What does Loving thy enemy mean?

[zander]

What does this mean?

There have been 1 or 2 people in the past who i cant say i have hated but i should say, i didnt really wish to converse with too much.  Thankfully, these people didnt work with me.  One of them was a very good friend of mine.  Last year, we were no longer friends (long story).  I hope he is well and i wish no ill against him - but - i dont ever wish to speak to him again.  What does that mean?  Does that mean really i hate him?  There is another example of where a person disrespected me. I mean, again, i dont think i dislike her, but i would now avoid her and probably not acknowledge here, even if she is with my friends.  Do i hate her?  I dont feel like i do.

Any pointers?

[River]

Hi zander,

Just so you know, your not alone. I find this one of the most difficult things to deal with. Humans are not easy! 

This paper Ray wrote on love talks about matters such as this. Even Ray speaks of his relationship with his neighbor. It's good to read it if you haven't allready.

http://forums.bible-truths.com/index.php/topic,3719.0.html

[mharrell08]

What does this mean?

There have been 1 or 2 people in the past who i cant say i have hated but i should say, i didnt really wish to converse with too much.  Thankfully, these people didnt work with me.  One of them was a very good friend of mine.  Last year, we were no longer friends (long story).  I hope he is well and i wish no ill against him - but - i dont ever wish to speak to him again.  What does that mean?  Does that mean really i hate him?  There is another example of where a person disrespected me. I mean, again, i dont think i dislike her, but i would now avoid her and probably not acknowledge here, even if she is with my friends.  Do i hate her?  I dont feel like i do.

Any pointers?

Don't wish ill upon them...know that you are no better and have your faults as well...be thankful in the knowledge that they will be converted, as yourself.

The Scriptures, especially Paul's epistles, have taught me these key things time and time again. Don't worry about being kissy-kissy, buddy-buddy with everyone, because you'll only be fooling yourself. Just you asking this question shows the intent to not let malice reign in your heart...most wouldn't even care to ask.


Marques

[Revilonivek]

What does this mean?

There have been 1 or 2 people in the past who i cant say i have hated but i should say, i didnt really wish to converse with too much.  Thankfully, these people didnt work with me.  One of them was a very good friend of mine.  Last year, we were no longer friends (long story).  I hope he is well and i wish no ill against him - but - i dont ever wish to speak to him again.  What does that mean?  Does that mean really i hate him?  There is another example of where a person disrespected me. I mean, again, i dont think i dislike her, but i would now avoid her and probably not acknowledge here, even if she is with my friends.  Do i hate her?  I dont feel like i do.

Any pointers?

Don't wish ill upon them...know that you are no better and have your faults as well...be thankful in the knowledge that they will be converted, as yourself.

The Scriptures, especially Paul's epistles, have taught me these key things time and time again. Don't worry about being kissy-kissy, buddy-buddy with everyone, because you'll only be fooling yourself. Just you asking this question shows the intent to not let malice reign in your heart...most wouldn't even care to ask.


Marques

Where's the like button? I agree with Marques here. We all have our faults, doesn't mean you have to be best friends right this minute with them, it's  almost impossible when are at polar opposites. We all will be one with God one day and it is only when we'll really be best buddies:) just acknowledge we aren't any better than them either,everyone's on their spiritual journey as we are on too, just different experiences, same goal:)  just wish them good tidings and pray for them. They will get there one day. Thanks Marques,  I needed the reminder. Thanks!

[zander]

So its ok if i avoid someone?  and like they are in the same room as me?  No ill feelings - just avoid them?

[mharrell08]

So its ok if i avoid someone?  and like they are in the same room as me?  No ill feelings - just avoid them?

Well obviously there are some ill feelings, otherwise you wouldn't be avoiding them. You can either attempt to hash it out with them now or later. Just know that it will get worked out, either in this age or the next.

If you don't feel like you are not ready for that now, then simply wait until you are ready.



Marques

[Revilonivek]

So its ok if i avoid someone?  and like they are in the same room as me?  No ill feelings - just avoid them?

It's hard.. I am going through a similar issue with my friend and her family. my friend and I have grown close the last few years than ever before but her family hates me, especially her mother. for even bringing up or talking to their daughter about God, his grand plan for mankind, great things about him. scriptures and what Ray talks about, and many deep stuff about the bible and God. There's alot of tensions every time i'm  near her mother. Her mother didn't like me because she feels like I'm the one who's making her daughter backslide from Pentecostalism.  i didn't do anything. the only thing I am guilty of is talking about it. I even told my friend to not take it from me but see for herself, study the scriptures, be open to what it reveals and pray alot. her mother doesn't believe the truths of God, and accuses me to be making her daughter go to hell and is scared for her daughter.  I have tried to make peace with her mother but she's not willing. at least not now.  Ive struggled with that at the back of my head, knowing that there's no peace. LIke Marques said, wish them good tidings, and remember they will come to the truth one day and everything will be perfect. everything here are temporary and we'll all understand one day. After all, we are all family, but there's divisions here in this age. it won't be in the next age I need to be reminded of that frequently. It's really hard with all the tensions. Hang in there. God knows your heart. God strengthens our hearts through circumstances such as this.. God never wants to keep it easy for any of us. It's how we learn things best.

[zander]

Its a bit of a hard one to understand.  I mean, if i speak to them (as in like try and make conversation), i am basically lying to myself.  if i shake their hand, im lying, if i kiss them (on the cheek to say hi) i am lying....where is the line drawn?

Its not an issue, as i barely see them, but i just wanted to understand this a bit more.

[Joel]

Scriptures can help concerning our enemies.

Proverbs 16:7 When a man's ways please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.

Proverbs 25:21-22 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:
For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord shall reward thee.

Matthew 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy.
               44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

Verse 44 we can see by what Jesus is saying what a real enemy does to us. Maybe some people we think are our enemies, aren't really by his standards.


Joel

[Revilonivek]

Scriptures can help concerning our enemies.

Proverbs 16:7 When a man's ways please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.

Proverbs 25:21-22 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:
For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord shall reward thee.

Matthew 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy.
               44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

Verse 44 we can see by what Jesus is saying what a real enemy does to us. Maybe some people we think are our enemies, aren't really by his standards.


Joel

Yes, That makes sense, Overcome evil with good, not overcome evil with evil... Good is God's light- just hard when put in actual situations but gotta learn how to do it right. def not easy.  Thanks Joel.







Denise

[Revilonivek]

Its a bit of a hard one to understand.  I mean, if i speak to them (as in like try and make conversation), i am basically lying to myself.  if i shake their hand, im lying, if i kiss them (on the cheek to say hi) i am lying....where is the line drawn?

Its not an issue, as i barely see them, but i just wanted to understand this a bit more.

Yeah, it's an awkward situation, have you tried telling them how you feel? sometimes talking helps?

[G. Driggs]

One of them was a very good friend of mine.  Last year, we were no longer friends (long story).  I hope he is well and i wish no ill against him - but - i dont ever wish to speak to him again.  What does that mean?  Does that mean really i hate him? 

Don't wish ill upon them...know that you are no better and have your faults as well...

Ditto, not saying you hate them zander, but maybe you see something in them you do not like. Turn it back on you and maybe you wont mind them anymore and what ever it is about them will not bother you so much. You might see that you would do or say the same as them in the same situation.

Mat 7:3  And why do you look on the splinter that is in your brother's eye, but do not consider the beam that is in your own eye?
Mat 7:4  Or how will you say to your brother, Let me pull the splinter out of your eye; and, behold, a beam is in your own eye?

As Ray points out, there is a beam in both his eye and your eye, huge and small character flaws in both of you, as well as all of us.

Peace,

G.Driggs

[Kat]

Hi Zander,

I would like to add that you need to make sure your own heart/attitude is right concerning this person.

I mean, if i speak to them (as in like try and make conversation), i am basically lying to myself.  if i shake their hand, im lying, if i kiss them (on the cheek to say hi) i am lying....where is the line drawn?

Why is that? Why would you be lying, do you still harbor resentment towards them? You need to forgive or do whatever needs to be done in order to have a clean conscience before God about this matter. God is the One you must give account to.

1Tim 1:5  The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.

Do whatever needs to be done to straighten this matter out on your side, that is what you are accountable for, how they handle it is not your concern. Just do the best you can to do to set things right and clear your conscience.

mercy, peace and love
Kat

[zander]

Cool, i appreciate your replies they all help.  Im still slightly confused, but thats just an accepted part of life.

[Rene]

Do whatever needs to be done to straighten this matter out on your side, that is what you are accountable for, how they handle it is not your concern. Just do the best you can to do to set things right and clear your conscience.

Hi Zander,

I was thinking along these same lines, however, there are times when it may not be possible to be "friendly" with some people.  Although, I do believe we should make every effort to be civil towards all.

The 12th chapter of Romans is an excellent source of guidance for how we should be conducting ourselves with others.  I especially appreciate the spirit behind this scripture:

Romans 12:18 - "If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men." (NAS)


René
                     

[JohnMichael]

Hi Zander,

G. Driggs stated:

Ditto, not saying you hate them zander, but maybe you see something in them you do not like. Turn it back on you and maybe you wont mind them anymore and what ever it is about them will not bother you so much. You might see that you would do or say the same as them in the same situation.

That is so true. There was a time, in the recent past, when I couldn't stand someone. Anything they said would make me LIVID. I just "knew" it was the other person who was wrong, and I was the one who was right.

Oh boy, was I wrong. God turned on the light and showed me that it was ME that I was getting angry with. What I thought were characteristics of the other person were actually characteristics of myself that I didn't want to acknowledge. Therefore, I was projecting my iniquities onto the other person. It was as if God held up a mirror in front of me that I couldn't hide from.

This may or may not be the case in your situation, but don't discount it. It may be that God is showing you a quality of yourself that you may not even know about yourself. We don't even know what's in our own hearts, BUT God does.

Also, what Rene and Kat have said is also SO true. The ATTITUDE is very important to God. Take for example the following passage of Scripture:

Luk 18:9  And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:
Luk 18:10  Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican.
Luk 18:11  The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican.
Luk 18:12  I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.
Luk 18:13  And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.
Luk 18:14  I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.

Notice the difference in attitude between the Pharisee and the Publican.

I'm not saying any of this in condemnation; not pointing fingers at anyone other than who looks back at me in the mirror.

In Him,
John

[gmik]

I like Rene's post.....

I have to love someone like my enemy...so in a same room I do not go around them....in the hall or accidentally face to face a small smile or nod and I keep moving....

IF

they were to want to stop and talk then I def. would be polite and civil.

IN AS MUCH AS IT IS POSSIBLE,  be at peace (w/ yourself) and don't give Satan any room to move in on it...