Death of a sibling

[DizzyD]

                     Before i start, since i don't post very often, but i come to read and learn often, i want to extend a welcome to all the newbies that have came on board, here you will find a spiritual feast of truth, and fellowship.


                     On the 31st of Dec. 2008 my older sister died. This is the first death of a close loved one since i have been shown what little bit has been given to my understanding  the truth about hell, the immortal soul, and the true love of God and the plan He has  for His creation. i do  and will miss her  beyond being able to tell with words, the void is there and words cannot define that emptiness.

                      Some how the thursday of each week seemed to be the day that we always seemed to talk, either over the phone or i went to her home to yak away at whatever came up. One thursday(about 2 or 3 months ago) i went to her home with an agenda to let her know a "little" about my new found beliefs(we were reared in a "hellfire and brimstone" type of a baptist church. i did not go into a lot of detail of this info that had been revealed to me and to my surprise she did not have an attitude of me "going to hell" for not believing the trash that we were taught when we were growing up, instead she listened to what i pointed out to her. She even said onetime about a point i brought up was that now that made since to her, and she said that what little bit i had shown her give her lots to think about.

                       I need to regress here for a moment:  during the memorial service, for the first time during a service for a deceased one,  i felt good about the fact that my sister was no longer in misery and she was sleeping until the Lords' return to fullfill the promise to raise us on the last day. i have adopted the idea that the end of this life is not "goodbye", but it is "see ya later", so i will see her later when God is all in all.
                       Now for the rest of the reason for this post: one of my sisters' daughters has approached me and told me that her mom told her "you need to get with my brother and talk, he makes you think and has good things you need to know". i don't know if my sisters' daughter will be receptive to these truths as my sister was to the few i shared  but since she has shown an intrest in what i think about things i will share (i usually don't offer, but wait for the invitation to speak) so now i am being torn about which way to start off, either with the "immortal soul" rubbish or the rubbish about "eternal torment" or if i should start off with something else. i know that whatever i start with needs to be milk and not meat.
                        It is this whirlwind of thoughts swirling about that i am praying to God over and i ask, for my like minded brothers and sisters to remember me in their prayers that Gods' will to be done in this matter.

                                                Gods' blessings to all

                                                           Bud

[mharrell08]

Hello Bud,

First, praise the Lord for the peace of mind he has given you regarding your sister. You are truly blessed indeed as many struggle with this concept.

If you would like to start simple, try the Foundation Truths bible study from Feb '08. Transcript (http://forums.bible-truths.com/index.php/topic,6452.0.html) & Audio (http://bible-truths.com/audio/Bible%20Study%2002-03-08.mp3).

One of the 1st points that Ray makes in this study is how this is a simplistic approach to overcome all the contradictions the church teaches. As Ray says, stick with these spiritual truths and build from there...let these scriptures be your foundation and you will not fail in gaining understanding for you and your niece. This will help you both as you move on to more 'meat'.


Hope this helps,

Marques

[OBrenda]

Hi Bud,

I would submitt to then start with "No Eternal Hell".
Then the eventual Salvation of ALL!
Then the Sheol/dead immortal soul rubbish....If someone first is presented that we are "dead with no immortality" it may be scary to our carnal mind.

You are an inspiration of the way you are handling your loss.
Warm Hugs,
Brenda

[aqrinc]

Hi Bud,

My condolence on the death of your Sister, she is now at asleep. You will miss her a lot but you
now know the truth about the dead; which we all will be one day until Jesus Christ Returns For
His Elect. In the last 3 years we lost several loved ones to death; thankfully i never thought they
were in hell. I did not know for sure where they were but did understand a Loving God will not be
a sadistic torturer. When i first got to BT website and read (The Letter To John Hagee) my first
reaction was (Aha I knew it) then i read (You Fools You Hypocrites) and just kept reading. Now
even though i will miss their company there is a joy that they cannot be touched by this physical
world any longer and we will meet again. Peace in your Heart Brother and Love for Our Lord Jesus
Christ, Who Has Made This a Reality For Us All.

I have 7 brothers and 2 sisters, my wife had 8 sisters and 3 brothers. We have a lot of Living and
Dying to contend with until Jesus Returns. Come to look at it that is a lot of People for me to visit
during the future Aions and after the Aions.

Concerning your niece, just be her uncle and do not try to convert or change her. If it is God's Will
that He Call's her, He will give you the words to say at the exact time He is Ready. Until then be
the most loving uncle you have ever been.

That's my 2 cents worth, hope it has value for you.

In His Love and Grace.

george.

[Amrhrasach]

                                           i do  and will miss her  beyond being able to tell with words, the void is there and words cannot define that emptiness.

                                                                      Gods' blessings to all

                                                           Bud

And understandably so.

May God comfort you and all in your family.

Gary

[deftarchangel]

First, my sincerest condolences.  I can relate somewhat to the experience of losing a loved one so close to the holidays (I lost my mom to diabetes about a year ago in December '07).  I can only imagine the grief and sadness you and your family must be enduring at this time.  I will keep you in my prayers, that the Lord may provide comfort and solace to you and yours as you try to get through this trying and emotionally exhausting period.

As for advice on how to proceed with your niece, I don't necessarily know if I have any.  I'm sort of in a similar position, in that my niece has really gotten into the Bible (she's 10 years old, and started reading this picture book of Bible stories that I myself used to read when I was a kid).  I never really went out of my way to teach her anything about God and Christ when she was growing up, mainly because I wasn't so sure of things myself (this was before I started learning these truths from people like Ray and others on the net and, as well as enlightened friends of mine).  Now that I know the truth, I'm wanting to guide her, since the stories she's learning may or may not support the nonsense of hell and things of that nature, and I don't want her to get attached to those ideas.  But I'm hesitant to do so ever since my dad got her a "tween" Bible for Christmas, undoubtedly filled with words like "hell" and "forever and ever" that would have her believing that stuff.  And while I recognize that it may be in The Plan for her to learn falsehoods first to really appreciate the truths later on, I'm still wanting to guide her and let her know that God's love and character are not the sadistic and illogical mess that mainstream Christianity would make them out to be.  And while her mom (my sister) is not opposed to her learning about Christ, she herself is not a practicing Christian (though she holds basic Christian beliefs), and tends to believe what the majority believe, especially about the soul going to heaven and things like that.  Like you, I don't want to plough ahead because I don't know how receptive my niece, or my sister, will be to these truths.  So, I find myself having to hold back, and waiting for the Lord to provide an opportune moment.  Anyways, I'm rambling here.

I guess if I had to throw in my two cents worth, I'd let your niece come to you with the questions, and answer them as best you can (how old is your niece, if I may ask?).  Otherwise, as George (aqr) said, just be her uncle, and just be there for her.  If your niece believes that your sister is in heaven right now looking down on the both of you, I could see it being really iffy to try and convince her that she isn't (but that she's merely sleeping until the ages to come), especially at such a vulnerable and emotionally turbulent time like this.   I know my sister, dad, and niece believe that my mom is in heaven with my grandmother right now, looking down on all of us, and they derive some comfort from that.  I'm not all that eager to go and ruin that comfort, regardless if I think the truth is so much more comforting (it's like telling a kid that there is no Santa Claus......you come off as being a complete jerk for shattering their happiness and fantasies, no matter how good your intentions are  ).  So, I just play dumb, until the time comes (and hopefully the Lord will tell me when that is) for me to reveal what I know. 

Anyways, don't know if that's helped any, but I will pray for you regardless.

Take care, and may the Lord comfort you and yours at this time.

Kind regards,

Rob ^i^       

[Craig]

Bud,

Speak to the GOOD NEWS!   of the gospel of Christ.  That's all, you don't need to go into the meatier details at first.  The good news will be enough if God is dealing with her.

Praying for you and the will of God shows through you.

Craig

[Rene]

Hi Bud,

My condolences to you over the death of your sister.  As Marques mentioned, we are blessed to at least know the truth about the state of the dead and the hope of the resurrection, and therefore, we do not grieve as those who do not understand.

As far as sharing scriptural truths with your niece, I have found that sharing the simple truth that "all will be saved" is a good place to start. This statement alone will provoke other questions or challenges from the recipient.  I also refer people to the BT website so they can browse for themselves, but I am confidant that you will know what to say at that time.

René

[jll]

Bud,

Hello from Mississippi,

I lost my oldest brother 2 years ago in a tragic accident. I will never forget the phone call.

My family is full of "the called" but I don't see that any are choosen. Not even myself. I truly feel that God is working me in a direction that allows me to be made more perfect in Spirit each day.

As I am becoming more armed with the knowledge of the truth, I long for the moment God connects me with my sister in law(deceased brothers widow) to increase her knowledge about the truth. This will start with me being on a totally offensive position. It's interesting that Mr. Smith wrote that people usually don't score by being on defense. I will ask her to prove her position scripturally, and keep asking until she does.  A no response will be unacceptable.

This will be difficult because of my family's Christondom attitude. We attend a church with about 4,000 members. This building is typical of tithing, baptism, bricks and mortar, etc. I still attend because of my wife and children, but my heart is not there except for the few times when the truth is preached.

God Bless

[EKnight]

Hi Bud,

I would ask your niece what her beliefs are and then if they are anything that may be upsetting to her regarding the loss of her mother, I would begin telling her the things that would be most soothing at this difficult time for her.

My mother (my father died 3 years ago) is always saying oh poor daddy, poor daddy.  And I said Poor daddy? why are you saying that, dad is not anywhere.  He is resting.  She just can't handle change and was like how do you know....etc....in a derogatory tone.  So I quit.  She is just too old and it's not worth upsetting her.  But if she could only believe it, how relieved she would be.  It's so very sad to see her suffering unnecessarily. 

So, that's what I think you should do for your niece, give her the truths that will comfort her right now and then the meatier things later.

Hope this helped.

Eileen