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[brothertoall]

Well today I got my test result and I passed. The bad news is I did not place in the top 3 so I will not be promoted.

 I will be honest with you all and I am really hurt by this and can not help but feel that God just does not seem to do good for me but those that don't follow him seem to get everything and everything goes their way.

 I could sure use your prayers. I really do not think I can go any longer. I want so badly to understand why. He promised that he would give us life and to give it more abundantly but I feel that only applys to a few. This really hurts and it seems that His will for my life is so painful at times.

bobby

[longhorn]

Bobby, It sounds more and more to me like you are one of the VERY FEW Chosen of God.  He promised us it would be a tough and painful road, and ONLY those that endure till the end would reign with Christ in his Kingdom.  Dang you are lucky.

Love in Christ

Longhorn

[eggi]

Hi brothertoall,

I understand your disappointment, who cannot? You said it very well:

[...] but those that don't follow him seem to get everything and everything goes their way.

In the next days, meditate upon the following verse, it has helped me too in the last time:

A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked. (Psa 37:16 KJV)

God bless you and keep you,
Eirik

[joyful1]

Cheer up brother....
all this "stuff" is passing away!
but you have access to the throne!

Joyce

[Craig]

Bob,

I know it is tough where you are now.

I posted an email from Ray this morning that you might need right now,..Titled "Good News?"

Craig

[Deborah-Leigh]

Hi

He will neither leave nor forsake you....He will train your eyes on HIM and He will test your heart.

The words from Eggi are so true and the words of wisdom from Longhorn who sees your calling I second... even as you are blinded by disappointment temporarily.  You are being trained in endurance.  This is a virtue of strength and of power trained through adversity, disappointment and suffering. You are in the process of being trained for a much worthier position and one that the world does not have to offer you but one that the Kingdom of God does. Rejoyce. You have proof of training and many who desire to see you succeed in the Kingdom!

He is leading you.

Hope you have regained your sence of peace.....

Arcturus

[ned]

Dear Bobby,

You are in my prayers, brother.

Love,
Marie

[Andy_MI]

I'm praying for you too brother.

Keep on going.

We learn obedience through suffering just as Christ did also.

Heb 5:7-10 CLV
(7)  Who, in the days of His flesh, offering both petitions and supplications with strong clamor and tears to Him Who is able to save Him out of death, being hearkened to also for His piety,
(8 even He also, being a Son, learned obedience from that which He suffered."
(9)  And being perfected, He became the cause of eonian salvation to all who are obeying Him,
(10)  being accosted by God "Chief Priest according to the order of Melchizedek,


Peace,

Andy

[JJ]

Dearest Bobby,

What great words and scripture from all our friends here!  Thank you folks!

I'm where you are-- seems like God is holding back good/justice--
giving  lots of injustice and trials.  It is frustrating, it hurts, so hard to
endure and keep faith, but when God is working us over,
it is for the purpose of taking away our desires for this life
and flesh and giving us the single focus on Him and our
glorious life with Him forever.   This does not happen
easily, nor painlessly, nor w/o suffering and loss....... we
have to have pain, suffering, trials, injustice, humiliations.......
to experience, in order for us to learn total obedience and to
rid us of our carnal flesh......... seems a bummer, but THINK
on the future!   What will this short life of disappointment and
suffering compare to reigning with Christ!   WOW!  Are we
willing to forfiet our lives-our dreams-our rights?? Are we
willling to suffer defeat, disappointment, injustice, loss???
All for the goal of letting God mold us into a vessel of honor to Himself?

We are, you are.......... it just hurts and we falter and stomp our feet and
shed tears of disappointment.......  I do this...... but God is working...... in me and
in you--- we are hurting for you, but  we all know that in your pain, God has
BIG things in store for your future-- things that outshine ANYTHING this earth
life could give!   Christ lowered Himself-- He did NOT get the honor or justice
that He deserved on this earth.  Christ forfieted His life because He wanted His Father's will
more than His own-- it hurt Him---BUT He knew it was for a more glorious purpose
that overcame the horrible time of pain and trial........  we must think as He thought.......

be cheerful with what God has chosen for us........  I go off to work today in similar
situation as you--- faithful and in perpetual motion and devotion to my employer-- they speak
appreciation, but there seems no justice-- the slackers get more than I -- it is a
constant disappointment and frustration-- and layer by layer, lessons in patience
and obedience-- I fail in attitude-- learn and fail again-- but God is teaching me
by the suffering and #$%& it all--- grit my teeth and I am determined to trudge on--
and reach for Him and His will, inspite of the physical suffering, the humiliation and
loss---   God has got a grip on your life, Bobby.   We hurt with you, but you will continue
on with Him, for He wants you.  WOW!!!!  What an honor to beat all other promotions!
The hope of being a Son of God-- reigning and ruling with Christ!!  Grieve, but trust God's
sovereign control and love in you life.  (I say all this to myself as well!)
JJ

[chuckt]

Well today I got my test result and I passed. The bad news is I did not place in the top 3 so I will not be promoted.

 I will be honest with you all and I am really hurt by this and can not help but feel that God just does not seem to do good for me but those that don't follow him seem to get everything and everything goes their way.

 I could sure use your prayers. I really do not think I can go any longer. I want so badly to understand why. He promised that he would give us life and to give it more abundantly but I feel that only applys to a few. This really hurts and it seems that His will for my life is so painful at times.

bobby

ah bobby, be of good cheer, i know its eay for me to say that, but remember we live in real time God is working something out, patience bro.


but when one suffers we all suffer so im there with ya!!


my  hope and prayer is  peace of mind and heart for ya dear one.


grace  and love to ya
 chuckt

[gmik]

Dang.  I wish you would have gotten that promotion.  I was sure you would.  But what do I know???  Nothing.  That wasn't the path chosen for you, but who knows what is around the next bend....Jesus does.

I can't add to all the great posts so far but it has helped me reading them and getting reminded.  The ebb & flow of Life.

i admit I do get envious of those "unbelievers" who are rich and seemingly carefree.  I almost think it sin and prevents me from blessings.

Bobby you know the scripture as well as anyone here.  You know what to do.  And you will, you love God too much.  We love you and you are most definetly being prayed for.

gena

[Deborah-Leigh]

I liked that Gena.....ignorance is bliss

Bobby I hope you are feeling better. The way I see it is that your faith was put through a very tough test.

Hope you are doing better now. Any word from Jennie yet?

Peace to you.

Arcturus

[brothertoall]

You guys are the best friends I could ever hope or imagine to ever be blessed with!! You all just do not know how much your love for me means to me.

 I will be honest and say this is a hard time for me.

 When I return to work on Monday i am going to the guy that came in first on the exam and congradulate him( even though he does not want the job and there is a long story there).

 Thank you all for your prayers and your concern and most of all for your unfailing love. I just hope I can give you all back 100 times over the blessing you are to me and thank God for all of you.

bobby

[Deborah-Leigh]

That is awesome Bobby!


When I return to work on Monday i am going to the guy that came in first on the exam and congradulate him( even though he does not want the job  and there is a long story there).


That is evidence of faith proven and love outpoured! God continue to bless you and us through you.

Peace and His love to you brother

Arcturus

[JJ]

What a blessing to know that you, Bobby, are turning this trial into opportunity to glorify God.

This experience of yours and similar in my life has motivated me to strive to respond to all
things in my life as if I ACTUALLY believe that God is both loving and sovereign.  We recently
shared about how God's sovereignty has affected our life.  In knowing w/ my head that God
IS indeed in control of ALL things and believing w/o any doubt that He is LOVE, I am compelled
to align my actions to these facts.   It builds my faith and gives peace.  For I would want no other
thing but what my loving Father would want for me.   The challenge:  live this in the face of
disappointment and loss and pain.   Exciting to see how God can work this in my life!   I sure can't
make it happen, but I can agree w/ Him and ask Him to take my life and mold it.   

Bobby, your pain and disappointment are real and we feel for you still, but see the beginning of
good and growth that God can work from it all?    Praying that you will rest in Him and He will
work through you on Monday.    Jayle

[brothertoall]

Thank you Jayle.

 Yes I am going to meet with the guy who  came in first. He really does not want the job but he is favored as the one they will pick. Again this is all up to God's will and this person may take his name off the list. If he does then again I could possibly be eligable for the promotion again.

 I can not understand why God is making this so hard! This whole ordeal has been going on for months and my stomach has been tied up in knots the whole time. I haven't had a descent nights sleep since I can't rmember when.

 I really apreciate all your prayers and tomorrow morning is going to be one of the hardest things for me to do and have to face all those people that thought I was a shoe in for that job. Talk about a hubbling experience!!!


bobby

[Deborah-Leigh]

Hi Bobby

How did things go?.....

Peace to you

Arcturus

[brothertoall]

I did what I said I was going to do. That man has now decided that he wants the job so it is finished. I do not feel good about this at all and cannot help but feel God has let me down.

 Everyone here at work shuns me like I have the plague and that is not easy. The ones in my department who I thought were my friends seem to be taking pleasure in all this and it really hurts.

 I have a big decision to make concerning my employment here and I guess I am pretty much on my own. God is going to have His way regardless and there is nothing I can do to change that.

 I honestly do feel like a robot when it comes to God's will and I am seriously starting to doubt my faith.

 I know this post sounds very negative but I am just being honest. I never was a good pretender!

bobby

[Deborah-Leigh]

What a knock down drag out ….a knock down….drag out…..

I am glad you are connected to what you are thinking and feeling. I am glad that you can share what your thoughts are in this trial you are going through.

I believe that what you are expressing is exactly how you are feeling. I believe that you are doubting your faith as you say you are.

If I can very gently, I hope….just tell you….if your faith doesn’t hold up (which I believe it will) but to address your fear…to address what you fear happening, that being that your faith will not stand up to this trial….then Okay…give your faith into the hands who has stood the trial of death….to take care of while you yield under the strain of self doubt and pain and suffering. Rejection, being shunned and outcast is exactly what Christ endured and it took Him to His death! You are sharing in His sufferings Bobby!

I know the pain of being fearful of keeping my faith. When this happened to me, Jesus arranged that I could  agreed with another sibling in Christ to hand over my faith to Christ while I went to pieces.   It was such a blessing to release everything precious into His hands for His care and His protection....and then fall apart into the potters hands, in absolute dust particles! I only knew this in hindsight. In the moment everything looks hopeless and bleak!

Once  through my trial, my faith was returned to me twice increased. …I know who will  keep your faith for you unharmed and perfect in His care. Jesus. Because He cares about you. We all care about you and we all trust Jesus with you too……

It is Okay that you are feeling knocked down and dragged out because you are knocked down and you are dragged out but… you will be lifted up and you will be set on high……I believe it. I will believe it for you as I am sure others will do  for you to, if Christ through this trial give you knowledge of human weakness which is beyond our carnal comprehension. If that pain is where He is leading you, then yield…even if you forget or loose sight through your pain. …He does not take His eyes off you because you are His.

Compassion towards you dear Bobby.

Peace to you

Arcturus

[JJ]

Bobby,

Wish you weren't suffering so much, but like labor pains, you must go through this
and i strongly believe it will produce a beautiful result!   God has a plan and purpose
and with your head, you must know this.  Somewhere deep inside, can you tuck tail
in humilation and defeat and lonliness -- (i acknowledge your pain is real!)  but also,
can you tell God you believe that He is in control and that He is love?  Therefore,
can you conclude that this experience MUST be as it is and that it is not over yet?
This may motivate you to move on to something even better or it may just leave you
in a state where you clling to God until He has taught you a deeper level of trust and
you then can rejoice in the trial, seeing that it produced rich spiritual things. 

Maybe, it is too soon in this loss to be saying these things to you.......... like telling
a widow a week after the death of her husband that she will be okay and love again.
If so, please forgive me and read this again later when you are ready to hear it.  I mean
you know hurt..... I KNOW you have experienced an injustice/suffering/humiliation/great
loss and disappointment.   It is real, your pain is real....... but then,  only REAL pain
 produces growth.   I can feel the growth for you that is going to result from this trial.
And I have and will again be exactly where you are in your response to disappointment.

This is how i talk myself out of a downward spiral:

Life has disappointed me repeatedly to the point that i feel buried and hopeless.
But by learning of and totally believing in God's soverneignty and His faithful love for His
creation-- even me -- He has placed a faith and hope within me that allows me to
"ride" out the pain and suffering........ to barely hang on at times, at times to be numb to
the "facts" that I see in my life and have patience that it will not always be so, and at other
times, to just rejoice in the hardship, knowing that there is SOOO much more to this life
than the things you can touch and see --  and God makes me rise above the earthly
things-- accept the losses, knowing that being WITH Him is more precious than ANY
success or comfort on earth....... AND we can NOT gain Life/CHRIST  WITHOUT
suffering and loss and humiliations!   It just doesn't work that way........ 

I ask myself:
Can you yield to God's will for your life?  Do you trust Him?  Do you believe that He
knows more about your future and needs than you do?  Do you believe He has the
power to accomplish ANYTHING that is necessary?   Do you want His will, no matter
how painful it "feels" at the present?  Do you have the vision for the internal/spiritual
growth that God is able to produce through this trial? 

Sorry, i do have LOTS of feelings, but tend to be coldly analytical.  God has impressed the FACTS
on my mind.   If i choose to not believe or not submit, then i am taking on a mighty power and putting
myself on the throne and it will never result in better things for me.  If i choose to submit to His will, no matter
what the trial,  i have a chance of being one with Him........ that is so desirious!   Honestly,
if i decide to stubbornly believe that God did me wrong and i deserve/want better,  i am
in rebellion and proving that i haven't yet learned the most important lesson concerning
my beasthood and God's awesome perfection and power.   
    so........ even in pain and disappointment, it makes it easier to
submit and next step is rejoicing in faith that God's will is best ...........  you will get there,
I know you will.   Abandon yourself, crumpled, into the arms of our mighty, perfectly loving
Father and let Him turn your doubts and fears into faith and joy.  He can do this.  It is a
beautiful thing when He does and I know you have already experienced it in life-- do it again.

This certainly could not be a harder trial than the other ones that you have experienced and
shared with us.   We are pulling and praying for you, friend.   We need each other to keep
our chins up as we face the refining process.   
jayle