Thank you all [kat,iris,dave, mark]for the warm welcome....i feel so blessed aready.
I've had a good exposure to teachings from Methodist, SDA, LMS and Pentecostal. At best, it has left me unfufilled and at worst-confused
. That coupled with the 'fiery darts'
of marriage and relocating to another Pacific island where these mainstream churches are 'gods' left me frustrated. I tried so hard to understand their brand of christianity....many times praying that God will give me a new heart towards them but it grew worse. I've had 2-3 alter-calls....blaming myself for having a 'evil' heart and wanting redepmtion but nothing changed.
I reached my cross-roads in life in 2005 (34 yrs old) when i almost lost my only son/child to some mysterious illness. At about teh same time, my husband had left for Australia for 5 months training (no doubt God orchestrated)....i felt so ALONE...totally drained emotionally and physically. After 5 long nights of watching my son deteriorate, i had to rush to my office to apply for more leave. I vividly recall typing smth on the computer when i just fell off my chair and cried out. It was a cry from deep within my soul...looking out my office-window, to the sky, i muttered smth like 'Lord, change me but pls don't take my only boy from me, the same way you took my dad away'. Till that point, i was never a religious person but i believe that was my spritual conversion. WIthin 2 days, my son recovered FULLY and doctors were amazed with the ALL CLEAR test results.
SInce then, i've been on an unquenchable thirst to know God more. At about the same (2005), i enroled to do my Masters degree online from Australia. As of today, i've stalled with my Masters study but i've become a student of my divine-Master....its been an awesome journey....just me and Him. I even call him 'papa'....and we chat throughout the day. I did a solo-journey of the entire bible in Sept.07 to April 2008....in as much as i've heard those verses before, somehow it had a whole new meaning to me. Not only that, but God has miraculously dealt with areas that i know i could NEVER have changed on my own-my pride, self-centredness (career focus), unforgiveness/anger, critical and judgemental of others. He has given me the power to deal with it.....and what better way than to use close family members to wrought out the 'impurities' from you
I still cannot quote scriptures off-hand but there are some passages that sticks to me like glue. I like the one that says smth to this effect, 'by the same measure of mercy & grace that was extended to you, you are commanded to do the same to others'. God reached down and picked me up in 2005 when i least deserved it so i give that to others freely....even when i feel they don't deserve it.
I'm far from being perfect. Believe it or not but i've never been much of a smoker. But since 2006, i've prayed about this annoying bad-habit....its been an on-off journey. When i started reading the LoF series, the smoke/coffee kept me awake till the wee hours.
Being an avid reader, i have read widely....BT is like 'home-coming' for me since Jan.this year. Now the Pentecostal church that i used to attend are all wondering why i havent been back since Dec last year. At times i wonder whether its my tithing they miss
or me
.
Ok, i better stop here....sorry i got carried away. I look forward to having some reflective discussions from Ray's writings.
Blessing Always.
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Topic: I'm new (Read 8030 times)