Hello All!
My name is Andrew, and as of today, I've been officially approved into the bible truths forum.
Over the past 5 years, this site has blessed my life in ways I could never imagine. My eyes are as open as ever. Making the choice, the right choice, isn't always easy. As a 20 (nearly 21) year old kid, I'm forever grateful that God is willing to reveal truths to me at such a young age. It didn't occur in one night though. In fact, no more then 3 years ago, I was on the brink of suicide. I was an anxious, helpless, go nowhere OCD wreck for all particle purposes. Allow me to share with you how God's grace impacted my courage, and essentially saved my life.
Throughout my teen life, there were countless times I couldn’t complete a homework assignment due to learning disabilities. I hadn’t inherited an obsessive compulsive mind yet (so to speak). Then one day, out of nowhere, I started getting these sudden urges that made me engage in what my family saw as “bizarre” behaviors. These included: hand washing, and reluctance to sit in a chair without the use of a barrier. As unusual and tormenting as it was behaving that way, I passed it off as “normal behavior” simply because I was convinced something terrible would happen to me if I didn’t obey my mind’s commands. After what seemed like an eternity of daily triggers, engulfing the mind, and tearing my family apart, I finally found enough strength to seek treatment.
We had tried almost everything. From hypnosis to meds, nothing had a long lasting effect. Eventually I was evaluated at our university clinic. Being too severe for treatment there, they had recommended I look into going to a place called: “The OCD institute”, a suggestion that would change my life forever. At first I was frightened. I mean, who would want to go somewhere where they nearly deprive you of all the resources needed to relive ritualistic behavior? Then my senses came to me. I quickly realized enough was enough. Something needed to be done. I remember seeing a quote from H.G. Wells that read:
“If we don’t end war, war will end us”
I applied this very principle in the weeks leading up to rehab. I knew that despite the pain, fear, discomfort etc in doing the work, this was something I had to do. I put my faith in God and his infinite wisdom that somehow, someway, I could to this. I could beat my OCD.
On April 18 2006, I stepped into the halls of the clinic, nervous as can be. Initially, I was afraid the other patents may judge and/or ridicule me. There were people there from virtually all over North America suffering from the same issue. I thought to myself: Can I do this?? Will this work??? Why am I here???.
Overtime, in working with hospital staff and socializing amongst the patients, I began to realize how much strength I really had. I wasn’t ridiculed, nor made fun of. In fact, these were some of the nicest, most courageous people I had ever met. It was as if I stepped into a country where our language was one in the same. I was amazed.
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Two months later, I walked out feeling like an innocent convict whose prison sentence had just been exonerated. I was shocked at how cognitive behavior therapy changed my life forever. As of today, I don't take any meds for anxiety , and have near total control of my symptoms.
Since the beginning of time, the Lord is known to work in mysterious ways. Although this was a monumental task to overcome at such a young age, I’ve never been angry at God. I feel this was simply God’s plan of restoring hope, courage, confidence, and above all else, strength in my life. With God: "All Things Are Possible" (Matthew 19:26)
Thank you all for reading!!
God Bless!