Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[WhoAmI]

If I were to die right this moment, I would be about 95% to 98% sure that I won't be in the 1st ressurection, but I cannot pinpoint for sure what the reason I'd fall short is. I know that I still harbor great anger and disgust toward God for taking my father from me, and for not giving me the desires of my heart(A mate, children, etc). I know that my prayer life is slim and none...mostly none as of late, and the thought of praying or communicating with God still makes my stomach ball up with resentment(This is not an exaggeration). I WANT to love and trust God again, but I can't, I literally can't. I wish there was some way to be sure what one needs to do to make the 1st resurrection. "Enduring to the end" is too vague. Enduring what? The belief that God will save all? Not being in the Babylonian church system?

Truly he is a God who hides himself

Not sure how I missed this but WOW...Decky your honesty is awesome. In a world of people who think they know it all and those who try to hide true feelings and such, this is a breath of fresh air. I hope you see what I am saying, I'm not happy for you in your situation but I don't run across many people like this. Most are telling me over and over how they love God and blah blah blah...maybe some do, but I'm very skeptical that all these people everywhere are just so content and happy with God and their life. I hope you get blessed beyond measure.

Jeff

[Marlene]

Jeff, Until God took me from the believe in Hell. I only thought I loved him. I had no idea I didn't even know him. He had took me through many trials in my life .I am 54 years and he patiently led me in a journey all my life that after all these years led me to truth. I had fallen into a sin the same sin that someone else who heard me did. When, I finally repented I could not belive he would forgive me. One, I believed I desearved Hell. One night out of desperation and hating hell I said "Why don't you let me die right now. " Then it went from that to me begging him for his truth. That night I typed in Hell and now that is all part of the journey. I was blind. Yes, you are right we can think we love him. But, gosh darn I was mad at him for something he didn't even create. That is Hell. He freed me from all kinds of sins I struggled with. Like unforgiving, like Hell, like
free will. You are right we can say we love him, but do we even know him.

Yes, I believe he is taking Decky on his journey and many good things will come from all of this.

I will tell you I have never prayed and knew God, or Loved him like I do now. I see him as he truely is. He is in control even if circumstance don't look like it.
We all have a Journey and yes we will be taught to love like him. Not just lip service.
In His Love.
Marlene
Yes, I agree we say we love him, but do we even know him.

[cjwood]

Dave, that's simply one of the best and one of the most directional posts I've read in a very long time.

Simply splendid.

Best.

A.

i must agree 100% with you A. regarding dave in tenn post. kudos dave. your posts are starting to blow me away.

claudia

[cjwood]

Marlene,

Thank you thank you thank you for your message and for your prayers. You know, sometimes when I am in my moments of clarity(Very few and far between)I think about how if my Dad had passed away 5 years ago, a year before I came to the knowledge of the truth about hell, I would probably have suffered a nervous breakdown, or worse. This is what makes me wonder how on earth anyone could have any peace if they really believed that someone whom they loved so dearly was suffering excruciating and eternal pain in a bottomless pit of literal fire with immortal worms eating their flesh. I guess I can be thankful for the fact that God took my Dad when he did, in that his family was at his bedside when he took his last breath. Hey you all, you just don't know how much this is hurting me. I'm welling up with tears now as I type this. I miss him so much, sometimes I cry out for God to just take my life. I know I need to go on, but it's been almost 10 months since Dad passed away, and it still hurts like hell.

dear decky,
almost 10 mths is still so very early when it comes to loosing any loved one to death, ESPECIALLY, if the loved one is your dad. your pain and anquish are still so very raw. it will take time, love from family/friends, and the love of your first Father to heal that open wound in your heart and in your life. my own daddy passed away unexpectedly 4 yrs ago. my momma found him dead on the bathroom floor when she came home from walmart. he was 80 yrs old. my momma was 77 yrs old when daddy died. they had been together since my momma was 14 yrs. and my daddy was 17 yrs. the wound in my family's hearts is just know starting to bear a scar. we would have never been able to heal with the love of family and the love of our Father in heaven. i/we too went through the anger part of the healing process. it is something most humans go through when death touches the lives of their most cherished loved ones. i pray that you will come to understand that God has lead you to this forum to help you heal. He knows how much you hurt. He understands your heart better than you will ever begin to understand on this side of death. i too will pray for your healing, as well as for your other family members. loosing your daddy never gets easy, but it does get better.

love in Christ,
claudia