May I have some feedback on the commandment that tells us to honor our mother and father. My father professes to be an athiest, my mother goes to church to make an impression on others as to how "holy" she is, but has stated clearly that she "doesn't buy into the whole salvation thing".
Both of them lie about things there is no need to lie about and make up wild stories to paint a picture of themselves they want others to see. They were emotionally and physically abusive while we were growing up, and still are if allowed to have the opportunity.
I spent a month in a Christian rehab for resolving core emotional traumas and have nothing to do with either of them. I do pray for them and revelation knowledge. I accepted my salvation 22 years ago and feel at peace with how things are, my brother who just became a Christian is condemning me and telling me that I am going to hell because I don't respect my mother and father.
Can you shed some light on this subject?
Rachel
Dear Rachel: Well, I guess this is another case were I am supposed to know everything about everything. There are a lot of hard questions in life, and this is one of them. How does ones "honor" a parent who is "dis-honorable?" Good question.
First of all, I have always contended that this commandment is just as applicable to the parents as it is to the children. For children to honor their parents, it behooves the parents to make themselves honorable!
Now then, what do we do when they do not make themselves honorable? Are we to call "dis-honor" "honor?" Is this not a case then of "calling evil good" (Isa. 20:5)? So then we are damned if we do and damned if we don't. Well, there's another commandment given by God's inspiration on the writings of Paul "Honor to whom honor" (Rom. 13:7). In most cases, even "bad" parents have done some "good" for the benefit of their children, and this, they can be honored. But, no, God does not expect us to live in a contradiction. If there is nothing honorable about one's parents, the children can still show forgiveness, love, and understanding that they will be different one day (in Judgment), and even this is showing honor.
Hope this helps your understanding of this difficult question.
God be with you,
Ray
