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Raising children

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JDH:
I have had trouble figuring out how to raise my son in a christian environment.  More to the point, I was raised in church and I know that at least one of the advantages of growing up in the church is being around christians.  Now I might not believe everything they believe, but they did believe in Jesus and it was good to have that fellowship.  Now that I have came to believe that the church is wrong in many of things that they preach, namely the hellfire and brimstone stuff, I can't attend church without thinking "These teaching are completely wrong."  So what I struggle with is whether or not I take my son to church? I want him to have that fellowship with young christians, but I don't want him to have the false beliefs that are taught in church.  Any ideas?

JJ:
No ideas, but have same situation and now that the last 2 girls are teens,
it matters, but at least they have each other.   I still let 15 yr old go to
a youth group, because I know the leaders and it is safe enviroment.
She has some very good friends that are not hyper-religous, but very
clean-cut.  Being homeschooled, she is already very unhappy to not
be with people much.  I wouldn't do S.S. or Bible studies, but socializing
w/  moral kids........ better alternative than worldly kids, or locking them
in a cage!! 

They still have to make up their own mind what they will believe.
Really tough to change beliefs mid-life - hard for them to grasp what is right.
Life doesn't have set rules, but I do know God has a plan.  That is my only
peace that God's will, will be accomplished, through me or despite me.
JJ

Chris R:
Hello,

We should be a example for our children, we have all heard the phrase "i'd rather see a sermon rather than hear one". this holds true for our children as well. be prepared to answer their questions, they will have many.

Chris R

Kat:

Hi JDH and JJ,

It is a struggle we face constantly, what is best for our children.
I have home schooled 3 girls, the first 2 never attended in a school,
the youngest (17) is in high school now. 
 
There was a home school group that met monthly,
and the girls made friends there.
But I did bring them up in church,
because I felt they should be 'socializing w/ moral kids'.
I had a very close relationship with my girls,
and I can tell you churched kids are not always moral.
They did make friends there,
but there was unfortunate things that did happen there too.
With what I know now, I would not take them to church.
They do teach about Jesus,
but there is so much wrong teachings mixed in,
it would be a continuing battle to correct it all.
God is leading you in the truth that the church has no clue about,
you would be a much better teacher for your children.

Deu 6:6  Keep these words, which I say to you this day, deep in your hearts;
Deu 6:7  Teaching them to your children with all care, talking of them when you are at rest in your house or walking by the way, when you go to sleep and when you get up.
Deu 6:8  Let them be fixed as a sign on your hand, and marked on your brow;

We have to pray without ceasing that God will provide us with what our children need.

1Th 5:16  Rejoice always,
1Th 5:17  pray without ceasing,
1Th 5:18  give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Homeschooling in not for everybody, but I do not regret it in the least.
Socialization is not as important is it is made out to be,
but seeking ways that they can be around other kids is good.
Hope this helped, I'll pray for your strength and courage in this.

mercy, peace, and love
Kat

JJ:
Yes, Kat, I always believed and lived that:  socialization is not as important as world says--
the family is enough, with a little on the side..... but one of my teens is more social.... and
her best friend, her sister, just left for college, leaving the 15 yr. hurting and lonely--
very depressed at times. 

If you don't "do church"-- something we have never done-- and most of the homeschooled
kids are VERY churchy and don't do kids that don't do church........  leaves a teen with NO
opportunity for friends or teens...... but like i said there are a few kids that are balanced--
not hyper-religious but moral and mature...... so allowing a night a week to see friends
at youth group is not taboo..... no more than sending kids to school is taboo--- but it is
confusing when you have to avoid church, but don't want to let your kids join in on the
world's social life........ it works for me, but teens have to have a life as they approach
adulthood.   Again,  God  will work it all out -  have to trust.  thanks for sharing your
experience-- it can get lonely out here-- homeschooled but not  "churched".
jj

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