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Where is My Home ?

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aqrinc:
Marlene you inspired me to write this post,

You are so on about the playing similarities and going against church doctrine. As a teenager (long ago) and
then in my early and late twenties i attended many different churches. Strange to me was being in the
services and always trying to figure; what am i doing here what they are saying makes no sense compared to
what i am reading in the Bible. Well that led to more reading and study of many disciplines including History,
natural and Biblical, several sciences none in great depth but enough to find even more questions. Then on
to mysticism in several forms again none in depth, to astronomy and religions and some unmentionables.

The one thing that has always held my attention is somewhere deep down; knowing that life is so much more
than what i can see here. The feeling that i am out of place in this world is from maybe my 7th or 8th year of
life. At that age i learned something that was then a murmur now a constant buzz, GOD put his word in my
mind and i cannot run away from it. I have tried you know and probably will try again if i forget and close off
the buzz that says (you know what is right, Do It).

You know, now that i reflect i have never known anyone that i can call Father but My GOD. I know that the
talks with my Father In Prayer are the only real Father son talks i ever have. This is the first time ever that
i am admitting this even to myself and it is opening doors i never wanted to touch. Every time i read in the
Bible about being a stranger in a strange land i want to go home, like the trip is great but enough now.

Sorry if i am tripping all over my fingers typing, i can always blame it on Ninny and Marlene; Kindred Spirits. :-*
Ok now you know a part of my story that only Family should know. My Dad died before i knew Him.

Love Peace and Faith,

george.
 ???

Marlene:
George, For sure we are strangers here. I never did fit in much any where. But, as a child I would run to my swing set to get away from stress in the family.
           
Now, I know that they did the best they could. But, that time at the swing set talking to MY Heavenly Father, was the answer to a childs stress in life. Actually, I cannot remember a time after age 5 where he was not in my life. I was well aware there was another place I belonged. Yes, like others I took different paths at times, but he has always turned me around. Every, time I sinned he waited patiently for me to repent. Cause, he knew it was all in his timing. It was a time before Babylon and other horrible sins in my life, that I did believe he was the Saviour of the World. But , I would think why do I just keep doing stupid stuff over and over.  Actually, right before coming in here I fail into a sin that I would have told others they were crazy . Kind of odd it was a sin I was having trouble forgiving someone who hurt me for. Well, the Lord spank me good. Delivered me from that sin. He, also drove me to the brink about Hell. I really felt that sin he delieverd me from was call for Hell. Not thinking he could forgive me made me wish I were dead starting to pay for what I had done. But, that sin is a reminder to me that I never want to hurt him again. Well, one night I was so upset over Hell that I put in Hell and L Ray Smith. Well, I believe before he showed me his truths he wanted me to know I need to obey and not let it go on. Well I read for two days without barely any sleep. I worshiped him and praised him like never before in my life. Cause now I really knew him like when I was a child before falling away. You know , I long for my real home too. I know I have to be patient in his time. All, I know is knowing truths is a big thing. I also, know only he can take me to the finish line. If, not he will be just as loving in the second ressurection . He chooses not me. But, I am wanting to run. I can't wait to run home.

In His Love,
Marlen
P.S. George you never cease to amaze me.

Amrhrasach:

--- Quote from: aqr on November 26, 2008, 04:12:06 AM ---
The one thing that has always held my attention is somewhere deep down; knowing that life is so much more
than what i can see here. The feeling that i am out of place in this world is from maybe my 7th or 8th year of
life. At that age i learned something that was then a murmur now a constant buzz, GOD put his word in my
mind and i cannot run away from it. I have tried you know and probably will try again if i forget and close off
the buzz that says (you know what is right, Do It).

You know, now that i reflect i have never known anyone that i can call Father but My GOD. I know that the
talks with my Father In Prayer are the only real Father son talks i ever have. This is the first time ever that
i am admitting this even to myself and it is opening doors i never wanted to touch. Every time i read in the
Bible about being a stranger in a strange land i want to go home, like the trip is great but enough now.

Love Peace and Faith,

george.
 ???

--- End quote ---

George, you are not alone.   I can so identify with your words.  Through my life he has never let go and I've always sensed that he hasn't.  Always urging.  Always bringing me back.  Always ushering me in a way that I didn't always understand, until usually later. 

And this one:  "You know, now that i reflect i have never known anyone that i can call Father but My GOD."

Dead center bullseye.  Lovingly scary.

Best.

A.

Ninny:
Hey, me too! ;D I was never one to even call my own dad "father" because I've always known that God is my Father :D
George, you know the reason I always trip over my fingers typing is because My fingers are cold!!! Ha! No really I'm not kidding I'm freezing!  :D I know it's supposed to be warm in south Alabama!  You know they say "cold hands means a warm heart!" I wish my heart would come over here and warm up my hands!!

Wait a second! Are you saying that Marlene and I are WORDY!!?? NEVER!! ;D ;D Well I'd write more, but you know, MY HANDS ARE COLD!!! ;D ;D ;D
I'm off to snuggle under a blankey! ;)
Happy Thanksgiving y'all!
Kathy :D

 

Ninny:
One more thought. I looked over as I was freezing here and noticed that the HEAT WAS OFF!!  Ha! :-[ Well you know I feel a lot better now, I'm warming up! ;) Thought I was coming down with a fever! (shut up George!) :P
Kathy :)

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