> General Discussions
Did I not hate God enough ?
rick:
Hello to all.
I'm in better spirit today. I read each response and am very thankful for the wisdom in each and every one I read.
The things I'm going through have not been for a day or even a week but over a few years. Those things amongst other things had come to overwhelm me to the point where I did complain about this affliction I live with everyday.
A few hours after doing this thread I felt regret for having said the things I did, I was very angry and I guess sometimes I don't always handle anger well but after reading all that has been said to me I don't have any regrets about this thread.
I see now how Satan played me like a fiddle and boy did I fall for it big time having a pity party for myself, I lost sight of my hope in Christ.
Kat, you put down Rom 9:20 and in doing so that broke my heart but you gave me exactly what I deserved and I thank you for doing so.
Well, I do love God and maybe my lesson was to never question God for putting me through all He puts me through.
I'm still going through everything, nothing has subsided but I'm Focus on Gods truths again and for me that's my strength which is knowing God really does love me and my life is not some crude joke but rather my life is about being made in the image of God and being made in Gods image is not an easy thing but I understand it's necessary that I go through all these things in order for God to complete His perfect will for me.
I thank you all for ur patients with me in my time of trials and tribulations. Although I have not read all of Rays papers I'm sure Ray never said ones walk with God would be easy.
Your all awesome and I appreciate all that was said to me.
God bless.
octoberose:
Rick, at it's very best this should be a safe place to be truthful. That's what you did and now you move on. I doubt very much that what you wrote only applied to you ( I know it didn't) . God gets it. If you were not faithful to the Father, you would not be struggling at all. You would just fall into whatever was easiest for you to do and join the world.
I'm glad you're doing better. :)
rick:
--- Quote from: octoberose on June 17, 2016, 09:28:26 PM ---Rick, at it's very best this should be a safe place to be truthful. That's what you did and now you move on. I doubt very much that what you wrote only applied to you ( I know it didn't) . God gets it. If you were not faithful to the Father, you would not be struggling at all. You would just fall into whatever was easiest for you to do and join the world.
I'm glad you're doing better. :)
--- End quote ---
Hi Octoberose,
Thanks for understanding and ur right as far as me not being the only one. There are some who might go through things that may cause me to be ashamed as their trials could be greater than my own.
We learn many things from Ray and we all enjoy these truths that are rare to find . It's a different ball game when one discovers they are living what they learned. I learned a few things these past few days and these things may not necessarily reflect the views of this website, the carnal mind is all about self preservation and I found or discovered a mid point and what I mean is that when God calls us we feel like we are on a beautiful honeymoon at least that's how I felt but the honeymoon ends and the training begins, the carnal part of us cannot understand or rejects anything that it considers negative.
And because of this, one could feel or succumb to the idea God is picking on us or God doesn't care what we are going through but the spiritual part excepts all that comes from the hand of God as for our own good.
I believe in the book of Job he ask will we except good from the hand of God but not evil ? The carnal mind only excepts good and rejects the evil but the spiritual mind will except both from their creator.
Here is something to think about , whatever happens , is Gods intention and everything that happens does not take God by surprise because God knows the end from the beginning.
Now here is the other thing I learned and again this may not necessarily reflect the views of this website but when anyone gets in your face it's only a test its Gods intention and carried out by Satan , iyour not really in a way dealing with the person but with Satan with Gods approval specifically designed for you.
Do not argue with Satan , remember Michael the arch angle did not argue with Satan but only said the Lord rebuke you.
No trial to me is a failure even if we think we blew it God sees to it we learn and you know Christ is very good at what He does.
It's a beautiful website to learn from and also to be comforted too by brothers and sisters who are more advance in knowledge than we are.
God bless all.
octoberose:
I think you are still reflecting the Truths here. :)
When I came here I thought I had found a pearl of great price and really couldn't understand that every believer I knew wasn't at the ready to learn it too. At that time I wasn't in the middle of my hardest test but I soon was. God knew to teach me He had to get me at my most vulnerable - and that is through my children. I've always been grateful that I wasn't influenced from the falling away of my child as a reason to believe in the salvation of all. I didn't yet know the journey we'd be going on when I came here.
God knows I Long to hear Him, long to have his Spirit stir me in a Loud way, not a quiet way. But He is very very patient and I must be also.
You said, " The carnal mind only accepts good and rejects the evil- but the spiritual mind will accept both from their creator." That's it. Exactly right. I appreciate the reminder. And I love "Christ is very good at what He does." When our kids were little and would go on an adventure and come home safely we'd say "100% survivability!" Ha, that's what Christ does. 100% and He will get us all there- each on the journey that He has laid out for us.
God bless.
Jeff:
--- Quote from: Rick on June 16, 2016, 03:44:30 PM ---I don't remember hating God but I do remember being afraid of God....no not afraid of God but afraid of what He could do to me me.....Im referring to the Christian propaganda.
I'm angry today and my anger is towards God, one would think if you believe in God things should be getting better not worst but in all honesty my life is pure b/s , if my life is solemnly Gods intentions then what my life is must be according to God.
I'm trying to figure out how all the evil in the world is going to make me a better person or in Gods image ? The bible says we are either a slave to sin or to righteousness, I thought about that and concluded either way I'm a slave , some say your better being a slave to righteousness than sin but do we get to decide which we shall be ?
It's God who decides what I am or is it me who decides what I am ? Or is there something causing me to be what I am ? maybe today God decided I should be angry towards Him , looking at my life and knowing its of God then maybe God wants me to hate Him, to feel some kind of rage against Him.
I never felt hatred towards God or some rage against Him just fear maybe that's why things aren't getting better just worst. Maybe I was supposed to hate God in the beginning before coming to know His truths but that would be impossible because all is of God.
It's true that God is awesome and that His plan for all of us is good I just don't feel any love towards God today because all the circumstances He sends me causes my life to be just pure b/s.
I hope ur having a better day than me .
--- End quote ---
Rick,
I posted something not too long ago that is almost a mirror of what you wrote here. I certainly don't have answers to your questions, but the kind people here most likely will provide some very pertinent Scriptures for you, excellent advice, and an assurance that God's will is with you every moment of every day.
What I'd like to share with you is sympathy and hopefully a sense that you're not alone. I understand first-hand what you seem to be experiencing. God brought us to this place of refuge and learning, and yet for some of us, it would seem that our walk with God is in decline - we seem to be going in the opposite direction from what we might expect, after having learned such amazing truths about the Scriptures and our Creator.
Kat responded to my post with something that comforted me (as she and others so often do :))) by saying that "for some, the walk is more difficult than it is for others". This, in its simplicity, is profound. It told me that it's understood that we will not all experience life in the same way, but that God is still in control, he has not abandoned us, he's just working to teach each of us something unique, according to how he created us individually. We are all the same, but certainly we are created different in such a way that it serves God's purpose. We are the hands, or the feet, or the head, etc, and we each have a purpose in the body of Christ.
You are not alone in your struggle Rick, and while I pray that you do not suffer any more than you have to, I'm also encouraged to know that I'm not alone. in spirit I'm walking with you, knowing indirectly what you are facing each day.
My life took an unexpected turn about a year ago. Without going into detail. I can say that what happened seems to be drawing me away from God, further each day, and it's brought me to a place of fear and utter despair. I have no power to change anything, so this is God's will, and my lot. I don't know the reason, but there must be one, and it has a purpose.
A few days ago, I found myself telling God that I hated him for what he's doing to me. I've never done that before. I was ashamed, but I also had a sense that God knew what I was feeling. I've since repented, but am no closer to understanding my circumstances.
I know that one day this will all make sense, but for now it's simply horrifying to me, and I get up each morning knowing that there's nothing I can do but get through the day as best I can. It's all God, the good and bad in my life, and he's using it all to prepare me.
This may not be much comfort, but I want you to know that I understand, and you are not alone.
Jeff
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version