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[danagonzalez]

Thanks, love-magnified, I needed a laugh!!  Ray is great with his responses!!!---LOVE DANA,  GOD BLESS 

[danagonzalez]

Hi, jenny06, I just want to say that I think I am struggling with a similar problem, in that my husband isn't where I am-- in understanding God's truths.  He isn't even looking for God's truths.  Sometimes I talk about what I've been reading on bibletruths and he just falls asleep right there in a chair!! It has become quite obviious to me that my husband doesn't have any hunger for the truth.  Can you believe it?!  I know, it's God's plan, not mine, His timing, not mine.....I do still get frustrated, though!!!So I Pray..... LOVE DANA

[rvhill]

This is an interesting concept RVHill

Are you suggesting that Paul did not love God?

That each one of us falls short of what even we imagine is an expectation of God is a given, but the amazing thing is that God's love is unconditional.

I have always thought of James verse to mean it is better to say nothing and do a little than say a lot and do nothing. The cool thing about works is they are measured from the heart, and only God can do that.

I think I know exactly how Paul felt. 

Darren

Mark 10:18
"Why do you call me good?" Jesus answered. "No one is good—except God alone.

Romans 3:12 All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one." [ Psalms 14:1-3; 53:1-3; Eccles. 7:20]

If you loved God would you not be good? I believe Paul tried to love God, and the things of God, I believe he wanted to love  them also, but did that mean he loved them? I want and try to love God and the things of God. It does not mean I love them though.

 Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
 doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not its own, is not provoked, taketh not account of evil;
 rejoiceth not in unrighteousness, but rejoiceth with the truth;
  beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
  Love never faileth:

By Paul own definition not one loves, but God.  this why No one is good—except God alone.

[jenny06]

Thanks all. Although I am not sure how the reverse psychology would work. Am I supposed to say, "Oh, no, don't read that"? LOL
Earlier tonight I did mention the site and that he might want to make create his own identity for this forum or a connection on his computer settings for BT. Fancy computers these days let each family member create their own settings. Anyhow, he asked me why it was so important to me that he share my way of thinking. I just told him that I did not want him to share my way of anything and that I just want him to come to his own conclusions. I would like him to be a stronger head of the household, stronger in faith that is. I just keep thinking that if he was deeper rooted that some issues we deal with would ebb. He, to be honest here, has anger issues. It is a bone of contention between us about causing the children to wrath , if you get my drift. One of our sons is very verbal and has no problem calling his father to the mat. Quite frankly, I think God is trying to get his attention, but my son is as a prophet in his own house, so to speak. My husband does not receive from me. If I say the sky is blue, he ignores me or argues that it is not blue. If another person, man or woman, tells him that the sky is blue, he proudly tells me that he learned from so and so that the sky is blue! I kid not. With no one to account to outside our home, I am at odds. I cannot help but feel that if he grows in Christ, the blinders will be lifted.

We came from different ends of the pendulum. His parents disciplined harshly, mine were not present most the time. When he says, "Jump," the kids better jump, according to his view. I guess I am getting off track. I will definitely drop the subtle hints with copies of paragraphs from Lake of Fire. And, Dana, I fully understand. Mine falls asleep also or sometimes he expects me to yell over the volume set on 30. He makes a face when I ask him to turn the volume down so I don't have to yell. I have pondered why God would put me with such an obstinant man. I guess it may be because I am stubborn and we are a perfect pair or at least I have the stamina to keep him hopping. LOL   

[inezray]

Hi Jenny,

Your story is identical to mine. Even the part of how each of you were raised. My husband just is not interested in spiritual things at all. We spent many years in the church system together but he never seemed to be searching for truth. Sometimes I think he was just pacifying me to keep the peace. We are on totally different wave lenghts sorta speak. When I first came to the truth of UR I couldnt' contain my joy and told him what I believed. Since then he no longer wants anything to do with God. He is a great man, a wonderful father, extremely generous, and I love him. I am at the point now of letting it all go and not worry about it. He will come if God calls him and until then I will work out my relationship with God by myself. It seems that we have to come to the end of ourselves,at least that is how I see it now.
God be with you,
Inez

[Scrybe]

I had a wife that backslid tremendously.  After she left I suddenly noticed that I hungered for the things of God, but that her attitude had suffocated that hunger.  Had I stopped worrying about Her soul, and instead put my eyes on Jesus I would have been much happier. 

[danagonzalez]

Hey, isn't it great how much it bothers us when someone has a different opinion than we do?  We start really searching for answers to back up what we believe ( or some of you old folks just dust the answers off up in the" old attic") And sometimes while we're searching for those answers God takes that perfect opportunity to give another revelation....I find it to be exciting!! It's so great to have fellowship with others who read BT's and not feel so alone...You people are becoming like a family.  LOVE DANA

[jenny06]

Did I fail to mention that he was raised Catholic. My family was Catholic also, though I was the last of seven and I was left unbaptized unlike the rest. I got on board with going to a Catholic church, going to catechism, and the whole nine yards. My husband is the type to suddenly sound very Southern if someone he is talking to breaths with a Southern drawl. LOL  He does not hear himself, but the kids and I do.    He has grown leaps and bounds.  Sometimes he amazes me that he knows scripture.  I cannot even keep paragraph and verse down pat.  I struggle with my memory. Mostly I paraphrase or can reiterate the jist of it. But sometimes his talk does not match his walk.  I am sure that I am the same in that I don't always look like the picture of love and sweetness all the time. The kids and discipline is a real struggle for us because we have been raised so differently. My father virtually never lay a hand on me. Though I have no memory of my mother hitting me, one of my sisters said she had. I was still in the crib or so she said. His parents were awful, even down to forcing him to eat beets.  His mother was the type to apologize right away, all huggy and stuff. My parents were distant and I was a wall flower that blended with my scenery. I am the opposite with my kids in that I hug and get mushy with them. Early on, huggy would not describe me with my husband. I was not raised in a house with raised voices, so I did the only thing I knew to do...withdraw. Becoming one flesh is not as easy as it seems. Does anyone else think that the most extreme personality ends up marrying the most extreme opposite.  It is as if God is balancing us out by pairing us with our extreme opposite.  Now I have myself wondering that if I were not sooooo extreme, that my husband would have been not soooo extreme the other way. God definitely does put the oddest pairs together, does He not?   

[jennie]

Hey Jennnie06!!! What a great name! I am the other  Jennie the old one that makes biscuits!!! I was reading this line of posts and had to write you. My husband has changed so much since we married. he wanted nothing to do with the church which really was he wanted nothing to do with God. He was brought up in a difficult, legalistic, religious atmosphere and that is what he associated with God. Through a lot of prayers, soft answers and much love he is a different man today. He has a very close relationship with God and sees people that cross our paths as the people God has given us to help. I am not saying all this very well but just know that there are so many of us who have been or are in your shoes. I will be lifting you up in prayer.

[jenny06]

Hi Jennie. You make biscuits? Thank you for the prayers.  jenny

[ned]

All right, coincidence - I think not!
Just today I was driving with my husband and we weren't in the best of moods as far as "loving one another" and I don't know if I just felt sorry for myself, but was thinking "Why me?" I stayed quiet (usually I would rather be vocal) during the car ride and just lifted it up to God, the whole time wondering where this marriage was going and why we just couldn't be on the same page, then I read the post by Jenny06 and Dana!  So I'm not alone in my spiritual walk with a husband who "is not", and sorry to say so girls, but it's nice to know you are there in the same boat as me, for support.
God has allowed all our marriages, and by leaning on Him he will perfect them for us. Thank God for knowing God.
Marie

[danagonzalez]

Hi Marie, I'm glad, too, to know that I am not the only one...It seems that there are alot of couples like ours...I think God did it to me because He wanted me to look directly to Him for my spiritual needs...I'm co-dependent and if my husband was right with me spiritually I'd probably worship him or something..ugh!!Or maybe not!!I don't know, but it can be frustrating----God uses my husband to work the patience.But, he really is a good guy though

...LOVE DANA

[jenny06]

I have been there as you, Marie, in asking the question, "Why me, Lord?"  Ironic that my husband was the answer to my prayer to God to find me a husband because I never made the right choices in men and as I was a single mother with two daughters, I really needed to keep from another mistake.  It has not been a cake walk with him in the least.  He had demons that nearly ended my willingness to stay married to him.  I really did have to learn to rely on God to change him or at least sustain my love for him.  I had not even given my life fully over to God at that point in time, but I did believe in Him enough to pray to Him.  I made a simple prayer, putting out a fleece, asking for four things I wanted in a husband (these things were in no way selfish---equally yoked...even though I am the one who seems to lead the way, would love my girls, and wanted kids as I wanted more).  The fourth fleece was a real test.  It was something in my heart I wanted, but again it was not too much to ask, especially of God!  I have learned that what my sister says is true.  Honey catches more bees than vinegar.  That is the biggest obstacle I have had to overcome.  I am not used to pleading my case and I was not raised in the forum of dicplomacy!  You are difinitely are not alone, Marie. 

[psalmsinger]

Hello Friends,

I just wanted to drop in from lurking to say an encouraging word from my perspective.  My husband and I walked slightly different "religious" paths for 20 years before cricumstances and a tv preacher brought us together to the same way of erred thinking.  As I reflect on the past and the teachings about "the Myth of Freewill", I see clearly now that every circumstance, though hard, and every doctrine and group we have come in contact with even in error, was God's way of refining us and bringing us together to His Truth. Thanks and praise be to the Lord God, Savior of All! He truly does work out His Good, but it is His way and in His time always asking, seeking and knocking.  Trust Him and pray for patience to bring your husband to the Truth as well .  Rest in the Lord!

Barbara