bible-truths.com/forums

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Need Account Help?  Email bibletruths.forum@gmail.com   

Forgotten password reminders does not work. Contact the email above and state what you want your password changed to. (it must be at least 8 characters)

Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding  (Read 5455 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Revilonivek

  • Guest
Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« on: April 28, 2011, 05:52:09 PM »
imagine 7 months suffering with  hemorrhoids?? That's before Prep H was invented

Finally figured out the meaning of emerods. They are hemorrhoids. Emerods are kjv 1611's version for hemorrhoids without the h.

According to 1st Samuel chapter 5 and 6, keep in mind that The Philistines were struck with hemorrhoids  by God for 7 months because they wouldn't return the ark of the covenant back to the Israelites. Anyway, the Philistines figured the only way to get rid of their itchy problem (hemorrhoids)was to give the Ark of the Covenant back to the Israelites, and make some golden images of hemorrhoids and mice also to soothe God's anger.  I feel bad for those poor souls.. imagine having hemorrhoids for 7 long months.. makes me wanna itch.


5:9  And it was so, that, after they had carried it about, the hand of the LORD was against the city with a very great destruction: and he smote the men of the city, both small and great, and they had emerods in their secret parts.

5:12  And the men that died not were smitten with the emerods: and the cry of the city went up to heaven.








« Last Edit: April 28, 2011, 05:56:41 PM by Revilonivek »
Logged

Craig

  • Bible-Truths Forum Member
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4282
  • There are two kinds of cops.The quick and the dead
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #1 on: April 28, 2011, 06:25:49 PM »
Who says God does not have a sense of humor?

Craig
Logged

Gabriel

  • Guest
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #2 on: April 28, 2011, 07:47:34 PM »
I was just reading about this the other day, and couldn't stop laughing, Bad me.   ;D
Logged

Cypress

  • Bible-Truths Forum Member
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 173
  • I <3 jj81
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #3 on: April 28, 2011, 11:12:12 PM »
Quote from: Craig on April 28, 2011, 06:25:49 PM
Who says God does not have a sense of humor?

Craig

This is so something I would have done if I were God lol!
Logged
Elaine

Duane

  • Guest
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #4 on: April 29, 2011, 04:30:01 AM »
I was looking for Longhorn to come up with:   "in the KJV 1611 they were called "emarods"; in the
NKJV they are called "asteroids"!
Logged

lilitalienboi16

  • Bible-Truths Forum Member
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1870
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #5 on: April 29, 2011, 04:45:33 AM »
I lol'ed  ;D
Logged
1 Cor 1:10 "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment."

Samson

  • Guest
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #6 on: April 29, 2011, 10:52:39 AM »
Quote from: Gabriel on April 28, 2011, 07:47:34 PM
I was just reading about this the other day, and couldn't stop laughing, Bad me.   ;D


Believe Me Dude, I've had problems in that area, not for 7 Months, but I highly doubt that I would have lasted that long before returning the Ark Of The Covenant. Knowing what I know about Hemorrhoids, All God would need to do is warn Me once about getting them.  :-[,  :'(,  ;).
Logged

dre91

  • Guest
Re: Hemmorrhoids in the bible- not kidding
« Reply #7 on: April 29, 2011, 12:32:52 PM »
I agree, that's funny.God does have a sense of humor.
Logged
Pages: [1]   Go Up
« previous next »
 

Page created in 0.047 seconds with 22 queries.