Deep thread! I don't even know if I have anything to add to the great responses. I think we probably miss opportunities every single day.
I think discerning correctly relies a lot on our attitude. See if I can keep ya following me on this. I don't trust myself to say this right but here it goes.
In my 32 years I've had a lot of "upstanding christians" shatter people's emotions. I have so many examples I can't even think of which one to use! These supposed good, prayer warrior type women being totally nasty to others, sometimes within their precious church walls!
On the other hand, I've had people who were rough and tough, down and out, beer drinking, cussing folks who had hearts of gold!
I'll give a good example of the former. A guy named Jon in my church was seeing a girl named Erin. Jon never thought it was all that serious, but she had other plans. Erin's mom was a huge figure in the church. You know how some folks are back row every sunday and that's it, and others are up front speaking, testifying, holy fire burning bla blahblah.....well Jon started dating my sister in law. They hit it off and eventually announced their engagement. Well the woman I spoke of.......how do I say this? She got so nasty, so vile, so over the top jealous and angry that she became a total fool. (I'd already seen her fake tongue talking "look at me be holy" testimonies in front of the church was nothing but religious addiction.) While others were busy talking about how shocking her behavior and jealousy was, I was busy thinking "I knew it. I knew it. She's no good. She's fake." And I'd laugh inside at her.
How wrong was she? BUT HOW WRONG WAS I?!?!? How am I any better to laugh and scoff inside, even when technically I'm right about her being a nutjob and a faker. I'm not better for I'm created equal! And the Lord knows all I've done wrong. They were different wrongs in a different setting, but wrong all the same.
If this woman came to this forum and started pulling her fake "look at me I am here and holy" wool over your eyes, I'd rush out to tell you how fake she is, how she only does it to puff herself up. And while I would be right, I'm not the person to do that.
I feel that I'm nobody to tell any of you anything. I was a crazy, crazy teen/young adult! CRAZY! I should be in prison still. While I've confessed before Jesus Christ and am forgiven, I'm also still guilty. I've done things that would make you think twice about me I'm afraid.
But even though I've done some terribly stupid and evil things, I've had people tell me how much I've helped them. HUH? Me? I don't understand why God would use me at all. But I'm honored that He has. At the same time, he's using that woman who's full of herself and lives to prove her religious dominance over others everyday. He uses us all, wether we're righteous or evil, heavy metal singer or choir singer, murderer or social worker.
I guess what I'm saying after a long winded response is: Our attitude shouldn't make us look AT the person or their actions, but it should make us HEAR what is coming out of their mouth.
Mat 12:34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. Those beer drinking, cussing, hard living people I know, sometimes they have a more pure heart than the respected church goers that I know.
Mat 12:35 A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure [OF THE HEART] bringeth forth evil things. You'd be suprised who you'll find a good heart in sometimes.
Sorry for the ramling post!
Matt