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Looking Behind and Seeing

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Astrapho:
Bunni, I agree completely! Hell is surely not a doctrine of peace or love!!

I've always been asking questions, long before bible-truths. If we have free will, how can God already know everything in advance? If there is a hell, why can't God stop people from going there? Furthermore, God already knows these people will go to hell! And then, I read Revelation. God, to me, was a vengeful sadistic tyrant. And I'd do well to stay on his good side. I never was able to think of Him as a God of love. I mean, all those people are going to hell! Eternal torture in fire!!

There was once where I even asked why we preach if knowledge is what makes people "eligible for hell". I still can't find a satisfactory answer.

The Oneness Pentecostals made it look like they taught the truth, hell, tongues, and all. And what a bleak "truth" it was! I never really felt free, I felt more chains, and burdens at the ends of the chains. And they tell me it was the good news, and "oh, doesn't the truth set you free?". No, it made me self-righteous, holier-than-thou, depressed, and in retrospect, disgusted.

A friend of mine was just telling me about how her classmate passed on (she was our same age...), and she was very shocked and sad. Somehow, we rolled into, "Wonder what hell mongering christians will say when they hear about it."  If I was a pentecostal, I would keep my mouth shut as I would have no words of comfort.  I'll probably be thinking about the horrors of her roasting in hell too much to feel any form of sadness.

In hindsight, I was a totally different person when I was in Babylon. I remember that I didn't want people to go to hell, and therefore I preached (read: forced my beliefs on) to as many people as I could. And I looked at others through different glasses. It's scary. Truly I was (still am) a beast!! If I could erase that whole period of time, I would!  

Ninny:
Astrapho..Do you know why you are a totally different person now than you were back then??
F-R-E-E-D-O-M!!!!!! It's amazing what a little freedom will do to a person's mind!! Some people can't take freedom! Some people thrive in freedom!
I remember when some of the people who came out of the USSR and came to America..they didn't know how to deal with freedom! So they went back to Russia where their lives were more ordered! Remember when the Hebrews left Egypt? They didn't like the freedom! They wanted to be controlled! They didn't want to have to wonder what each day would bring! even though they were slaves some of them just wanted that life back! So those whose eyes have not been opened by God..they'd rather just stay where they are, believing the way they do..what do you do with the freedom from that belief system? Whatever God directs! and if the eyes are NOT opened by God, there is really nothing you can do for them, there is only the knowing that one day they will be free..either in this age or the next! God knows! Why do some of us accept the freedom and some don't? Only God knows the answer to that! But that doesn't excuse us from telling what we know..especially if someone asks! that's how God draws us to the truth..the asking, the questions..that's how we ALL got here!! God has all the answers and when He directs us to the answer..wow!!
So don't be afraid to open your mouth when someone asks you!!  :D
Kathy ;)

cjwood:
bunni,
thanks for your testimony of Truth.  i must admit that personally i don't think i ever thought about hell that much while in babylon, i guess because i just figured that if that is what my church taught, then surely it must be the truth.  BUT, i was wrong, wrong, wrong paleface.  as i have said before, God worked through my agnostic husband to bring me to the Truth about hell.  he asked me the question that would cause me to really think about a God that would send everyone to hell, even if they never had the opportunity to hear about Christ.  his question was "why would i want to believe in a God that was going to destroy millions of people in hell if they were loving, decent people who were raised in a culture that didn't teach about Jesus Christ?"  i remember my pat answer to him of "well, that is what it says in the scriptures". boy oh boy was i blind.  but, my Loving Father was working in my heart and mind, and i didn't even know it.  Praise God for His mercy and grace.  yes bunni, He will finish the work in me which He has started. 

soberxp,
i really liked the words to the song you posted. very appropriate for me personally.  thanks for posting it,

claudia

bunnylife:
Thank you all for sharing your stories of testimonials. It truly blessed me.

I hear the same theme from all of you. Those of us chosen to know the truth that God was working behind the scenes in our lives. That friend that was set free from that fear was my ex-boyfriend. We were together for almost nine years. When I was attending church and he came with me and after the services he had all kinds of questions. Why do you tithe? Why if babies go to heaven why not killed them now so they don't go to hell? What about someone in Africa or some other place never heard of God, what happens to them? and many more. Answer to Africa or other place was God that will make a way. In my heart, I did believe God will make a way. The others, oh my goodness, I prayed and asked God "are you sure I am suppose to be with him?" Voice inside my head said "stay". God impressed me to stay in that relationship so I could be buffet with all this questions that brought doubt to the church doctrines. God cause me to stay with a person that constantly questioned those evil doctrines. I ask God several times again "are you sure about being with him?" Answer: "stay". I can see how God was working on my subconscious mind with all those questions as He knew when He was going to call me out of Babylon.

I thank my friend for all those questions later. He looked at me funny and said you are welcome. I know he doesn't understand the role he played in my life by God. However, I do and I thanked God.

Freedom ... oh to feel to light being drawn to the Light! It is so wonderful. Thank you all my brothers and sisters in Christ for sharing of yourselves.

soberxp thank you for your song.

God is Love and all is of Love!

In His Joy,
Bunni  :)

judith collier:
May God bless your socks off Bunni! I believe your life is rather hard if I remember correctly and you're still beautiful inside and out. I don't think I have ever been that sweet. Well, God made sour too, so I have to accept and bare with myself and besides how would I know sweet if I didn't know sour.
We who lean more to the sour are always amazed by people who retain their sweetness while bearing distress. I asked my husband if he thought I was ever sweet and he said, "maybe the first few years". We have been married 46.
Even God's grace can't seem to hang around too long with me but I have "loved much" and that covers a multitude, thanks be to God. He cuts us so much slack, He knows we are little nothings but I bet He enjoys some more than others, He just says he doesn't. And that's O.K. with me as long as I am counted somewhere in it all. 
And hell, forever, people have got to be nuts. I can get pretty mean and hateful at times but even at my worst I couldn't send someone to hell forever and I am nothing. Love, judy

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