Hello,
My name is Mary Ann and this is my testimony. Born into a middle class family I was raised by my mother and father along with my two brothers. Had my first child at 17 and married at 21. I became totally obsessed with financial success, chasing it with all my heart knowing that financial success was necessary to achieve happiness. By the age of 32 I was earning a six figure income I had obtained my dream. It occurred to me that I was not happy at all, in fact I was more miserable then I had ever been. I now came to the realization that it was love that I was missing. I divorced my childhood sweet heart. Married a man who was also making 6 figures, we had it all love, money the ability to do what ever we wanted when ever we wanted. Ferrari parked in the garage along with the Mercedes. We were the awe of all we new. I'm not saying this to brag we were netting over 500,000 a year that is minus taxes. I'm saying this for any one who doesn't know... money doesn't make you happy. Guess what? I once again found myself miserable. We had started using drugs, cocaine and heroin. It took us 6 years to loose everything we worked a life time to have. Not only did we loose all that we had we also developed serious legal issues my husband spent 2 years incarcerated and I did 8 months. The good news is that somewhere in the midst of all this I cried out to God. I dislike when people say when you have nothing else to turn to you turn to God. In my case it was the opposite. When I realized that I was chasing an empty dream, that the money and the love did not equal happiness and there was nothing else to hope for I just wanted to check out. That was the scariest thing I ever went through. But God saved the day, I cried out to Him and he sent his workers. A woman that worked for me stuck her head in my office I asked her where she was going she said to read my bible. I followed her like a magnet. God used TV and Christian preaching over the radio to begin His work in me.I have been a born again christian 7 years now. I love the brethren, they love the lord and they gave me all they had. HOWEVER I always new their was something different about me. The Lord put a strong desire in my heart to read his word. It was as if I was possessed. I did not know what was happening to me but I knew it was bigger than me and it was not of me. I can remember hearing someone on the radio say you must love the Lord. I was laughing thinking these people are going a little to far, how can I love something I can not see, touch or feel. Anyway for the next 3 years I studied the word with an intense passion. I taught myself, I repented and I was beginning to know the Lord at this point I said to the Lord I have been walking with you for the past 3 years doing all that you have asked of me and I'm not even sure if you really exist. If this is the way it's going to be I think I'll be on my way. Maybe a month or so later It hit me. I had an abundance of peace,,joy and love I was loosing everything I owned and I was walking through the mess with a smile on my face. I knew I had found something so much better and I knew all would be well.I knew that I knew that I knew He was real.He stole my heart he robbed me blind. My experience with main stream Christianity was pleasant for the most part but again I always had a strong sense that something was wrong. I was attending a Pentecostal church. I would never judge them because I knew they loved the lord, but there were many teachings that were not scriptural and as Ray say's I could prove it. I left that church and found myself involved in another Pentecostal church "boy can they praise the Lord" I again was feeling so uncomfortable and for the last year I have been praying to the Lord to show me what church I belong in. I finally said Lord I don't have a clue and I am not going anywhere. If you want me out you are going to have to give me a Damascus experience so when the time comes I will know that it is you who leads. The rest is history. I discovered Ray's sight about 3 weeks ago It seems it all finally makes sense.
I'm happy to say that I have been clean for almost 3 years now. I have not been financially restored to the position I once held, I'm far from it but I live in a nice house and am quite comfortable and above all things I trust in the Lord, I love Him with all my heart and all my soul. I have surrendered my life into his hands. Father your will not mine.
That's my story. I could really use some christian Friends in agreement with what I believe. All my other friends rebuke me and tell me I am in serious danger of Hell fire I love them but things are different now. I live in NJ so if there is anyone out there who needs a Friend give me a holler I've been asking God for sometime now to give me just a few real christian freinds lets hope this is it. I long for my spiritual family.
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Topic: Introduction I'm a newbie (Read 6375 times)