a low mark for really bad grammar...'I just began to lie there'. No you didn't begin to lie there, you were thrown there with all your bones broken!   LOL


And of course the two classics already mentioned: "Oh really?" and "Wrong, paleface!"
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Ninny

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Re: Rays sense of humor...
« Reply #39 on: December 04, 2009, 02:08:02 PM »

Ray has such a way with words! And when you get used to his delivery it's even funnier! I have listened to his audios and watched the videos so many times..I always am amused at the way he says things! I'm so glad I got to go to the conference this year! He's a hoot, but he gets his point across!! I wish I could do that!!  :D
Kathy ;)
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