Hi Virginia (my grandmothers name!)
I'm new here and was going through a few forums last night. I sat and cried as I read your words. I'm so sorry that you had to endure such horrible evil as a child. No one deserves that and you didn't either. I hate what they did to you and their sin and abuse they inflicted on you a helpless soul when they should have been protecting you.
It's a horrible thing to sit and hear such evil and I want you to know that as a child you tried your best to cope with it the best that you could without any skills at all to cope. Forgive that little girl inside that didn't know how to stop that abuse from happening.
I know several friends I have known from my abuse class I attended for a year said the one thing in adulthood that was the most painful was that their mother's didn't stop the abusive father/or family member and turned their heads to the horrific abuse. This hurt them more than anything later as they had their own children. The bondage of sin is so deep, manipulative, and controlling so even the mothers were unable to escape. There is fear in bondage.
I can't imagine the emotions you are going through now with your sons court date coming up.
Adversity is so cutting, real and in your face sometimes, but God knows what He has to allow (on top of all of your childhood) to make you shine even more for His glory.
He doesn't want to mame you for life with the fire or even drop you in it! He wants to make you reflect His unfailing love to others. You know He is sovereign and you know He is loving and good. Stand firm in those truths when that wall of fear hits you so hard it takes your breath away!
Thank Him right then that the past is finished and you will never live those days again, the future He has promised His unfailing love to be in the future "nothing can separate us from the love of God.....nor things to come," so hope is always there in abundance for you to walk by faith in. Then ask yourself if you are alright and secure in Yeshua that very moment that seemingly real fear hits you. Remember His words He said, over and over again "Fear not!"
If you are alright...then thank Him for that too!
It may only take another 5 minutes for that wall of fear to hit you again but He'll be there in that moment waiting for you to rest in His eternal Sabbath rest again 5 minutes later!
He's grace is always there in abundance surrounding every detail of your beautiful vessel He alone is creating! He's making something so amazing for His glory for allowing you to go through the plethora of trails and fire!
"Heavenly Father I pray for your sweet Virginia that You would show her how loved she really is today in some small detail that only you would know. You love the details of our lives and I know you are creating a beautiful one of a kind daughter by all of these many trials you have allowed and are still allowing. Let her "taste and see" that you are so good even in the hurting times" of unknown change and future. You promised Virginia to never leave her or forsake her and she needs your comfort even more right now. You're will is all important to her and she is willing to endure with your unfailing love and enduring strength that only You can supply. Keep her from fighting and self preserving through this trail, but keep her resting in the finished work of Jesus Christ! Amen!"
Hugs! xoxox
Loverly
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Topic: prayer for strenght to face my Son's sentenceing.. (Read 9618 times)