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With God all things are possible

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Cypress:
Heh, you can send a message to a girl in this forum and get married that way  ;).

acomplishedartis:
First. I am still single.

But

I don't think that 'only respect of beliefs'  should be enough for me.


Because ''It is ALL connected'' !




UNEQUALLY YOKED   by L.Ray Smith

The phrase "unequally yoked together" is not a phrase that signifies a "marriage." Nonetheless, in principle it certainly applies to marriage.

First, let's read the entire Scripture:

    "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? Or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? For ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, says the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive, and will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty" (II Cor. 6:14-18).

The phrase "unequally yoked together" is the translation of just one Greek word, heterozugeo, which is a compound word that means, "to yoke up differently; to associate discordantly; unequally yoke together." It is used but this one time in the Bible.

The word "yoke" means a coupling as when two oxen are coupled or yoked together by a pulling beam to do work such as plowing a field or pulling a wagon.

And so Paul is telling the Corinthians congregation which was steeped in paganism and their cities peppered with pagan temples, that they should not be "unequally" yoked with those that practiced paganism or any works of darkness. They were to avoid: "unbelievers, unrighteousness, darkness, Belial, infidels, and idols." There it is. That's the list Paul gave them, exactly as we read above. Nothing is mentioned about marriage, but it does apply to marriage.

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Now we need to understand what's important in this teaching. Paul did not say they could not marry someone if they were "carnal." He did not even say that they could not marry someone if they were an "unbeliever." He warned against being "UNEQUALLY yoked with unbelievers." It is the "UNEQUALLY" yoked aspect that is most important.

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I believe that the key phrase in all this is to not become "unequally" yoked. Now Paul said with unbelievers, which makes it obviously the wrong thing to do. First you would be "yoked unequally" and to make it worse, to an "unbeliever." Now Paul tells us that this admonition came from him personally under God's inspiration certainly, nonetheless he adds: But to the rest speak I, not the Lord" (I Cor. 7:12).

And so I will take a little liberty myself and suggest that when it comes to marriage (remember Paul is not specifically speaking of marriage here), and say that we should neither become unequally yoked together with BELIEVERS. In other words, we should not become unequally yoked with another, but especially Unbelievers.




Marquez
Okay, maybe not the exact very same beliefs, but neither totally unequelly.  At list this is where am I now.   I agree that respect should be a good things, but respects stills; only a feeling.


Here a definition;

respect.
    * 1 a feeling of deep admiration for someone elicited by their qualities or achievements.

      ■ (respects) polite greetings.

    * 2 due regard for the feelings or rights of others.

    * 3 a particular aspect, point, or detail.

---

Honestly after a few years of extreme inequality I might get tired to be polite (note: for the ones that are already married and are tired to be polite, that patience should surely bring out something good).Anyway, the original post (With God all things are possible) is talking about someone looking for a mate, not about the ones that are already married or in long terms compromises. 
Moises

Oatmeal:

--- Quote from: Duane on March 16, 2011, 03:43:57 PM ---
Now she is remarried so he is free to remarry and longs for the intimacy and companionship.


--- End quote ---
I hope that it is OK that I write and try to express my confusion and wondering at such a statement.  I can only guess that such a statement arises from the “except for fornication” statements in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9.  Perhaps it is not wise for me to make a guess so please correct me if necessary.

Perhaps I am not capable of logical thinking but would someone please explain to me from the Scriptures why someone is free to remarry if his/her original and first marriage partner goes and marries someone else.  If God treats the second marriage as adultery then surely that means that the first marriage is still valid and remains current in God’s eyes.  If the second marriage frees up the partner of the first marriage to remarry then the second marriage just mentioned can no longer be adultery as the very act of committing this adulterous second marriage means that the first marriage is no longer valid and so immediately that makes the second marriage no longer adultery and also valid.  Am I thinking straight?

If a husband divorced his wife and by that act forced his wife to remarry (perhaps in past times she needed to remarry to survive) and therefore made her to be committing adultery (continuous or present tense not a one time action of adultery) then would the fact that his wife was now committing adultery mean that his divorce was now valid?
 
Perhaps someone could set up his or her marriage partner and arrange the circumstances to make the partner fall and thus free himself or herself to remarry. 

Here are the Gospel verses where Jesus mentioned marriage and divorce.  Please forgive the use of the KJV:

Matthew 5:31-32
It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

Matthew 19:3-12
The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto them,  Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

Mark 10:2-12
And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.

Luke 16:15-18
And he said unto them, Ye are they which justify yourselves before men; but God knoweth your hearts: for that which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God. The law and the prophets were until John: since that time the kingdom of God is preached, and every man presseth into it. And it is easier for heaven and earth to pass, than one tittle of the law to fail. Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.

It is only in Matthew (twice) that the “escape clause” appears: “except for fornication”.  The act of a married woman having sexual intercourse with a man that she is not married to is an adulterous act, but Jesus did not say “except for adultery”, but “except for fornication”.  Why does this “escape clause” not appear in the other Gospels, and also not in the writings of Paul?

Matthew 1:19
Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily.

Here is an example of a person who was intending to divorce someone whom he had not yet married – he was engaged to her but not married – so how could he divorce?


--- Quote --- from “WHAT IS MARRIAGE? . . . . . . . . . . . . . Biblestudy Feb. 2007”

Espousal was as legally binding as marriage.  Did you know that?  It was as legally binding as marriage itself.  When you were espoused or betrothed to another, the way it was done in Israel, you could call that woman your wife and she could call you, officially and legally, her husband.  But you couldn’t sleep together until you were fully married. 

When you were espoused to one another it had a covenant contract all by itself, before the wedding ceremony and the nuptials, which was another set of oaths and promises and covenants.  The way it worked was it was confirmed by oaths with a friend or a legal representative for the bridegroom and the bride was represented by her parents. 
What we would call this today is an engagement, I guess.  Engaged means we’re already determined we want to be married, we just haven’t done it yet, though it’s similar to that.  But in Israel it was a little more legal.  Today you can say, ‘I’m sorry honey, but here’s your ring back, I’m out of here.  And it’s all over, you don’t have to get an espousal divorce. 

[That’s like Mary and Joseph.]   That’s why people don’t understand it, he (Joseph) calls her his wife and she (Mary) calls him her husband.  People say, ‘how can that be, they are not even married.’  They were legally espoused and you can say husband and wife.  Mary and Joseph, they were considered husband and wife before they married.

--- End quote ---

There is an opinion that Matthew was written from a Jewish perspective.  This is the only Gospel where the “except for fornication” clause is included.  It is not mentioned in the other Gospels and it is not mentioned in the writings of Paul.  The Jewish woman was supposed to be a virgin at her wedding, but if there was falsehood in this regard then the marriage could be revoked.  Originally Joseph intended to divorce Mary.

The “escape clause” applied in this way makes sense (for virginity fraud); otherwise you get the logical inconsistencies that I mentioned at the beginning (if they were logical).  And remember that the “escape clause” said “fornication”, not “adultery”.

(I am aware that adultery is fornication but fornication is not necessarily adultery).

Those who think that the mainstream church teaches the opposite of the truth (I don’t think that this is a good way to decide what is true or not) can consider what the mainstream church teaches in this regard, and whence the easy divorce and remarriage doctrine.

The disciples appeared to be very dismayed at what Jesus taught in regard to marriage, divorce and adultery.

1 Corinthians 7:15
But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

The word “bondage” here is not the same word as the word the word “bound” as bound to a wife, or bound by the law to her husband.  Just thought that I would mention that.

In regard to “happy” second marriages:  Happiness does not necessarily mean that the marriage is a true marriage (a marriage in God’s eyes).

I am learning that all feelings and emotions and “it feels good”, and “I’m so in love”, and “it feels right” etc must be subservient to Scripture.  If Scripture says “No” then “No” is what is meant.

I am a divorced male.  It was my wife that separated from me but it was I that divorced her.  She has since remarried.  Before God and before my present understanding of the Scriptures I am of the conviction that I must not remarry while she is alive.  In the past I have worked hard to get remarried, but my knowledge now is such that I know that I must not.

For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

Am I being too hard on myself?

mharrell08:

--- Quote from: Oatmeal on March 31, 2011, 09:00:09 AM ---Am I being too hard on myself?
--- End quote ---


Yep

Ecc 7:16 Do not be overly righteous, nor be overly wise: Why should you destroy yourself?

What's done is done, move on. Anything that is not of faith is sin, so it's no point doing something for God when we don't really want to. If our heart is not into it, we shouldn't do it. A person who does so is only fooling themselves.

judith collier:
Boy, did that subject just get glossed over. Look at Elizabeth Taylor, she had 8 marriages. Her motivation to get married was she didn't think it right to live together. In her eyes she was doing the right thing. She didn't know any better. A lot of people don't know any better.
But a lot of people do and justify it. I think the problem is many don't know themselves and until you are drawn by God they see the other's mistakes instead of theirs'.
Do you know the Greeks can have more than one
marriage as long as there are no children. I wonder where they come up with that one. Good common sense though taking into account human nature.
judy

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