Help finding some kind of Peace married to an athiest

[Michele]

I would really appreciate any good advice/support, especially from persons in my shoes.  I've been for a couple decades to a man who is a complete athiest, it is his religion truly.  If there is a book, show, about athiesm or nonbelief in God then it is or will be in our home.  I used to feel anger, fear and complete anguish and maybe threatened when confronted with these items.  I still do not like them at all and never will because I now awknowledge why, because they make me fear questions that arise that I am unable to answer for him, my child or myself maybe. And it makes me face the fact that we will never be the "couple" of my dreams.  I will never have the relationship with him where we love or even search for God together, it will always be a "hidden" subject or a "controversial" one in our marriage and that saddens me.  It's a touchy subject that we just avoid all together mostly and it makes me feel anxious all the time. 

But I must thank (Slim) I believe it was.  I owe him a huge Thank You because of something I read that he wrote of his spouse with whom I believe he is also iin a unequally yoked marriage, he said something to the effect of "I realize it is I, not she, who has to conform to My Beliefs".  Wow!  That really is helpful to me. I am searching for God because God's done something to me to make me keep searching...ME not him, not yet.   All this time I've worried and worried and made myself ill (and still do some) about my spouses Fate.  Even after I took initial comfort in learning that "hell" as regular "christians" being a falsehood and the fact that there will not be an "eternal torture in flames" for anyone, I still did not/do not wish him, or anyone else I love to suffer any severe punishments.  I especially don't want my child to suffer if she  is caused to stumble because of what she'll learn from him.....then I have to ask myself woudl God allow that to happen?  Well he allows all sorts of horrific things to happen on this planet come to that so that frightens me.  But then I have to say to myself that if I believe he has everything under control and everything good and bad was always/is always all going exactly "According To Plan" then me worrying is a waste of my life and all I can do is keep on learning the best I can and pass on what I know, Right?  I still have that protective mother instinct though that wishes to hide her away from anything harmful, even unintentionally harmful.  And then I shake my head at myself because if what I"m learning here is closer to the Truth, and I tend to believe it is, then God is never going to allow anyone to not be saved...so what am I worrying about anyway? It's like a combination of my false "christian" upbringing doing battle with his "athiesm" and I'm caught in the middle! I feel very alone a lot.

I know I love my spouse and I believe he loves me, and I know he loves our child and only wants the best for all of us which is why he tries gathers all this "worldly evidence" so we will know the "truth" as he ( and a lot of others obviously see it) ...anti-God, god is a myth, bogus, made-up, falsehood, all that matters is science and the wisdom of man...that type of thing.   And I used to get so angry and so afraid and probably judgemental.  Judgemental is what I'd have to have been because if I wasn't being judgemental I would have just thought "i don't agree" instead of "you're so wrong and that makes you bad"...cause that's what I was taught that athiests are by the "christian" upbringing that I had, bad bad people who are going to burn for all eternity! Well, I never understood that and now I know why. 
Just as Ray said in one of his replies "Those who change thier minds against their will are of the same opionions still".  How true.
If it were't for God dragging me to him, I'd not be searching for him now as I understand it, so I have no Right to Judge Anyone!
Now if I can just learn how to Not worry!

I used to feel sad that maybe I'd made the wrong choice in marrying a non-believer because of the scripture "be not unequally yoked"....so maybe I sinned there, but I didn't mean to do anything bad, I just wanted to love and be loved.

But the scriputures also say to "stay married to your non-believer spouse if they want to stay married to you and that your union with the non-believer somehow blesses your marriage and the children of your marriage" ...by the way forgive me for totally messing up the real wording of that scripture...that's the general drift anyway.

So I would truly appreciate any help with this:
HOW do I live in this household, surrounded by this Anti-God "books and stuff  and not feel tainted by it and not worry that others coming into my home will think that I approve of it or want anyting to do with it?  I mean I don't want anyone to think any of it belongs to me or that I go for any of it.   And then I ask myself, Why on earth do I care?  People that know me know better.  I am very meek and I suck at speaches and anything controversial so I don't "preach" in any way...I wear a cross around my neck to remind me of good things, and I just try to be a descent person who never stops trying to find God and I try to keep an open mind and try to be non-judgemental....
sometimes I don't know up from down, somedays I don't know what's what.  I just keep trying to find God.  I don't know what else to do.

WHY does the bible say to not be unequally yoked...but also says that if you are married to a non-believer that you should stay in the marriage if they wish to stay married to you and that this is a blessing to your marriage and the offspring of the marriage because one of you is a believer? I don't understand that at all.  I can see why being with a believer would possibly help a non-believer to "see" that the idea of God isn't so bad..but it could also cause the believer to stumble?  It is hard, Very Hard to keep your path towards God when the whole world it seems is trying to push you the other way.  And also, if you as the believer are a blessing to a union with a non-believer, then Why wouldn't you beling friends with a non-believer also be a blessing to them???  Can anyone clarify this?

I would truly appreciate some fellowship with any of you who are married to athiests.  It's very hard.  To those of us who used to believe or be told by other "christians" that we made a bad choice for our lives and we shouldn't be where we are at I'd have to say that cannot be true can it because everything is going according to God's Plan?  But what about people who are married to rapists, murders,wife-beaters, child-molestors..and horrific people like that?  It's also God's will that they are married to harmful persons like that? 

Help!

[rrammfcitktturjsp]

Michelle,

  Let me share some of my experiences.  As I have stated on this forum I used to be an atheist as well as some other things.  One of my most defining expereinces happened when I was 18 years old.  All, that I can ask you or advise you to do is to show him love and accept who he is.  If the Anti-God books upset you , get some that you like, don't flaunt them of course, but it is both your house and you should take advantage of it.

  Okay what it boils down to, is not advice, what do You want?  Do you really want to stay in this marriage or get out?  I will not judge you for any thing that you do in your life, that is up to God.  But, if you think it is harmful and there is a child, you can see where I am going with this.  It now comes down to what you think is the best for you and your child and your family.

  Decide what you want to do, and go do it.  God knows the heart and does not look on the outward appearances.  I really cannot give advice, as I am not sure if there is ever a breaking point where the Scripture where you quoted to stay in a relationship with a nonbeliever can ever be put to the side after so much damage and harm as your post says.

  I will definitely poke my head in here when this topic gets posted to.

  I will be praying for you and your family.

  Sincerely,



  Anne C. McGuire

 

[Redbird]

Psalm 46

5  God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early.

9  He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire.

10  Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

11  The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge.

Prayers are with you, Michele

Lisa

[Kat]

Hi Michele,

You are worried about so many things 

Phi 4:6  Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.

I too am married to a nonreligious man for many years now... it has not been easy. But with the spirit of Christ, now I am at peace, with the way things are. I still have to deal with things that I don't like, living with someone not seeking God's will at all, is not easy.  I know it is hard to watch those you love make mistakes, because they do not understand this truth. But you have to except that they are right where God wants them too. I understand that God has caused everything that has happened and all that has happened was to prepare me/us for where He wants us to be, and I am certainly okay with that now.

But we are a witness for truth everyday in the way we live. I would think you are a great blessing to your family, because you do know the truth. Even though they do not understand, you are making a very big difference for them, in your example and how you deal with them in love, inspite of there misguided ways.

God loves them too, and He will bring them to an understanding of the truth, when the timing is perfect for them, even if that is later. Try to not worry about getting your family to understand this truth or cause upset among them by trying to change who they are.  Just do the best you can, as God leads you.

If God is opening your eyes to the truth, you should consider yourself to be one of the most fortunate people on the face of the earth, because there are so very few who see this truth.

Pro 3:3  Mercy and truth will not forsake you, tie them on your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart,
v. 4  and you shall find favor and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
v. 5  Trust in Jehovah with all your heart, and lean not to your own understanding.
v. 6  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.

I will pray for you and your family 

mercy, peace, and love
Kat

[chuckt]

love him the best you can, be an example and to not be pushy... knowing this:

1Cr 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

thats all i got, and i wish you the best and hang in there!!

grace to you
chuckt

[Nancy]

Hi there Michele,

Funny enough, I had a bit of a rant at God, the other night, well at the air but i wanted God to hear me because ever since i have met my husband who is Jewish, i have felt guilty because of that passage by St. Paul about being unequally yoked. Why oh why did he have to write that!!!  The guilt at times has been unbearable.  But like you, i loved my then boyfriend and wanted his love which he gave me.  Before i met my husband, i was seeing a christian fellow but something was missing and i'd hadn't met anyone else i liked at church.  But the guilt was horrendous when i started to see my now husband.  So i know how you feel there. 

Anyway back to my rant.  I was saying to God, how sick i am of feeling guilty and worrying and that if it is sinful to love someone, so be it.

I too felt that i had done a terrible thing and that i had fallen out of Gods' will and that any misery i had in my life was all my fautl.  But how could i, you or anyone, be out of Gods' will, because if something isn't Gods' will, then surely it can't happen.  My mother oftens asks God why she had to marry an aggressive, alcoholic, womanizer who beat her but at other times she says that she wouldn't have had me, if she hadn't married him!!

I can't really offer any advice as i'm not that wise but i just wanted you to know that you have similar worries to others.
God bless
Nancy

[DWIGHT]

Hi Michele and Nancy,

I noticed that there aren't any couples on this forum, including me.  Maybe I'm wrong, but that could mean that we are all in the same boat (ark).   It would be wonderful if all of our spouses were likeminded as we, but apparently that is not the case.  I have talked to my wife many times about BT and the wonderful fellowship that I have on the forum, but she still thinks that I gone off the deep end.  I don't preach to her and I try to be as gentle about it as I possibly can, but I can see that it is a distant and touchy subject with her so I just don't bring it up.  It used to really bother me, but God has shown me through His grace that everything is in His hand and under His control and there is just nothing that I can do about it.....for without Me, ye can do nothing. 

Sisters, don't feel condemned about your situation, for all is of God....He knew this would happen, we can't surprise Him; but now that we're in this mess, we must trust Him and pray that God will work in us as He pleases.

It's not easy to thank God for everything, but if everything was just perfect we would already be in the next age.   You both have been led here by the mighty hand of God; believe me, this is right where God wants you....this is where you will find the truth and the truth will set you both free.  Only God can get us out of the messes that we created for ourselves, and here you will find that God will use all this evil for good and to His glory.

God bless you both,

Dwight

[Michele]

Thank you, those of you who are trying to be helpful and supportive...I truly appreciate it.
I fight the guilt and then I say....If we all believe that everything is God's Will, and that He is truly in Control and not us, then We are all where he wants us. In one way it's easy to understand that..say if your situation isn't tooo bad, but what if you were married to a horrific person?  A murderer or a rapist or child molestor, something like that?  It's really difficult for me to understand about how the Bible says you know that Everything going on is God's will even if we don't understand and also that there will be punishements for these same actions...I've been wrestling with this one ever since I read it here....

Surely there are more on BT that are married to non-believers than just the few that replied here?  The way the world is, there must be.
Again I appreciate the friendly supportive replies very much.  Whever I'm feeling overwhelmed I read and re-read these Bible scriptures about
1Cr 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.


However, I received this message in my private inbox (PLease see Below) which I didn't care for at all and was very Unhelpful and I don't know if it is relevant to this situation or not, it gave me a chill and reminded me vividly of sitting in one of the "Hell-Fire, bible thumping churches"of my youth, and this person says and  I quote
"I now am a firm believer that a person may be able to lose their salvation if they are living in sin according to God's word THE BIBLE"

Can a regular poster of BT please identify the person who is a newbie named BEV who  left this bunch of scriptures for me,  and what it has to do with my situaiton?
This sounds quite like a "hell-fire traditional christian" to me..so I"m confused here?

Yes the Bible says "be not unequally yoked", but we're also stating here on BT that God is in control of All?
     the Bible also states that 1Cr 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

So did those of us who married a non-believer commit a sinful act?  Or was it sinful and God's will?  Or what? 
And if he did not want us to stay married to these persons then surely the Bible would not have stated that if the un-believing spouse wishes to stay married to you that you should stay married to them (meaning that you should not leave the marriage just because they are unbelievers and you are a believer) and in fact says that you as a believer "bless" the marriage.    The Bible does Not say "now you've done it, you and your children are all doomed, Get Out Now!"
So What's the Deal?

I've heard many a non-christian state how the Bible is always contradicting itself. It does  look that way, but I'm hoping that I"m just not learned enough in it to understand yet and if I never am I'll pray that God will forgive me cause I surely feel unequal to the task.

Sometimes I am so torn up inside it's hard to go on...I don't have the answers to the tough questions either, all I know is that I am constantly searching for God, trying to connect. When I was a tiny little girl being taught about Jesus/God...all I though of was happy things.  Then I went to church and heard all about the danger of sending yourself to "Hell!"  And grew up and married an athiest who loved me and was good to me, and was always worried sick and although I was sincerely terrified of hell, I never could really accept it.  I thought something must be wrong there because God IS Love, and God wouldn't torture people for all eternity, that's what I always told myself.  And Now, here I am on BT, learning and learning and what I am reading makes the most sense of anything I"ve ever read in my life.  It makes all the more sense because BT wants Nothing from me!  No money, no nothing. (Although I"d be glad to donate now),

[Michele]

I also found this Bible Scripture below....so I don't know what this person is going on about in that message to me above?  Can anyone clarify?

What it feels like to me is that while I am not clear on wheather I committed a major sin or not by marrying a non-believer, that God says that all I have to do is
*Continue being a good person, patient, kind and loving and NON-Judgemental to you spouse and perhaps by your example you will prove that "God's" way is good.
*That your children will be ok.

Since Salvation is GUARANTEED, then I shouldn't worry myself sick I should just learn to live with everything, somehow, and try to continue to learn about God, Yes?



Truth from the Bible about Unsaved Loved Ones

(Acts 16:31 KJV)
(31) And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.

(Acts 11:14 KJV)
(14) Who shall tell thee words, whereby thou and all thy house shall be saved.

(Matthew 18:14 KJV)
(14) Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

(Isaiah 44:3 KJV)
(3) For I will pour water upon him that is thirsty, and floods upon the dry ground: I will pour my spirit upon thy seed, and my blessing upon thine offspring:

(2 Peter 3:9 KJV)
(9) The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.

(1 Peter 3:1-2 KJV)
(1) Likewise, ye wives, {be} in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; (2) While they behold your chaste conversation {coupled} with fear.

(1 Corinthians 7:13-16 KJV)
(13) And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. (14) For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. (15) But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such {cases}: but God hath called us to peace. (16) For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save {thy} husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save {thy} wife?

(1 Thessalonians 5:21-22 KJV)
(21) Prove all things; hold fast that which is good. (22) Abstain from all appearance of evil.

(Psalms 98:2 KJV)
(2) The Lord hath made known his salvation: his righteousness hath he openly shewed in the sight of the heathen.

(Isaiah 50:10 KJV)
(10) Who {is} among you that feareth the Lord, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh {in} darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the Lord, and stay upon his God.

(Psalms 55:22 KJV)
(22) Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.

(Isaiah 56:1 KJV)
(1) Thus saith the Lord, Keep ye judgment, and do justice: for my salvation {is} near to come, and my righteousness to be revealed.

(John 16:7-8 KJV)
(7) Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you. ( And when he is come, he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:

(Proverbs 22:6 KJV)
(6) Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

(1 Thessalonians 5:24 KJV)
(24) Faithful {is} he that calleth you, who also will do {it}.

[Kat]

Hi Michele,

As you put it,

What it feels like to me is that while I am not clear on wheather I committed a major sin or not by marrying a non-believer, that God says that all I have to do is
*Continue being a good person, patient, kind and loving and NON-Judgemental to you spouse and perhaps by your example you will prove that "God's" way is good.
*That your children will be ok.

Since Salvation is GUARANTEED, then I shouldn't worry myself sick I should just learn to live with everything, somehow, and try to continue to learn about God, Yes?

I do believe you are right.
You should listen to the audio on marriage and the one on love,
that is in the 'Introductions and Announcments' section. 
I believe it would help your understanding a great deal.

For those that God has chosen, I do not believe He is giving us a easy and carefree life.
We are to be growing and learning from our experiences, which is the proving or testing of our faith.

1Peter 1:6  in which you exult; yet a little while, if need be, grieving in manifold trials,
v. 7  so that the proving of your faith, much more precious than perishing gold, but having been proved through fire, may be found to praise and honor and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ;

I believe that whether it is by the trials we face being married to an athiest or facing terrible health problems or whatever they may be, it is God's way of building the faith and knowledge we need to be prepared an ready, at His appearing.

It is God who determines what we need to shape us, into whatever He wants us to be.  We have to trust Him, that He know better than we , what He is doing.

Phi 4:11  Not that I speak as to need, for I have learned to be content in whatever state I am.
v. 12  And I know to be humbled, and I know to abound; in everything, and in all things, I am taught both to be filled and to hunger, both to abound, and to lack.
v. 13  I have strength for all things in Christ the One strengthening me.

Be encouraged Michele, God is working things in your life, He knows exactly what He is developing in you and preparing you for.

2Co 4:16  So we do not lose heart. Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day.
v. 17  For this slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison,
v. 18  as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

mercy, peace, and love
Kat

[rrammfcitktturjsp]

Michelle,

  I am continuing to pray for you.  Please, please do not be eaten up with guilt, as that is where Satan wishes you to be. Only be yourself and pursue the Truth.  I am glad that you are making the every effort to stay in the marriage.

  As to your PM, I know in another post, the Mods posted something that if you get a PM that bothers you, you can PM the MODS about it and let them know.  I hastily looked into my outbox and saw that it was not me.   

  Please keep us updated as we are on this end praying for you.

  Sincerely,




  Anne C. McGuire

[DWIGHT]

Michele,

You're right, that kind of talk does not build up but rather causes strife.  All the verses you quoted are the ones to believe in and follow.  Remember that we are all at the mercy of God when it comes to His salvation.  Right now we are being saved, not that we have already attained or were perfect.  We all, including are non-believing spouses will be saved, but only a few chosen will actually be in the feast of the kingdom.  

There were ten virgins; five with oil and five without oil.  When the Bridegroom came, the five without asked the five with to give them of their oil.  But the five with oil (the Spirit) said buy or earn your own; and while they went to buy the Bridegroom came and took the five with oil and shut the door.  When the five without oil said Lord, Lord, have we not taught in thy Name and been baptized in thy Name and gone to church and Sunday school and cooked at the church and handed out tracks...etc., then said the Lord, depart from me, I never knew you.

We are no better than our spouses; in that salvation is of the Lord.  We are to love all manking and our neighbor with agape love.  That is unconditional one way love, expecting nothing in return but our brothers and sisters we love with phileo love which is two way love; they love us and we love them.  And we are to love our spouse in this same way...why?...because in God's eyes we are one flesh, we share our bodies our children our house our food our money....everything!

You cannot unspill the milk; what is done is done.  We are all at the mercy of God so like Kat said, be content with what you have, learn how to be abased and how to abound but in everything give thanks to God.  Michele, you will sanctify your husband because God says you will, and we believe what God says.

We will all pray for you that God will give you strength In Him. 

Your brother in Christ,

Dwight

[Nancy]

Hi there Michele,

I was thinking last night after i had written my reply to you. 

Where does St. Paul say that it is a sin to marry an unbeliever?  He may be giving us advice, i.e. don't go there otherwise you may have a hard time of it, but where does he specifically say, 'IT IS A SIN'?  Maybe i'm being pedantic but it's just a thought.

Also the bible doesn't contradict itself, because you have to take into account the relative versus absolute viewpoint.  This has helped my a lot to make sense of the bible. 

For example, where Jesus says 'Come to me all you who are burdened' 
St. Paul says that no-one can come to Christ unless God draws him first. 
Also there are cases where people are called righteous, but St. Paul says, 'No one is righteous, not one'. 
The pharisees were called children of the devil, but St. Paul says that 'In Him (God) we (all of us including vessels of dishonour) live and move and have our being'.
St. Paul tells us not to do certain things, but he knows that if we are meant to be a vessel of dishonor, then we will do them. 

I don't imagine that i have any answers, as my husband says my epitaph will be 'I don't know anything anymore'. But i'm trying.
God bless
Nancy

[Michele]

Thank you all very much.  It's a blessing to be able to come here and be able to share the burden.

I have so many questions, so many doubts, and also hopes and prayers and then more questions.
One of my biggest worries is to be untruthful to myself and others as to where I really stand on things, the problem is sometimes I get so flustered and worn down even I don't know what's what!  All I know is that I Want to be on God's side.  Period. I am full up with sin I'm sure.  I question things all the time.  I ask God all the time IF he can hear me....and then I go on praying to him, all the time every day, even when I"m doing or thinking something bad, because I know that you can't hide your heart from God, he knows everyone inside and out.  So even when I"m full of doubts ...I go straight on to ask God to forgive me for it!

So you see, I am definately not equipped to "preach" anything at anyone even if I wanted to, which I don't. 

I think God must be doing something with me though because everywhere I look on a daily basis there are things all around me that make fun of God and because I am THE  person in my household who is searching for God,  doing my best to be a good example and search for God, that somehow I feel as if it's Me against all the athiests and anti-god everything in the world! I feel far too small and meek to bear that burden.

I'll tell you one thing.  As awful as I have felt for a long while about this major unhappiness in my life it has caused me to search harder for God than ever before...so Perhaps that's it?  I have no way of knowing for positive I don't guess.  Being married to a non -believer does make you question everything.  On the good side though, the fact that I am still seeking makes me know how much I want God.  I've prayed time and again to God to please never leave me as sometimes I feel as if I'm drifting or crashing through life and things I cannot control and it frightens me terribly. Maybe That iis it!  Maybe God wants me to just let him take over?  I've never been able to do that in my life before because I didn't know wheather or not I believed it, I didn't believe really that God controls us all (like puppets I mean).  I still dont think that, but maybe God wants me to know I can only choose for myself and not for others and to stop trying to "Save" everyone cause it'll take God to do that and all my job is to do the best I can and keep seeking Him???  Or am I just making this up as I go?


Like I said before, i was raised in a way to believe that to not believe in God was the most henious sin ever and they were going to pay for all eternity!
BUT after reading BT and relearning what the scriptures truly say and reasoning it out, I realize that non-believers haven't been dragged to God yet, so they have done nothing wrong!   So how can it be that they are so put down and threatened by "traditional christians" who try to "help" them become "believers" by telling them that if they don't "choose" to "believe" in God/Jesus, that they will burn forever in hellfire!???  WEird.

ALSO, Can anyone explain to my WHY if it's so easy to find that HELL actually translates into GRAVE, WHY OH WHY is nearly all of "Christendom" preaching it to mean "torture in flames for all eternity"? WHY?!!!   I still need the books that'll help me SEE that for myself if anyone can direct me to them.

Is SLIM still on the forum?  I believe he is also married to a non-belive,I'd like to hear from him as wellr. 
And to all of the rest of you in my shoes, Nancy, Kat and anyone else, If it's alright, would you mind if I sent you a private message sometimes ?  I could really use the fellowship.

Also do any of you in my position have children?  If so, what have you/do you tell them? Are you worried about them or do you just let God have it?

I got a million questions.

Thank You all!

[rrammfcitktturjsp]

Michelle,

  Quesitons are okay.

  Have you read the LOF series or any of the papers of Ray?

  You may PM me if you want.

  A lot of impression that I got reading your conclusioin of your post, is you trying frantically trying to control thins and do things.  I am not getting a sense of rest.  I know that it is hard to rest right now, but please fall into the Amrs of Jesus and let him carry you through.  More prayer will always be a good thing.  Read the poem Footprints becuase I think it does apply to your circumstances right now.

  May God continue to bless You and Yours, and may he lead You down pathes of righteousness for His name's sake.  May His will be done.

  Sincerely,



  Anne C. McGuire

[Kat]

Hi Michele,

Until you come to truly believe the scripture that God is total in control and your life is not a run away train,
you will not have peace.

Eph 1:11  in whom also we have been chosen to an inheritance, being predestinated according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His own will,

You need to read Ray's articles when ever you can, it will give you an understanding of God plan and where you are in it.
Coming to understand the knowledge of the truth does requires some effort on your part. 
Studying the scripture is necessary and meditating/thinking about those things so they sink in. Praying about everything is essential, you can never pray to much.

Pro 2:3  yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding,
v. 4  if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,
v. 5  then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God.

Luke 18:1  And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart.

Just as God is working out His plan for your life, He is doing the same for your husband and child. You should pray for them certainly, but do use tact in dealing with them. You have a great amount of influence with them, even if you never talk specifically about the truth... you know the saying your actions speak louder than words.
You just have to do the best you can and as Christ brings you into more understanding you will gain confidence, as you feel Him working through you, because all things are possible with God.

Mark 10:27  Jesus looked at them and said, "With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God."

mercy, peace, and love
Kat

[Nancy]

Hi there Michele,

Of course you can send me a private message.  I would love to have a chat with you.
It's funny but when i get like where you are at the moment, questioning, etc, i find that i try not to, maybe to do something light hearted because i found that the more you delve, the less you know. God will answer when you are least expecting it. 
God bless
Nancy

[rk12201960]

Hi Michele,
You have many deep questions.
I know you will find the answers you are looking for mainy because you are here. I am also learninT from everyone here and find comfort in being here.
try to understand some of us are still in old teacings and still are being refined myself,being one.
I can see the hunger you have to learn so that being said, if you weren't having these feelings would you be looking for God as you are now?
Its might sound strange but God teaches us in many many ways, as it was said earlier there aren't many here as couples.
I'm not trying to make light of your problems because we all care and some of us might be tauhgt by God the way you are.

We have diff lives but I think we reach the same sign post on our journey to know God.
We are all glad you are looking for God and have a deep desire to find him because  you are asking deep
heartfelt questions.
I don't want to confuse you and get off the track.
Maybe ask yourself, would I be here today looking for God if my life were easy? I don't think so.
I will like many others here will pray for you and welcome you as a seaker.
I'm glad you are bringing new understanding to our family.
Friends in God.
Randy

[snorky]

Michelle:

Just think: God put you with your unbelieving husband, so you have nothing to worry about!

Just like God put me with a wonderful person, but one who: 1. believes wholeheartedly in the rapture and can't wait for it 2. believes in human free will 3. believes the unsaved to go "hell" for "eternity" and other nonsense. It does me no good to try to convince him these things are wrong and it does me no good to argue Bible truth...he simply cannot see it! Just like your man...he simply cannot see it (not does it help when the minions of Christendom's heresy spout nonsense such as "if Jesus were alive he'd be a Republican" and other nonsense, or geocentrism or warmongering)! It is to God's pleasure, part of His plan. So I don't think the "unequally yoked" thing is something that should bother you the way it has. Hope this helps.--Deb aka snorky

[Bradigans]

Matthew 19:29 - And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life.