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zander:
I understand.  I really do.  Trust me.  HAd this been a few years ago i would have found the whole thing much more difficult to deal with.  But as i know its all predestined, there is nothing i can do.  Its a "thorn in my side" for sure, but my understanding of God now gives me the strenth to deal with this to an extent which i would never had had before.  Nevertheless, i do love her v.much.  Ive known her for 4 years and we are so close. But i told her that if we split, i wouldnt even be friends with her.  I couldnt.  I would have to move on.  All that effort over the years.  :cry:

gmik:
Yes. Zander, I will pray for you.  I do hope everything works out for the best.  Four years is a long time. Does she believe as you do???  Believe me, that is so wonderful to have a mate to share this with.  It is easy to say Trust the Lord.  But I know how difficult it will be.  My husband and I broke up before we got married.  I was sad, but my mantra was "God has someone better, God has someone better.......".  I can still remember how painful it was. You will be big on my heart during this time.

orion77:
I hear ya, Zander.

I have been with the same woman for 27 years, but she is ready to leave over the faith God has given me.  I keep telling her, that there is no choice between her and God, but she is in the Baptist belief, so she just cannot understand.

The choice is not up to me, it is up to her.  I will not compromise the faith God has given me.  She has been getting alot of pressure from family members around here, since I don't align with their faith.  They are very strong believers in hellfire.

Not sure if your situation is simular, but I understand.  I love her very much, always have and always will, but my love for God is first.  I can not see myself going back to church, listening to sermons of hellfire, just to please her.

My prayer is that your situation is not the same.  Yet, young love can be even stronger.

God bless,

Gary

zander:
Hi guys.  Thanks millions for your prayers and encouragement.  It means a lot to me.  Trust me when i say i pray for all of you too when you post

Claire doesnt deny the existence of God and went to Church for a while before she went travelling 2 years ago.  She doesnt go to Church anymore.  Thats not to say she wont go back.  She has always hinted that she might.  Shes not really a die hard religious job.  So we havent "fallen out" over Church doctrines.  But Gary, i feel for you, in your situation with your wife.  I will pray for you too.

Its basically down to her not knowing if she can see me as a boyfriend or a friend.  Her explanations are confusing.  She tells me she loves me, but i dont know if she is IN love with me.  Probably not.  Its a long story.  She was verbally abused in her last relationship and it affected her a lot.  It made her quite cold.  Not badly cold, but recently its got so bad that i dont know if i can carry on with someone who is like that.  I need physical as well as emotional relationship.  Will keep you all posted for sure.

SandyFla:

--- Quote from: zander ---She was verbally abused in her last relationship and it affected her a lot.  It made her quite cold.  Not badly cold, but recently its got so bad that i dont know if i can carry on with someone who is like that.  I need physical as well as emotional relationship.  Will keep you all posted for sure.
--- End quote ---


Verbal abuse is a hard thing to get over.

The first guy I ever dated did the same thing to me. Nothing I did, said, or wore was good enough, and I was always "stupid." Actually, my IQ is above average, but for some reason I was "stupid" enough to stick with him, though not "stupid" enough to marry him. At the time, I overlooked it because I'd never been out with anyone else, so I just assumed that that's the way all men are. Still, it left me with a deep-seated hatred for men in general.

(How I met that guy is a really weird story. It was borderline supernatural. If anyone is interested, e-mail me.)

Even today if I watch a TV program and some man mistreats his girlfriend/wife, those terrible feelings of absolute hatred come back. Which is why I've pretty much stopped watching Lifetime movies.  :lol:

Claire may never get over what he did to her. Only God can heal those scars. As for mine, it was 25 years ago and I'm still waiting ...

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