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Funny But True Insurance Claims

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hillsbororiver:
 

The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers have attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest possible words:


"Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."


"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."


"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way."


"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face."


"A pedestrian hit me and went under the car."


"The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."


"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment."


"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."


"I had been driving for 40 years, when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident."


"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."


"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident."


"As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared in place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident."


"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian."


"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car, and vanished."


"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."


"I told police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, I found that I had fractured my skull."


"I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him."


"The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him."


"I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."


"The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth."

 

John9362:
Hey Joe,
I wasn't sure if I should laugh at all of them or or not.........OK I confess I LOL !!  ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D

Cheers...John 9362

John9362:
OK Joe It's your turn to shake your head in disbelief................enjoy.

Doug Baker, 45, of Portland, Ore. Baker says God "steered" him to a stray dog. He admits "People thought I was crazy" to spend $4,000 in vet bills to bring the injured mutt back to health, but hey, it was God's dog! But $4,000 was nothing: he couldn't even take his girlfriend out to dinner without getting a dog-sitter to watch him. When the skittish dog escaped the sitter, Baker didn't just put an ad in the paper, he bought display ads so he could include a photo. His business collapsed since he devoted full time to the search for the dog. He didn't propose to his girlfriend because he wanted the dog to deliver the ring to her. He hired four "animal psychics" to give him clues to the animal's whereabouts, and hired a witch to cast spells. He even spread his own urine around to "mark his territory" to try to lure the dog home! And, he said, he cried every day. Two months in to the search, he went looking for the dog where it got lost -- and quickly found it. His first task: he put a collar on the mutt. (He hadn't done that before for a dog that was so "valuable"?!) After finding the dog, he sued the dog sitter, demanding $20,000 for the cost of his search, $30,000 for the income he lost by letting his business collapse, $10,000 for "the temporary loss of the special value" of the dog, and $100,000 in "emotional damages" -- $160,000 total. God has not been named as a defendant.

Cheers....... John9362

rrammfcitktturjsp:
John,

  Is this TRUE?  Wow, I am shaking my head right now.  If it is true, did the guy get the money he was going after.  Talk about putting priorites out of order.

  Sincerely,



  Anne C. McGuire

John9362:
Hello Anne and beautiful baby    :)

I believe it's true......but I don't know the outcome....I have another one for you.

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle, tripping over a toddler who was running amuck inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering that the misbehaving little fellow was Ms. Robertson's son.

                                                                ....AND

A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pa., $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson threw it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

                                                               ..... JUST 1 more

Kara Walton of Clamont, DE. successfully sued the owner of a night club when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms.Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

enjoy  ;D ;D ;D :D

Cheers.... John9362

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