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[John9362]

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels... Helllloooo!!! Bottles won't fit in printer!!!
March - Got really excited! Finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months ... box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on escalator for hours ... power went out!!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid ... wrong instructions on packet ... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!
June - Tried to go water skiing ... Bummer ... couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition ... learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!
August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm ... car swamped because soft-top was open.
September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it??
October - Hate M &M's .... they are so hard to peel.
November - Burned turkey. Baked it for 4 1/2 days. Instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!
December - Couldn't call 911 ..."duh" ... like there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!!!

What a year!!

[Rhys 🕊]

Being a long haired blonde myself I can say this is soooooooooo..... true 

Those M & M's are cursed. I'm sure of it.

Q.Why did the blonde get thrown out of the M & M factory?
A. She kept throwing out all the W's.


Rhys

[Gina]

Thanks for the laughs!

[Rhys 🕊]

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive, but blonde female neighbour came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
       
      A little later she came out of her house again went to the mailbox and again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
       
      Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying', "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."

[John9362]

Hehehehe LOL !! Good one Rhys 

[theophilus]

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive, but blonde female neighbour came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
       
      A little later she came out of her house again went to the mailbox and again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
       
      Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying', "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."

OH MAN! THIS ONE IS SO FUNNY!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

[Ian 155]

teaching on blondes not allowed   

[theophilus]

teaching on blondes not allowed   

Mocking people over 40 isn't either!  And I am over 40!

[Ian 155]

teaching on blondes not allowed   

Mocking people over 40 isn't either!  And I am over 40!

Mocking over 40s  - so am I ... that be my 3rd eldest son in the photo

[Gina]

Your 3rd eldest, Ian?  That's so misleading.  haha  I'm kidding -- I knew that was your son. 

Very handsome he is!   OOoooooo! I hope that didn't sound judgmental!???

[gregorydc]

Actually Gina it sounded like Yoda. Lol. By the way good jokes guys.
Greg

[Gina]

haha!! It did sound like Yoda!  I love it.

Okay, stay on topic party people!    ( You know the rulesSSSS!! )