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Author Topic: why why why  (Read 4991 times)

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sansmile

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why why why
« on: November 21, 2007, 02:42:31 PM »

Was sent these today........just a little humour :)

Why, Why, Why
 Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is
 not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars,
but check when you say the paint is wet?

 Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

 Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

 Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

 Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

 If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

 Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are
 always white?

 Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that
something new to eat will have materialized?

 Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give
 the vacuum one more chance?

 Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

 How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off
 the table you always manage to knock something else over?

 In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

 How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

 And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is
 suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best
friends - - if they're okay, then it's you.


 ;) God Bless
Sandie



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Deborah-Leigh

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #1 on: November 21, 2007, 03:41:56 PM »

 ;D  ;D  Thanks for the laughs Sandie! :D
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iris

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #2 on: November 21, 2007, 10:09:00 PM »

 ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D


Peace and Love
Iris
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musicman

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #3 on: November 22, 2007, 01:46:33 AM »

True.  We say it's alright when someone appologizes for something, as if they didn't really need to appologize.  I always feel like saying, you know, I'm glad you appologized.  Because if you hadn't I'd be calling you a rude SOB.

I don't think that we should use the "why are there still apes if we evolved from them" analogy around anybody who understands the hypothosis of evolution.  Evolutionists don't claim that we evolved from apes, rather they say we (humans and apes) evolved from the same ancester.  Besides, even if we had evolved from apes, that in itself wouldn't mean apes would cease to exist.  Again, I don't believe in evolution but we must demonstrate understanding of things in order to argue against them.   
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Deborah-Leigh

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Re: why why why
« Reply #4 on: November 22, 2007, 01:48:38 AM »



I think the missing link is Jesus Christ. HE is the difference betweein being beast and Man! ;D
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gmik

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #5 on: November 22, 2007, 03:34:23 PM »

Sandie, those are too funny.  Gotta print'em.

By the way,   I am now into year 4 of Upstairs Downstairs.  I am totally hooked!!!!!  Were they a hit in the UK??  Don't know why it has taken me this long to find it.
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Beloved

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #6 on: November 22, 2007, 04:06:05 PM »

This is one I can answer now that I work for the state and have done three days of orientation

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

 ;D  If they used a dirty needle then "that" would have to be listed as the first cause of death. No dirty needle ..no injection ...no death. This change in the death certificate would then need to have an incident report filled out because 'dirty needle sticks' are listed in the policy manual.

This would lead to even more paperwork (they would have to change the dirty needle policy in all of the manuals for the state workers.

There then would need to be a policy on "which" dirty they could use for this procedure  (how old, what type, former use etc) otherwise everyone would want them to use theirs.

This and several other legal issues would have to be worked out and it would all lead to a loss of public resources.   ;D

Beloved
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Deborah-Leigh

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #7 on: November 23, 2007, 02:48:05 PM »



How do you cut red tape?

Length ways :D

That was interesting Beloved! ;D When they need work statistics to rise and unemployment to decrease may be they will do just that...use dirty needles...Public resources are not the priority where I live :'( but that is how God has planned it!

Peace be to you

Arcturus :)
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Rui

  • Guest
Re: why why why
« Reply #8 on: November 24, 2007, 04:14:22 PM »

  Why has someone always has to come out with a joke when the other in suffering?...Thank you again was funny and heartfully(appreciated) touching...
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