Pet Cemetary

[musicman]

There is a post that asks what happens to our pets in the next age.  This subject has several opinions but is void of scripture.  What will happen to our fury friends when the next age comes?  There is no need for pets to be resurrected by god.  The Kingdom age is to take place here on Earth.  Therefore, you can guarantee that your pets do not have to stay dead and can live with you during that age.  I have a new exciting business to resurrect your pets.  It's called,

"Musicman's Pet Cemetery". 

That's right!!  Just bury your pets in my corpse holes and you will soon see your fury little friends again.  OK, their fur may feel a little cold and creepy, and god forbid, if they have no fur to begin with.  It's all about love folks.  There are unseen forces working to keep your pets alive.  They may look at you cross eyed and bite more often, but they'll be yours again (perhaps their souls will be in another world though).  For this to work, everyone must bury their own.  Otherwise, no tellin what your gonna get.  Once I buried someone elses parrot and it came out talking like Gilbert Gottfried.  I had to put it down a second time.  It was just so irritating.  But we all have an opportunity to live with our pets for the remainder of our lives.  Make sure to live and die (excuse me) die and live with "Musicman's Pet Cemetery".







Musicman's Pet Cemetery Inc. does not accept responsibility for pets that attack and kill their owners following possible Satanic Resurrection.  Also, we are not responsible if your in laws return because your spouse missed them and retained our services.   

[Ninny]

Oh, I have to say this once again! You are completely NUTS!! You are too dangerous for words!
Kathy

[Vangie]

Musicman's gone off his rocker for sure! 

[EKnight]

Seriously, how do you come up with this stuff?  What an imagination!!!

Eileen

[Ninny]

Eileen,
What imagination?
The man is POSSESSED!!
Kathy

[Linny]

Possessed by Stephen King maybe. I read the book AND saw the movie.

[Roy Martin]

What an imagination. You should be making money with it. To top it off, its bazaar with humor and does have a bright side to it. Putting the parrot down again, it was irritating. Now thats pure talent.

Peace
Roy

[Ninny]

MusicMan?
Why am I the only one who thinks you're possessed? I have to admit, you are funny! I think it would very funny if you could bury that voice of Gilbert Gottfried, the man is NASTY!!

My grandsons have a video game called "Ty the Tasmanian Tiger" Gottfried's voice is used for some kind of parrot-looking bird that you REALLY want to silence, he follows you around in one area of the game and tries to drive you insane! (I admit I've played that game!  Cute!) He also plays an annoying parrot in the Disney movie "Aladdin" Isn't he also the voice of the duck in the "AAAAFLAK" commercials?
You're still weird, MM, but life would be dull without your weird sense of humor!!
Kathy

[musicman]

Future customers:

I have gotten many complaints the last couple of days about my pet resurrection business.  People complain, waahhh, my pet smells bad now.  Boooohooooo, my cat's leg fell off when it was walking around.  Sob sob, the worms and buzzards feed on my boxer when it goes outside for a dump of the crypt.

Folks!!  These are dead animals.  I'm not god!!  I only say they're alive because they are . . . . . .well. . . . .animated n stuff.  They have no pulse.  Their parts are stiff and totally unflexable (conducive for snapping off).  I'm sorry, but I can't do anything about the smell of death they will have for time immortal.  However, I am willing to let you bring your special furball of joy back to be reburied if it looses parts or has chunks eaten out of it by nature's scavengers (those are animals that through evolution decided, hey, I like the taste of death).  I do require a low risk fee for you to do this however.  This is because your pets probably won't go down voluntarily while they are still alive and possessed by Satan. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .excuse me, alive and full of joy.  This could be a danger to me if they're really p'd and come hounding me in my quaint living space.  And please, I don't want those walking corpses near me.  Sooooooo, let me know when you're gonna do it so I'll be in another zip code.  Just leave the check in my mail box.  We're on the honor system.  This means that if you don't pay up, I'll just rebury that first grade teacher you had and hated so much, in my cemetery.  Once she is resurrected, I'll just give her your address.   



Musicman's Pet Cemetery is a ministrey of love and wants you to experience that love for the remainder of your years.

[Ninny]

What did I say? I rest my case! MusicMan you are headed for serious "death" threats with this one!
Ahahaha!

[deftarchangel]

Kick in a free Ramones Greatest Hits CD, Musicman, and you've got a deal!   

[Ninny]

Oh MY GOSH!! I just thought of something! MusicMan, Your offer is much like one that I heard on TBN once!! Pay your money and we give you something that can't REALLY be worth anything!!  Ha! Oh yes, I know, that is one of those schemes where YOU get rich with your "ministry of love" and everyone else gets bilked out of their money! Ahahaha!! You are very clever!
Funny guy!
Kathy

[musicman]

I offer a walking cadaver.  What more could you want?

[Ninny]

What could be more worthless than a ZOMBIE Chihuahua

http://www.google.com/images?q=tbn:2QFxUdeOd4wJUM::www.bestweekever.tv/bwe/images/2008/09/chihuahua-toupee.jpg

a zombie chihuahua in a toupee!!!

Muahahaha!

[Vangie]

Musicman...aka...."Re-Animator".  Now that was The movie of B movies!!
http://www.fast-rewind.com/reanimator.htm