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A Suicide
Robin:
jacieleigh,
Maybe an anti-depressant would be helpful right now.
I know I got Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after finding my husband. It is something that has stayed with me through all these years. If I could do it over I would have gone right to grief counseling to debrief and taken an anti-depressant. They did not know about PTSD back in my day though and I suffered through extreme panic attacks and agoraphobia for years. They called it an adjustment disorder back then. 25% of people do get PTSD after a traumatic event.
I don't know if she has been to Social Security yet or what her situation is, but she is also entitled to survivor's benefits.
She is very fortunate to have you in her life. I had no one and no one wants to talk about a suicide after the funeral. It is something they avoid like the plague. Friends disappear rather quickly.
Many hugs and prayers for all of you.
MG
YellowStone:
JackieLeigh, I agree with MG 100% I too took anti depressants for many years. They were mild and allowed me to live, and sleep. I guess they took the emptiness away which was by far the worst feeling I have ever had.
Let me say, that my depression was due to a chemical imbalance due to massive head injuries. This is all andidepressants do, to fill in the missing bits. Oh, mine were unaddictive and I often forgot to take them. I cannot speak highly enough of them, because no amount of positive thinking, prayer or counseling helpped in the least. The effects were immediate.
Any way, these are just my thoughts,
Darren
DuluthGA:
God bless you MG for what you went through with your husband's suicide and how alone you were at the time. I am sorrowful for you and realize along with you, yet in a different way, that there are some sorrows that never quite fade away..... although one fine day they will.
I offer the three verses that show our Lord knew grief and bore our grieving, and for that I am thankful and praise Him:
Isaiah 53: 3-4, 10 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
[4] Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
[10] Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in his hand.
In Christ's love,
Janice
angie:
Hi JacieLeigh,
I haven't participated in the forum for a while but felt compelled to reply to your post.
I myself was in this situation a couple of years ago now. [at the time I was sure I would never survive it but... here we are]
At the time I had no personal relationship with God or thoughts about Jesus, just a load of mixed up theories based on too many bad movies and opinions of other people with no authority on the subject. I had questions, lots of them, like, what happens to the spirit of people who commit suicide. Was it my fault. Why didn't I notice. Was it my fault.Why was my email program closed when he sent me his goodbye email when it was NEVER closed any other time. Was it my fault.Why did he leave me and his family. Was it my fault. Why wasn't the love people had for him enough. Was it my fault. The number one issue was the guilty feelings brought on by thinking ...If only I....... How arrogant of me, to think I personally could have done anything to prevent something only God is capable of arranging.
"There is no man that has power over the spirit to retain the spirit; neither has he power in [Heb: authority over’] the day of death..." (Ecc. 8:.
Whilst personally at that time, I did not and would not believe that any loving God worth his salt would do such a thing, I truly have come to realise that even when we don't understand the whys, that there is a reason that will in some way be for the good of those involved even though we may never see it in this life. God certainly got MY attention even although it initially was anger. I have to say that it wasn't until I was so broken, and wished with my whole heart that I was dead myself, that I started getting really aquainted with Him. God always means it to the good.
The main thing here though is that you are a good and supportive friend, even if you don't understand the reasons either. Guilt is a terribly destructive force if left to carry on unchecked, even though it too has it's place in the world.
Although it seems at the moment that this is a never-ending nightmare from which there is no escape, I would wish for you and your friend comfort in knowing [if only from the experiences of many others on the forum at this time] that there is life for the bereaved after the death of a loved one, regardless of how they died, but importantly, even after a suicide. Quite a few here can attest to that.
I know it is a cliche, but its a cliche because it happens to be true. Time heals. When more of it is passed and everything happens that is meant to happen within that time, you will both feel better. Whilst its true that nothing will be the same again, it doesn't mean it will be bad, just different. I pray that God comforts you both and gives you hope for the future.
Angie
dawnnnny:
beautiful response Angie, God bless your heart :)
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