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[youthfortruth]

 I'm sure many of you have noticed the arctic blast of cold many parts of the country (including my area) have gotten hit with. Today the temps remained in the low to single digits all day. Yet, I'm not the least bit fazed when going out. I don't wear any kind of Coat, Hat, Gloves, nothing of the sort. Simply a fleece with a T shirt underneath. People in school and elsewhere have said things along the lines of:

"Your Crazy!!,  What's up with you??!?! Aren't you cold??"

It doesn't sway my mood in any form. I'm not trying to put on a tough guy image or anything of that sort it's just that having been exposed to those kind on temps all my life. I'm used to it. The endurance aspect kinda reminded me about ways to handle fear. Practically the strategy of  facing fear head on again and again. The principle is similar to that of being exposed in the cold constantly. The more you do it the easier it becomes to tolerate. In rehab we called it "habituation". This is by NO means the most pleasant tactic in combating fear but I've found it most effective, personally.

  That being said, How do you all handle fears? I know that question may seem kind of broad but has anyone else noticed a powerful and/or positive outcome of taking that approach? or do you have a less extreme way of handling light and heavy fears?

Peace as always!!

-Andrew

[Dennis Vogel]

I read this book 30 years ago and it has remained in my head:

http://www.amazon.com/Gulag-Archipelago-1918-1956-Alexander-Solzhenitsyn/dp/0809604795/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1232232935&sr=1-2

It shows how people can adapt to the cold with little clothing.

Dennis

[Linny]

As far as cold is concerned, my husband used to be a meat cutter. The room he spent his days in was 35 degrees or so. He didn't need a coat for YEARS after working in there!

As far as fear, I love this. F(alse) E(vidence) A(ppearing) R(eal)

I agree, facing it head on with the belief that it is in God's hands and believing that no matter what, I will somehow come out victorious because I handed the problem over to my Father in Heaven, is the way I deal with it. When a problem hits, if I don't laugh at it (which I have been known to do) and it gets to me, I go to a quiet place and release the fear.

I mean seriously, we usually win every battle and even the ones we don't win turn out to be in our favor in some way.
We don't just believe in our Saviour, we TRUST in Him.

Our family motto is NO FEAR. We have tried to keep fear out of our children's lives as well by being extremely careful about what they see. It has worked wonders as my kids don't deal with much fear at all.
This past year we were thrown into forclosure and IRS threats just to name a couple of the big ones and came out victorious.
Fear is one of the areas that God has seemed to especially enjoy sending us trials to combat!

 

[aqrinc]

Hi Andrew,

Fear of the unknown was my greatest hurdle, that was until i was about 11 or 12 years old.
I was around then that i learned that the only way to stop being scared was tackle it head on.
Before that i used to get in a lot of fights because getting hurt was scary, and i became the
top attraction for bullies. Once i learned that no matter what kind of pain they dished out, if
i never gave up, and kept fighting until they quit fear went away; i had few fights ever again.

That lesson has been the basis for how my life to date has been lived. When wisdom was added
to that attitude; i used both whenever confronted by any adversity. When i knew that there is
an unseen world with incomprehensible power; i learned most people had no clue what they say
they know. Even though it seems i always knew there is much evil power in the world; with that
knowledge, came the information that The Good Is So Overwhelmingly More Powerful. (I did not
even know how to spell the big words but felt them). After this i started learning about God and
Creation and got really mucked up for many years with church and finding myself.

Still can't figure where i lost myself or how or when; but it was God Doing His Thing All The Time.
Well today He has me answering your question and i did the best i could. So use whatever you
find is worthwhile for you and remember (God Is Right Next To You Always).

I could say a lot more but i think you get the message.

george.

[smeacham]

I try always to remind myself that God is in control and that everything that happens is according to his Will.  This simple mantra gives me tremendous comfort and peace through trials and tribulations.

Steve

[daywalker]

I'm sure many of you have noticed the arctic blast of cold many parts of the country (including my area) have gotten hit with. Today the temps remained in the low to single digits all day. Yet, I'm not the least bit fazed when going out. I don't wear any kind of Coat, Hat, Gloves, nothing of the sort. Simply a fleece with a T shirt underneath. People in school and elsewhere have said things along the lines of:

"Your Crazy!!,  What's up with you??!?! Aren't you cold??"

It doesn't sway my mood in any form. I'm not trying to put on a tough guy image or anything of that sort it's just that having been exposed to those kind on temps all my life. I'm used to it. The endurance aspect kinda reminded me about ways to handle fear. Practically the strategy of  facing fear head on again and again. The principle is similar to that of being exposed in the cold constantly. The more you do it the easier it becomes to tolerate. In rehab we called it "habituation". This is by NO means the most pleasant tactic in combating fear but I've found it most effective, personally.

  That being said, How do you all handle fears? I know that question may seem kind of broad but has anyone else noticed a powerful and/or positive outcome of taking that approach? or do you have a less extreme way of handling light and heavy fears?

Peace as always!!

-Andrew

Hello Andrew,

In my experience, the best defense against 'fear' has been 'playing ignorant'. Convincing myself that I'm not afraid, then I don't have to think about 'fear' and so it doesn't affect me. But when fear does affect me, it is hard to combat. But it also pushes me to strive harder, so it isn't necessarily a bad thing to me anymore, sometimes I 'invite' it.

Funny, I still remember all those nights I went to sleep, in fear that I might wake up in Hell! [And I was a 'Christian' all my life, albeit not a 'good' one] Though I believed in Christ, I still feared that He was going to send me to Hell because though I went to church every Sunday, I excelled in the life of sin Monday through Saturday...

But that's long over! And there ain't nothing that can send me back into that Bottomless Pit! 


Here's to Life After Babylon,

Daywalker.

[OBrenda]

Practically the strategy of  facing fear head on again and again. The principle is similar to that of being exposed in the cold constantly. The more you do it the easier it becomes to tolerate. In rehab we called it "habituation". This is by NO means the most pleasant tactic in combating fear but I've found it most effective, personally.

  That being said, How do you all handle fears? I know that question may seem kind of broad but has anyone else noticed a powerful and/or positive outcome of taking that approach? or do you have a less extreme way of handling light and heavy fears?

Peace as always!!
-Andrew

Hi Andrew,

Sounds like the "habituation" is a process that desensitizes you to fear,
in that you experience you are well and able to endure it.  You are still safe.

I think this is how we find trust and faith in God, beyond our circumstances.

People who are poor financially, have greater faith that God will provide when their option have run out.

So the more time we face a spider/elevator/ladder etc. the more experience we have to quiet these fears!

Funny you mentioned cold...
When I was a child my Dad (ex-navy) would make me keep myself awake on long trips in the car.  I would be greatly annoyed, but he would explain that I needed to have mental strength to overcome things like sleepiness in the cold.  And that one day it could save my life.  (hypothermia)

So I learned and do press through the discomfort of my flesh, (in most areas) to get the job done.  In the military your actions and strength effect all those with you. I now try to apply this to my spiritual walk, and see us all growing up into being all in all in God's time and grace!  It is God who gives us these weakness to bless us with the knowledge that he is in control of all his creation. 
Hope that made sense,
Brenda

[smeacham]

That won't work with my kids.  They'll say "ok" and start snoring in the same breath.

Steve

[acomplishedartis]

 hi Andrew!

I had enjoyed your post.
About fears, first i try to figure out if its a simple supposition or based on reasonable evidence, well at list I try. (i am personally not very fast at this).Once you know you tried your best, it's more easy to endure it.
About heavy, heavy fears we just tend to instinctive react...

it sounds board but it must be part of this 'habituation', right?

moises

[Marlene]

Hello, Psalm 23 really seems to help me with fear.  But, I also believe like Brenda the more trials we have the more experience we get. For me I just wish the more trials I experience I would just get it in my head to trust God  in all the situtations . It sure does make it harder on a person not to just trust and go through the storms with total trust. I know God has sure been patient with me. I just wish it would sink in to my head and heart.

Well, the world is full of fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the known. All, you have to do is turn the tv on. Listen to what people talk about it is usually about fear. Fear of the weather, fear of loss of jobs and homes this and that. Fear of our health. Fear of anything else our mind can imagine. Even, Babylon teaches us fear.

Now, just trusting in who is control is the thing. I am glad God is patient because fear is a hard one for me. We don't have free will for sure, we have choices made from our environment and life experiences. God knows what we will do before we do it.

I just pray every day teach me to trust. I believe we need to look back at what he has brought us through. I thank God and am wanting so badly to have that total peace from fear. I know fear is sin. Makes me sad to know he does not have my total trust in him. He should have after the things he has taken me through. Just pray for me that I get it. It is not an easy thing to admit to fear. But, it sure does humble a person.

In His Love,
Marlene

[britt]

I once read a wise quote somewhere. I can't recall it pinpoint accuracy, but it went something like this. "The thing you fear the most-do" What I take out of this is that unless we confront the very things we fear the most, we will never overcome our fears. It is so comforting to know our maker is with us wherever we go and will be with us as we confront our fears.

In closing,

Do the thing you fear the most and the death of fear is certain - Mark Twain   

[youthfortruth]

I once read a wise quote somewhere. I can't recall it pinpoint accuracy, but it went something like this. "The thing you fear the most-do" What I take out of this is that unless we confront the very things we fear the most, we will never overcome our fears. It is so comforting to know our maker is with us wherever we go and will be with us as we confront our fears.

In closing,

Do the thing you fear the most and the death of fear is certain - Mark Twain   

Well stated Georgia boy and all else. Jeeze, ya gotta love Mark Twain's wit in subjects like this...

 Welcome to the forum BTW!

-Andrew

[judith collier]

Casting down the imagination, renewing the mind, God's Spirit is not one of fear. He might say Caution through your instincts. We can't live by fear or our lives will never give glory to God. Judy

[Ninny]

Brenda, I'm so sorry to hear about your family member. Fear is so devastating! AND it is debilitating. I will be praying for your family. I know it is so hard dealing with family members. My father-in-law needs to be in a nursing home or at least assisted living but he refuses to listen to anyone who wants to help him. He isn't dealing with fear issues, but it's the same thing as far as trying to get him to admit he needs help!
praying for you!
Love,
Kathy

[youthfortruth]

Andrew,

I could really use your advice.
I have a beloved family member whom is sinking I believe deeper & deeper into mental illness.  Which has great fears, and extream allergies that we don't know where the truth is, and the mind is creating.  A complex situation that really is a matter of their life at this point.

The Spouse I think is just in survival mode, and has developed chest pains from the stress of enduring this.  The thing that is most feared and dreaded by this person is Doctors & Medication, any anyone telling them they are not seeing things in a reasonable manner.  The choice to put them into medical care will absolutely freak this person out, and there most likely will be no forgiveness to those who do this to them.

I understand somewhat about "enabling" people whom need help, and I know we have been guilty of this.
I guess if you or anyone has any experience with this on either side and has any info I would greatly appreciate your time in sharing it with me.

YSIC,
Brenda
 

Hi Brenda!

Wow I’m so sorry to hear about the struggles a family of yours is going through. I was literally blown away after reading your post, simply because I’ve been slowly regressing into OCD like behaviors like hand washing, cleaning, etc. Thankfully I know how to handle such behaviors. I’ve fortunate enough have received the mental training.

It’s quite common for someone with mental or any other health problems to be reluctant about seeking help. I can remember being 15, meeting with a psychologist for the first time with much discomfort and little desire to be there. I’m not sure exactly what particular problem your relative has, and if you’d rather not share that’s perfectly fine. With OCD, though, enabling does do more long term harm then good. However, without saying things too overly- controversial about the Mental Health industry, medication should never have to be used as a first resort in treating this particular health issue.

   Without sounding too much like an arrogant Tom Cruise, let me offer an illustration based on personal experience. A psychiatrist will often sit with you, determine a diagnosis, and might throw out the classic “chemical imbalance” clique which then requires some kind of med to correct. On the contrary, and I’ve seen 4 psychiatrists, been in psych ward facilities, and lived in the infamous Mclean hospital for a combined 6 months, talk therapy has shown to best treatment with this issue. For someone to say you have a problem caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain which requires immediate use of medication is WAY too presumptuous in my opinion. True, medication can be helpful, calming, and might correct what’s called a serotonin imbalance, but that doesn’t mean you had something wrong with your neurotransmitter cells to begin with. That’s kind of like being under a lot of stress after work, going to a bar and flooding yourself with booze that calms you, then saying “wow I must have had an alcohol deficiency prior to going into the bar”


 Now obviously you can’t help someone who isn’t willing to help him/herself but Brenda, if it were me I’d find a psychiatrists and/or psychologist that isn’t too hell bent on pill pushing and willing to take more natural, less potentially harmful ways of getting help. Things like Cognitive behavior therapy changed my warped OCD mind and got my life back on track. I wouldn’t doubt for a second such treatment could produce similar results with your family member. 

I’ll personally keep you & your relative in my prayers. If you could do the same for me I'd apperciate it!

-Andrew

 

   

[judith collier]

Marlene, my post was insensitive to you. I must add it took me 30 years to get to this point and medication, therapy, and groups, and learning fear was a lie, since I despised liars I refused to listen to them and overlayed them with the truth of God. It is work but it is so worthwhile but you need others and you need to talk. I still take some medication, but nowhere like I used to. Judy

[Beloved]

This is not my area of expertise but I would encourage along the same lines,

There is a good book and introduction to the subject by Daniel G Amen M.D. Yes that is his name. He discusses many nutritional, excercises and activities that help alter the proble.and he does discuss some other ways to treat and help disorder.

He recommends a SPECT study which looks at the various functioning areas of the brain, it identifies the area and can also help in diagnosing the cause.
The lay Book is Change your Brain Change Your Life.

Andrew I do not know if your therapy revolves around problems with the Cingilate system, like distraction strategies when you are stuck in a thought pattern , eating foods high in Carb pasta bread etc to increase you L trytophan levels that go into making seretonin and also physical exercise. There are also strategy things that the family members can do to break the pattern in the patient  like paradoxical questions or statement  or simply changing the subject with them.

This avoidance to therapy sounds no different than what happens in many other illnesses where people go into a state of denial (flight) rather than face the problem (fight). The Fear beast is so full of Lies

beloved

[Roy Martin]

Hello everyone,
Id like to share from experience,fear,anxiety chemical imbalance and the things mentioned above.
   Without going into a long story Ill just say that there was a time that the only way that I could get through each day was to say," today I think I can kill myself." I was a walking dead man.
I tried psychiatrist and drugs and counseling and people in the church praying for me daily but it got worse.
I had a fear I cant describe and it all started from one incident that I wont go into.It didnt just happen over night either.
  No where could I find a way to beat this.I started reading everything I could find about thought process and I started thinking about natural laws and negative and positive.
Lets call Positive,of God and negative of Satan. We know from the way a car battery works that these two together in the right order has a good purpose but if you connect the wires wrong or they touch each other that theres an explosion. There has to be an order to this positive and negative thing.Light and dark,hot and cold and so on.
When we have a negative thought its like barely touching two electrical wires together,it sparks and burns the end of the wires.Do it long enough and well need I say more?
Negative thoughts will come and will become habit that causes stress and the list goes on.Before you know it you get this so called chemical imbalance.
When Jesus said not to worry( Satan )  which is the opposite of faith,(Positive) He knew what He was talking about.Its unhealthy.
To shorten this. Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts.Everywhere we look negative is there but we dont have to dwell on it, as it is part of life and learning. Dwell on it with one little thought of it and you will cause a spark.If you dwell on it then you will receive it.Positive is always the strong part of this natural law.
Choose a Die Hard, you cant go wrong.Stay positive starting with one thought at a time and before you know it positive becomes the habit. Incident=thought=reaction.  Change thought to positive.Its a simple formula. Positive is God, Negative is of Satan.
This is natural law and forces in motion. Try to go against this and there will be consequences one way or the other. Meds simply slow down the consequences just like jumping out of an airplane with a parachute. You cant escape the fall just because its slower.
Peace and love
Roy Martin

[Deborah-Leigh]

Fear is part of the carnal mind that is only overcome by the Spirit of God.

I sought the Lord, and He answered me: He delivered me from all my fears Psalm 34 : 4

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose Word I praise, in God I trust: I will not be afraid. Psalm 56 : 3-4

It is human to fear. David writes "when I am afraid....I will not be afraid."  Is that a contradiction? No. Something has had to have happened in between to bring David out of his fear. That something is the Spirit of God. 

God appoints to each one of us an experience of a false sense of security and belief that we are in control and have free will. It is only by His Spirit that the Truth is revealed and through His Goodness  we are changed to conform with the Spirit of His Son who has overcome the World, and  heals our Spiritual blindness.

Arc

[walt123]

Hi all


I sought the Lord, and He answered me: He delivered me from all my fears Psalm 34 : 4




walt.