Feline Physics Laws

[hillsbororiver]

Feline Physics Laws


Law of Cat Inertia

A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

Law of Cat Motion

A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

Law of Cat Magnetism

All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric.

Law of Cat Thermodynamics

Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in which case all heat flows to the cat.

Law of Cat Stretching

A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just taken.

Law of Cat Sleeping

All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved, and as comfortable as possible for the cat.

Law of Cat Elongation

A cat can make her body long enough to reach just about any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it.

Law of Cat Obstruction

A cat must lay on the floor in such a position to obstruct the maximum amount of human foot traffic.

Law of Cat Acceleration

A cat will accelerate at a constant rate, until he gets good and ready to stop.

Law of Dinner Table Attendance

Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served.

Law of Rug Configuration

No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.

Law of Obedience Resistance

A cat's resistance varies in proportion to a human's desire for her to do something.

First Law of Energy Conservation

Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

Second Law of Energy Conservation

Cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.

Law of Refrigerator Observation

If a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.

Law of Electric Blanket Attraction

Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will jump into bed at the speed of light.

Law of Random Comfort Seeking

A cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in any given room.

Law of Bag/Box Occupancy

All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

Law of Cat Embarrassment

A cat's irritation rises in direct proportion to her embarrassment times the amount of human laughter.

Law of Milk Consumption

A cat will drink his weight in milk, squared, just to show you he can.

Law of Furniture Replacement

A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

Law of Cat Landing

A cat will always land in the softest place possible; often the mid- section of an unsuspecting, reclining human.

Law of Fluid Displacement

A cat immersed in milk will displace her own volume, minus the amount of milk consumed.

Law of Cat Disinterest

A cat's interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to interest him.

Law of Pill Rejection

Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.

Law of Cat Composition

A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.

[gmik]

Ha So True

SandyFla you will love this!!!

[rvhill]

You forgot the law of feline attraction to humans.

a Cat attraction to a person is in direct proportion to said person allergic reaction to felines.

[hillsbororiver]

You forgot the law of feline attraction to humans.

a Cat attraction to a person is in direct proportion to said person allergic reaction to felines.

That is great! Like I said before (in another thread) the best humor has the ring of truth to it.

Thanks rv,

Joe

[joyful1]

The configuration and speed of a cat's running pattern between the moving legs of a human being....is in direct proportion to the size and weight of the human that they are trying to trip. 

[hillsbororiver]

Lol, so true Joyce, I experience that law every morning as I head downstairs to make coffee and feed our 2 cats, as soon as I start down the stairs they are racing with each other not only down the stairs but underfoot, they seem to think the closer they stay near me the faster they will get their food. It is at that time of day they resemble a feline whirlwind until of course the feeding dishes are in place.

Here are some interesting physiology facts about our cat buddies;


Both humans and cats have identical regions in the brain responsible for emotion.
A cat's brain is more similar to a man's brain than that of a dog.
A cat has more bones than a human; humans have 206, but the cat has 230 (some cites list 245 bones, and state that bones may fuse together as the cat ages).
Cats have 30 vertebrae--15 more than humans have.
Cats do not have a collarbone, so they can fit through any opening the size of their head.
The cat has 500 skeletal muscles (humans have 650).
Cats have 32 muscles that control the outer ear (compared to human's 6 muscles each). A cat can rotate its ears independently 180 degrees, and can turn in the direction of sound 10 times faster than those of the best watchdog.
Cats' hearing is much more sensitive than humans and dogs.
Cats' hearing stops at 65 khz (kilohertz); humans' hearing stops at 20 khz.
In relation to their body size, cats have the largest eyes of any mammal.
Most cats do not have eyelashes.
A cat sees about 6 times better than a human at night, and needs 1/6 the amount of of light that a human does - it has a layer of extra reflecting cells which absorb light.
Recent studies have shown that cats can see blue and green. There is disagreement as to whether they can see red.
A cat's field of vision is about 185 degrees.
Blue-eyed, pure white cats are frequently deaf.

It may take as long as 2 weeks for a kitten to be able to hear well.  Their eyes usually open between 7 and 10 days, but sometimes it happens in as little as 2 days.
A cat has approximately 60 to 80 million olfactory cells (a human has between 5 and 20 million).
Cats have a special scent organ located in the roof of their mouth, called the Jacobson's organ. It analyzes smells - and is the reason why you will sometimes see your cat "sneer" when they encounter a strong odor.
A cat has a total of 24 whiskers, 4 rows of whiskers on each side. The upper two rows can move independently of the bottom two rows. A cat uses its whiskers for measuring distances.
Cats have 30 teeth (12 incisors, 10 premolars, 4 canines, and 4 molars), while dogs have 42. Kittens have baby teeth, which are replaced by permanent teeth around the age of 7 months.
When a cat drinks, its tongue - which has tiny barbs on it - scoops the liquid up backwards.
Cats purr at the same frequency as an idling diesel engine, about 26 cycles per second.
Domestic cats purr both when inhaling and when exhaling.
The cat's front paw has 5 toes, but the back paws have 4. Some cats are born with as many as 7 front toes and extra back toes (polydactl).
Cats step with both left legs, then both right legs when they walk or run.
Cats walk on their toes.
A domestic cat can sprint at about 31 miles per hour.
The heaviest cat on record weighed 46 lbs.
A kitten will typically weigh about 3 ounces at birth.  The typical male housecat will weigh between  7 and 9 pounds, slightly less for female housecats.
Cats take between 20-40 breaths per minute.
Normal body temperature for a cat is 102 degrees F.
A cat's normal pulse is 140-240 beats per minute, with an average of 195.
Cat's urine glows under a black light.
Cats lose almost as much fluid in the saliva while grooming themselves as they do through urination.
Almost 10% of a cat's bones are in its tail, and the tail is used to maintain balance.
The domestic cat is the only species able to hold its tail vertically while walking. You can also learn about your cat's present state of mind by observing the posture of his tail.
If a cat is frightened, the hair stands up fairly evenly all over the body; when the cat threatens or is ready to attack, the hair stands up only in a narrow band along the spine and tail.

[Patrick]

I witness the cat using it's tail for balance nearly every day. I live in the desert foothills north of Phoenix; lots of critters roaming around. Coyote's, bobcats, javelina, fox, rattlesnakes, etc..
My cat knows when these visitors are on the property. She can be sound asleep, jump up and run to the window. She will stand up and balance on her tail, just like the squirrels (lots of ground squirrels here also), and look out the window.
She will also bring me presents, usually a lizard (less part of it's tail). She does not eat them; just brings them in the house, chases it around, and then gets bored when it won't play anymore.
Never a dull moment around here.
 

[chuckusa]

Hi all,

I bet you didn't know that cats can fly.

When I was little, our house took a direct hit from a tornado. The huge pressure change that occured caused all of the windows to be broken out, and the entire contents of the house tried to exit via the windows.

One of the things that "exited" was my cat named tiger, a stray that we had found with long yellow stripes. He was sucked out of the bedroom window and up into the sky. At that moment, although disturbed by this, I was sidetracked as the roof started to come off, and the rain started to come in. It's very odd for it to be raining in your bedroom at 3 am.

Anyway, later while I was sitiing in a part of the house that was intact, I heard a noise behind me, and looking around saw tiger standing behind me, doing one of those loooong stretches. I was amazed to say the least. The other two were never found.

That cat never was the same after that, and one day just walked off and never came back.

Well thats the only cat story I have...Tiger, the famous flying cat.

Chuck

[SandyFla]

Ha So True

SandyFla you will love this!!!

LOL, yep! I've seen these before, and they are soooo true! Especially the Law of Cat Obstruction: "A cat must lay on the floor in such a position to obstruct the maximum amount of human foot traffic."

I can't tell you how many times I've nearly tripped over a cat who was "there first"!

Sandy

[gmik]

I had a dog and a cat  for a couple of years. Both  gotten at the same time so they were all like brothers.  When our dog had to be put to sleep (for kidney disease) our cat  got out of the house and left us-we never saw him again!!  Why would he do that??

A couple years later our son brought his 2 cats home from college and all lived with us for a while, then he gave 1 away to afriend, and sure enough, soon the other one escaped and never returned!

Now we just have a dog.  I love cats but don't have any now.

gena

[hillsbororiver]

Gena,

That is interesting, do you suppose the cats that left and did not return were out on a journey in search of their missing mates?

I had cats as a very young boy and then it was all dogs, from 15 to my late 40's a few years back we were adopted by a young, scrawny ferrel cat who within 6 months blessed us with a 4 kitten litter, we ended up keeping the runt of the litter (a female who is now 12 lb.) and giving the other 3 away to friends and family. "Dotty" the mom, is like a dog in the way she follows me around and always comes when I call her, Angel, the younger one is a more traditional cat, she does what she wants and when.

They are very interesting, complex creatures sometimes I love to just be still and observe them as they interact with their surroundings and each other.

Joe