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forgiveness

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mongoose:
Sandy's post on another thread brought a question I have to mind...but I didn't want to hijack her thread so I'm starting a new one.

I can see how you can forgive (or try to forgive) people who you currently know or who you remember really well.  And in some ways I can see where one could feel that they were making progress towards forgiving someone based on the current attitude you have towards this person.

My question is this: what about someone who you barely remember and won't ever see?  There is a guy from my very distant past who hurt me a lot in very bad ways.  But, I'm not sure how to forgive him or if I have or need to or what.  It's all very confusing.  He seems vague in my memory, like I'm not totally sure he's real (he was but what I mean is that I feel no emotion at all connected to him or my memories of these events).  So, this perplexes me.  Have I forgiven him or begun to?  I don't know and I have no idea how to tell.

Is this weird?  Any suggestions or advice?

mongoose

Deborah-Leigh:
Hi mongoose

for me the carnal mind plays exactly these kind of tricks on us. Have I, haven't I?,,,,,,tricks.....

Talk to Jesus. He hears your thoughts and tell Him you release this person into His hands and ask Jesus to heal your concerns, doubts and memories......thats what I do....It helps me and when my mind tells me I have not forgiven, then I have Christ as my witness who says otherwise and I trust Jesus to keep healing me.....It is a process....for me anyway!

Hope this helps

Arcturus

Deborah-Leigh:
Hi again Mongoose

Also I think we should not confuse forgiveness with the healing of our wounds. Jesus forgave at the cross and died of the wounds. .....we have to do the same not in a pity party way or a feel sorry for me mind set...not that you suggest such a thing but from my own pain I realize that I am living with pain and wounds inflicted on me long past I have forgiven the persons who have hurt me.....I know only Jesus can heal and set me free in His time....and I accept that it is difficult for us all but it is worth while to learn endurance, patience and long-suffering.....in peace and trust....

Hope this helps

Arcturus

MG:
edited

vneverov:
I understand forgiveness as a way of understanding.  When we understand why someone does something evil, then we can't really hold anything against that one person.  For the ultimate reason lying behind every evil deed is sin.  Since people do not have free will and make decisions based on certain things that have happened to them, then we must understand why a person commits such horrible acts such as rape, murder, assault etc.  We must remember these people don't know any better, their acts are the result of their sad life.  I think that was why Jesus was so forgiving.  He knew that the sinners he conversed with had no say in being the way they were; rather it was because of their life's circumstance that they turned out this way.  Jesus understood everyone, even the Pharisees, which was why he knew what they were thinking all the time.  Hence, when Jesus died on the cross his ability to forgive was not some miraculous deed sent from above, rather a result of His logic and understanding.  He knew exactly why He was dying and why these people were killing him.  And in my life I find myself forgiving others without even thinking about it, just because I know exactly why they did what they did.  Understanding someone isn’t hard once all circumstances are considered i.e. lack of free will.  So, you don’t really have to remember the person to understand he must have done something evil simply because he is a prisoner in this world…But we are free!!!!!   ;D  Our freedom is from uncertainty, from guilt, from doubts…. You must not let doubt make you think that you have not yet forgiven someone, just think about it logically and you just might find that there is no need to look for some sort of phenomenal sign of forgiveness.  It’s all in your understanding of the world and its sin.

Christ be with you,
Viktoriya

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