Marriage - A funny (though cynical?) view

[onelovedread]

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

Marriages are made in heaven. But, then again, so are thunder, lightening, tornadoes and tsunamis.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late.

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

I fell in love at first sight... I should have looked twice.

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside

Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her

A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he's finished

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way

I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays

"I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic."

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together

When I married Ms Right, I didn't know her first name was "Always"!

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook.... But the law allows only one wife

[Samson]

Priceless, absolutely priceless,  .

My Favorites !

When I married Ms Right, I didn't know her first name was "Always"!

I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook.... But the law allows only one wife

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her

Thanks for sharing the levity, Samson, 

[acomplishedartis]

''And this I say, brethren, the time henceforth is having been shortened--that both those having wives may be as not having'' 1 Corinthians 7:29

See?




ps. Samson, I hope your comment doesn't take you in troubles... 

[Samson]

''And this I say, brethren, the time henceforth is having been shortened--that both those having wives may be as not having'' 1 Corinthians 7:29

See?




ps. Samson, I hope your comment doesn't take you in troubles... 

No Moises,

My wife already read the list, She knows I didn't apply it to her,  . I used to be Marriage to someone that exemplified #1 from My list of favorites, Oh Well, no need to worry about that one Now.

More worried about my Quadriceps Tendon on right leg, think it might have a partial tear, although it can't be ruptured or I wouldn't be walking at all. These are the things one has to worry about when you can't afford Medical coverage and your over 55, but not eligible for Medicare/Medicaid.

Carry On, Samson.

[acomplishedartis]

Samson, You are so lucky to have a wife that have the same main believes about the Scriptures.

I hope your leg gets better. I will pray for you.


Moises

ps. (God save me from that scary list!)

[cjwood]

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays




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yes indeed, thank you for sharing the levity.  i enjoyed all of the list, but especially laughed out loud on the one i've bolded above.  the laughter was much needed tonite. 

claudia