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Author Topic: From God With Love  (Read 285 times)

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Wanda

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From God With Love
« on: November 29, 2017, 12:29:35 AM »

I wanted to share my testimony so others might know that God in all his infinate wisdom is guiding  you and giving  you the strength to get through the trials of your darkest days.

When you finally come to rest at the place beside the still waters you will be blessed in ways that could never be possible any other way.

First, I should begin by telling you  I've  spent most of my life worrying and trying to control situations, for myself as well as those I love. Even as a young child I had the weight of the world on my shoulders. being the oldest daughter, raised by a single mother who had seven children.  there were many hardships and sometimes even the  harsh reality that she might have to give us up because things had reached the breaking point for her. She was given to complete strangers herself when she was just 18 months old, so she fought with everything she had to keep that from happening to her children.

It wasn't possible for me to rely  or trust on God, because I did not know one true thing about hiim, as a result  I always felt like I was on the outside looking in, never feeling like I belonged anywhere or trusted easily.

For All My Controlling  and untrusting Ways...
I would be learning a valuable truth in a very harsh way.

I've experienced the loss of all but one of my siblings, starting back in December of 88 when my 36 year old brother killed himself. I truly believed that was the worst thing that could ever happen in my life, thats how bad the pain was. Then I lost my oldest brother to a brain Aneurysm 5 years later at the age of 46. Followed by my youngest brother 6 years later  at 49 from a blood clot to his heart  Then my youngest sister, almost 7 years later at 49 from a sepsis infection.  And last my middle sister 5 years later who at  65 died of cancer just five months ago.

And all the while I was battling failed marriage loss of my home, lost career,  savings, religion. Being shown all the evils of the world  and on and on, such is life.

I had been led to Gods truths just before everything went dark. To me that is the Devine Grace of my Lord. It was my Saving Grace through all of this.

We can get so caught up in a thing we can't see the forest for the trees. My trees were 9 months of caring for a sister with relentless ongoing psychosis, the sruff of nightmares.
Something that was a part of her life and ours for many years. Then the day finally came when I could see and feel the hand of God
directing things in such a way, she was finally helped  and came back to me.😃

We had almost 5 days of peace and even some happiness before she became very ill. There were hospital stays and tests and lots of pain and suffering. Finally, after five long months of begging everyone who was treating her, for pain meds to relieve her terrible pain,  which they would not do until she got a diagnoses; I was seriously considering going to the streets  to buy something , but for the Grace of God she was given her diagnoses.
For the first time in over five months her pain was under control, but she was given a death sentence and so was I.

I had spent so many years trying to save her from herself and those that were hurting her or might hurt  her,  and now it had come to this. She was going to die and suffer more than I could have ever imagined. There was nothing I could do to controll or prevent any of it.

I apologize this is so long but I used all the crayons in the box. 😁

Part 2 below



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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2017, 12:32:55 AM »

Part 2

All the months of living in total insanity and the months of physical suffering, that  followed,  would total nineteen months, and it  took me to the very edge of the cliff  and still I did not fall down on my knees and cry out to my Father above,  and confess I  was completely and  totally helpless without him.

Stubborn carnal thinking with the force of my righteous indignation...

at everyone including God.  If things could EVER get any worse, my sister would finally,  for the first time in her life, speak the horrors that happened to her all the way back to her earliest memories. Something I had prayed to know. Now I knew. Why did I want to know? what difference could it possibly make in her life after so many years? All it did was add to the long list of things that angered me. She was going to die and I was lost and hopeless.

Don't stop praying for something you consider important no matter how long it takes, all will be given at the very best time.

I wasn't going to actually share my sisters secret but finally decided, what happened to her was important for the testimoney, because her years of silence came at a heavy price and that is why God revealed it in the end.


One day I was reading her one of Rays papers when out of the blue and matter of factly,  she told me when she was sixteen, and on her way to her summer job, three black guys with a knife at her throat, forced her into a car. They took her to a place that had a wood shed, kept her there all day, rapeing her in every conceivable way imaginable, before they finally left her. She was alive but it would be a very hard life I assure you.

A few days later she told me our grandfather had molested her fom her earliest memory until she was nine. God! Just kill me now!!!

By bringing this into the light of day, God  was healing her of this terrible pain she had been burdened with all these years.. Allowing her to accept love and comfort from another human being. Which is something she could never allow herself. He gave her the gift of his truth at the moment she was ready to receive it. I know I was there. She died knowing he loved her and all of mankind and that the very best was yet to come.

For me, he gave memories to sustain me when she was gone. He gave me the answer to my prayer and helped me see and understand the why of it all. He gave me the opportunity to hold her, cry with her, and say all those things I would have said  those many years before,  if I had known. He gave me everything

GOD IS LOVE...This is the magnificent power of it.

His love is as real as the air you breath
He will wrap you in it and comfort you with his peace.

He restored my hope in his promise
My cup runneth over
His goodness and mercy are with me all the days of my life. I am truly home, where I do belong.

And durring these past five months I have been humbled, by the neccessary amount of chastisement , to teach me why I must rely on him for ALL things. Now that's a MIRACLE!

Don't you EVER worry about anything










« Last Edit: November 29, 2017, 06:18:47 AM by Wanda »
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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

virginiabm

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2017, 08:00:31 AM »

Oh Wanda, That is the most heartbreaking story that I have heard in awhile, but the most uplifting as well, because we can see the hand of God in it. The strenght and courage our Saviour gave to you to get through your pain and yes, the love of the Father wrapping you in His Loving arms.

May Our Heavenly Father continue to bless and keep you in His REST.

   Your sister in Christ Jesus,
        Virginia
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Doug

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2017, 09:10:57 AM »

Hi Wanda,

That is so sad the suffering your sister endured.

Your last statement don't worry about anything takes great faith.

Thank you for sharing.
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Musterseed

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2017, 10:20:58 AM »

Hello my friend,glad you are back and feeling stronger. Thankyou for your testimony.
We really  are nothing without Him and He will never fail us, He has an infinite supply
Of Love and Mercy. ❤️ Pamela
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" No man can come to me,except the Father draw him"
                                   (John 6: 44)

octoberose

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #5 on: November 30, 2017, 04:17:31 AM »

Thank you, thank you . I am waiting for God to work things out according to His  will . Your story of faith uplifts me.
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Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #6 on: November 30, 2017, 02:01:47 PM »

Oh Wanda, That is the most heartbreaking story that I have heard in awhile, but the most uplifting as well, because we can see the hand of God in it. The strenght and courage our Saviour gave to you to get through your pain and yes, the love of the Father wrapping you in His Loving arms.

May Our Heavenly Father continue to bless and keep you in His REST.

   Your sister in Christ Jesus,
        Virginia

Virginia,
Your sweet sensitive nature reminds me so much of my sister. Like you, she felt things so deeply. All the suffering in the world was almost unbearable for her.

She brought homeless people home with her many times and worked to get them off the street. I've seen her take her last dollar and by food for families in need. She would truly see the need and suffering, unlike so many of us who have grown almost complacent to it.

She had the Very Love Jesus commanded we have for one another. Even so, she had none for herself until the end of her human experience, when God made it so.

Thank you sweet sister☺

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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #7 on: November 30, 2017, 02:23:04 PM »

Hi Wanda,

That is so sad the suffering your sister endured.

Your last statement don't worry about anything takes great faith.

Thank you for sharing.

Yes she did Doug.
Those  first couple of months, here by myself,  that tormented me most. I cried out to God in anger many times.

See, this is the deeper meaning of who he is and when you get to see and feel it, there is no denying his complete sovereignty in all that you experience in and around you.

All of our experiences good and bad are for his Glory.

In the end, we were both the better for it, no matter how hard the journey had been, the landing was very smooth. ;)

Thank you Doug
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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #8 on: November 30, 2017, 02:42:20 PM »

Hello my friend,glad you are back and feeling stronger. Thankyou for your testimony.
We really  are nothing without Him and He will never fail us, He has an infinite supply
Of Love and Mercy. ❤️ Pamela

Hi dear sister,

I'm not just stronger, Im New and Improved  ;)

You can thank the Lord above, it's really his story I'm just sharing it. From God With Love💕
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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #9 on: November 30, 2017, 03:11:33 PM »

Thank you, thank you . I am waiting for God to work things out according to His  will . Your story of faith uplifts me.

Octoberose that makes my heart happy :)
Sharing this with other people is not something I would see myself doing, but out of the blue, I felt compelled to. I've experienced allot of that recently. Which I feel is Gods love, mercy and Grace in action. His timing is impeccable in all things.

Thank you Octoberose
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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #10 on: November 30, 2017, 03:43:41 PM »

This is an example of the kind of experiences I've been having...

I was very much troubled by something concerning God, and I couldn't find rest in it. And then, quiet suddeny these words came to me...

You're the song. Of my heart
The dance of my joy
The contentment of my soul

You are the love of my need
strength of my fear
knowledge of my doubt

You're the conforter of my brockeness
The light of my darkness

You are ALL in ALL
And I am filled with enough

I found my rest, this was all I really needed.

I see with different eyes and hear with different ears. Everything within me is new.

God is Love!



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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12

Wanda

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Re: From God With Love
« Reply #11 on: December 04, 2017, 05:35:53 PM »

I want to add this, because I think anytime we pass up an opportunity to praise the Mighty Glory of our God and Father, we are loosing BIG!

The encouragement, hope and comfort to our brothers and sisters,  is one of the ways we can follow Christ and keep his commandment to love one another.

Not to mention, I'm really on fire to do. Symbolically of course.  :D

These are changes I've experienced from this painfully long and relentless process...

I have peace for the first time in my life. I am truly content.

Romans 15:13

13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

I have love in my heart for ALL.

Before God allowed me to see, I was in fear of the world at large, and justified my own hate.

John 15:9-13New International Version (NIV)

9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. 11 I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

I have learned the true gift of patients, which allieviates much stress and unhappiness.

Corinthians 13:4-5English Standard Version (ESV)

4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;[a]

Most importantly, I have learned to trust, which has been the most profound change within me. Giving up controll was a hard thing to overcome for a  complete controll freak, such as myself. Fear will do that to a person.

My trust in God has allowed me the miracle of relying on him for EVERYTHING trusting him,  in ALL.  What greater MERCY is there?

God says, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness” (Jeremiah 31:3).

the Lord delights in those who fear [reverence] him, who put their hope in his unfailing love” (Psalms 147:11).

“…the Lord watches over those who fear him, those who rely on his unfailing love.” (Psalms 33:18)

God wants and needs us to trust him enough to know he will always do the right thing for us.  It's the gift of his loving kindness,  to each and everyone of us. He knows we need peace of mind to get through this physical experience.

John 14:27 ...

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

God changes lives...I saw that on a bumper sticker, and can honestly say I didn't know or feel this in my life.  Now I get it. I wonder if the person who was sharing, really knew just how or how much he can change lives.





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I am the Light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but have the light of life.
                                     John 8:12
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