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Hate
indianabob:
Hate, anger, murder.
Friend Alex,
Your situation is not that unusual. As you have read, most of us have lived through similar events.
If I may, with sincere regard for your feelings, let me explore this condition a little.
As children of God, we are to obey the law of love. The problem that comes from knowing that is that we often expect others, our friends, our family to see the need to obey God's law also. They won't. They can't! God is working with you and me and not with the world at this time.
If you think back, wasn't your anger a result of your own selfish desire? Didn't you want those around you to give up their own desires to please you? "But I love her and we had a good relationship two years ago and she was happy with me", or so it seemed.
We all have to realize that true love cannot be demanded. If it isn't a gift, it's not real. There is no fifty fifty relationship. In a marriage, each individual needs to give their best no matter what the other person gives. Each person gives 100%, NO MATTER what the other gives in return. Our task as friends of God and examples to the world is to ALWAYS give our best, expecting NOTHING in return. NOTHING!!!
Lots of married men give their wives all they have to offer and get nothing in return. (I'll let the women explain their side of it themselves.) When I say they get nothing in return I mean no love, no affection, no respect and so forth. Yes, the wife may give grudgingly what she believes is her obligation, but that kind of giving "is as filthy rags", because it is not from the heart and the man knows that it is grudging.
God gives us many examples of obligation in the Old Covenant, but today with God's spirit working in us our giving and our love needs to be genuine and free of obligation.
One of the things you and I can do to avoid anger and hate is to seek the cause for it. It is good to control our passion so that it doesn't bubble over when FEEL that we are slighted by others, but it is much better and more loving to give up having our own way in our relationships with others. The term used for this attitude in the Bible in many instances is MEEKNESS. Not weakness, but humility with the approach of seeing others, all others, as BETTER than ourselves.
There are many examples of strong men, great leaders in the Bible who were meek and teachable, not thinking too highly of themselves. These are examples we can follow as we grow in grace and knowledge and become Christlike in our dealings with all people.
Alex, if my remarks seem a little tough it is not intended to offend, but I noted that many others wrote words of tender concern and I was just adding a little from my own history of selfish anger.
With Christian love, Bob
mari_et_pere:
Bob, that's a great response and sound advice! I've applied humility to my life with astounding results. I used to see everything based on how it affected me. That led to discontent, frustration and anger. When I finally (FINALLY!) applied how Jesus said to live to my life, I found peace in humility. Now instead of seeing things through the way they affect me, I'm more apt to see things through the way I affect them. I'm amazed at how much peace one can find in putting others' feelings first.
Matt
hebrewroots98:
Well said Bob and Matt! Putting others first is...HUMILITY :)
YellowStone:
Arcturus, that scripture is perfect.
Thank you so much for posting it and I do not know of a better way of describing the nature of God and/or his love for us.
Love in Christ,
Darren
Deborah-Leigh:
Its a pleasure Darren.
Bob you say : Lots of married men give their wives all they have to offer and get nothing in return. (I'll let the women explain their side of it themselves.) When I say they get nothing in return I mean no love, no affection, no respect and so forth. Yes, the wife may give grudgingly what she believes is her obligation, but that kind of giving "is as filthy rags", because it is not from the heart and the man knows that it is grudging.
Let me try to explain from a woman's perspective.
The Liberation Movement put women into competition with men. The Equal Rights Movement put men below women in their God given roles as provider and head of the woman. So young men in this wicked generation have to be discerning of placing their commitments with women who are of the profile of Rev 2 : 20 But I have this against you: that you tolerate the woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophetess, claiming to be inspired, and who is teaching and LEADING ASTRAY MY SERVANTS and BEGUILING THEM into practicing sexual vice and eating food sacrificed to idols.
For me the food sacrificed to idols is that deception taught by the National ideals of Nations that advance the cause for Woman worldwide while denying the truths, ways and life of God.
It is indeed a very rare person who is leader as in a man of God, and who has been enlightened to the liberty in submission as in a woman of God. I sympathise with both sexes seeking to find unity and like mindedness in a shallow, deceived and idolatrous society in which we endure the evil deceits of teachings of demons that not only are upheld throughout the Churches but also is backed and supported by Governments who blindly follow after.... "contradictions in what is falsely called knowledge and spiritual illumination." 1 Tim 6:21
As I read what you wrote about meekness a definition came to mind. Meekness is GREAT STRENGTH under CONTROL! :D ;D I think meekness is also knowing God is Sovereign and He is the One in Control! ;D 8)
Peace be to you
Arcturus :)
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