Home schooling

[prarrydog]

I have a daughter who is starting school this year and a wife who is a stay at home mom and am wondering if anyone has opinions or experience with home schooling (pros, cons, etc.).   Love to hear from you.  Thanks.

[JesusOnly]

Hi there prarrydog.

We have been homeschooling our daughter since she was small.  This is/was her first year of highschool... at home.  She has never stepped foot into the public school system.

Pros - Better education.  Better grades.  Better environement.  You always know where your child is :wink:  You always know where she is at in her level of learning.  You are the educator.  And there are good christian institutions to choose from(choice).  The benefit of self-confidence for the parents educating their own child, etc.  You get to influence and shape the child as oppossed to the public school system.

Cons - One parents time will be tied up with childs school preperation and teaching.  Money - it can get expensive.  Putting up with possible abuse by those who look down on home-schoolers (normally doesn't happen but there are some opinionated ones out there).  

The greatest joy is the parents knowing that they had a direct hand in the childs developement and education.  It takes hard work and demands time.  The pro's easily outweigh the con's when there is this choice available to the parents.

Blessings in you endeavors.

[hart4god]

Hi,
Glad to hear you are considering this with the needed deliberation and caution
We homeschooled 4 children who are now ages 23-16
I have graduated 2 who are attending colleges and have one who will be a senior next  year and one who is attending public school and will  be a sophmore. So we have been at it for 15 years! My atttic is SO full of teaching materials that I should start a Day School!!!

The great advantage of home school is that there develops an incredible bond and relationship between the parents and the children. Kids know very early in life if they are important and worthwhile and the time involved in home education is a quality demonstration of that. (It is not the only way parents demonstrate it- so don't worry-  I am not like a homeschool nazi!)

I was completely convinced that the Lord wanted this lifestyle for our family because I was so carnal and selfish and would have handed my kids over to be raised  by others without a thought. I am grateful that God gave me what I needed to have such open and honest relationships with the kids.

Our life and the lives of the kids are not perfect- the oldest one has been in and out and in and out of trouble but he always returns to what he knows in his heart as he works out his salvation. He can talk to us and we are there for him as he sorts through his mistakes. That to me is more valuable that the "Fine Education" that some home schoolers promote. I am not big on school or institutions in general- they exist for their own purposes and do not serve most kids....they are fixated on producing a product. You need to be aware that home education is not a garauntee of a perfect product but it is a method of relationship. Some will tell you if you do everything right you will have a perfect result. Bad advice. Your kids are individuals with a destiny and a path to walk-

If you want to have the greatest influence on your children - home education is a good path but beward the leaven of other homeschool families- they tend to be of the most legalistic types I have ever encountered and their pressure and influence is profound. Home school groups are great-as long as you are aware of the peer pressure they can generate for parents  

Home schooling is a good choice for the most part but I would say, before you dig in for the long haul to keep an open minds and always consider what will be best for each individual child. Last year we put our youngest daughter in the public school for the same reason we took our oldest child out at the end of 2nd grade-learning problems. So life can be ironic and you have got to let the Lord lead your heart in this every day.

In hindsight I may have been better off putting some of them  back in school at certain points  but God knows all.........

Blessings-
hart4god

[eutychus]

I have a daughter who is starting school this year and a wife who is a stay at home mom and am wondering if anyone has opinions or experience with home schooling (pros, cons, etc.).   Love to hear from you.  Thanks.

My sister home schools her three kids.

all i can say is for them WOW, these kids are the smartest and most
well adjusted kids, much talent too.

the 12 yr old girl has already written a childrens book.


there is much support to within the community of homeschoolers.


i would most definalty check into to it.

peace
chuckt

[prarrydog]

Thanks to you all for your input.  I truly appreciate it.  God be with you.

[Becky]

On the other hand......

public school is a great opportunity for children to be integrated with many differnt children.  This is good because they can learn to decide for themselves who they want to be friends with and how they want to conduct themselves.   They can often be a better light in the darkness rather than a light in the light!  Being tough in a raw , real-life environment can often help children adjust to the working world with less environmental changes.  Children can be independant and feel that you, as a parent, can trust them on their own, often leading to a mutual respect toward the parent.  It was my experience (with the specific individuals that i knew who here homeschooled) that they were not socially on par with the public school kids.. they had a much harder time adjusting to the working world and were constantly having to deal with pop culture with "virgin" eyes... it hindered them and constantly made them withdrawl to their parents/ family.  Some were depressed because when they joined public schools, they were educationally behind, because even though the praents did a great job, they are only 2 people.. it was hard for them to give the girls all the opportunities that a public school could give (including a group setting: band, arts, recess, lunch, .... these interactive classes would have cost an arm and a leg for the parents to join clubs and organizations to get that interaction..  the girls i knew had a hard time socially becuase they were not problem solving and lerning cooperation with peers on a highly saturated level.... 6 hrs a day with constant interaction with diverse peers could not have been accessible in the home.. some of the girls got into grunge and rebelled for being sheltered.. others got depressed and wouldn't leave the house... the sibling who went to public school from the start, did well socially and emotionally and was the only one who went to college.


DONT GET ME WRONG..... the experience I had was from a  few individual home taught kids.  I cannot say the examples here are true for all home taught students... it is just food for thought....

JUST REMEMBER:  You know your children.  You can decide how they might do in these situations.  You cannot shelter them from reality their whole life, and when they experience it later in life they might have a harder time with it.  Public school is safe if you as a parent teach your kids how to respond to it.. to be strong, independant, wise, and to know that they can always come to you for help.   By being an active parent in their school, you can be involved with their education.  My parents were parent volunteers in kindergarten and continued to be involved (but more passively) through high school.  

IT ALL DEPENDS ON WHAT YOU ARE WILLING TO PUT IN TO YOUR CHILD'S EDUCATION..... and of course, what God WILLS!

All the best!

[eutychus]

On the other hand......

public school is a great opportunity for children to be integrated with many differnt children.  This is good because they can learn to decide for themselves who they want to be friends with and how they want to conduct themselves.   They can often be a better light in the darkness rather than a light in the light!  Being tough in a raw , real-life environment can often help children adjust to the working world with less environmental changes.  Children can be independant and feel that you, as a parent, can trust them on their own, often leading to a mutual respect toward the parent.  It was my experience (with the specific individuals that i knew who here homeschooled) that they were not socially on par with the public school kids.. they had a much harder time adjusting to the working world and were constantly having to deal with pop culture with "virgin" eyes... it hindered them and constantly made them withdrawl to their parents/ family.  Some were depressed because when they joined public schools, they were educationally behind, because even though the praents did a great job, they are only 2 people.. it was hard for them to give the girls all the opportunities that a public school could give (including a group setting: band, arts, recess, lunch, .... these interactive classes would have cost an arm and a leg for the parents to join clubs and organizations to get that interaction..  the girls i knew had a hard time socially becuase they were not problem solving and lerning cooperation with peers on a highly saturated level.... 6 hrs a day with constant interaction with diverse peers could not have been accessible in the home.. some of the girls got into grunge and rebelled for being sheltered.. others got depressed and wouldn't leave the house... the sibling who went to public school from the start, did well socially and emotionally and was the only one who went to college.


DONT GET ME WRONG..... the experience I had was from a  few individual home taught kids.  I cannot say the examples here are true for all home taught students... it is just food for thought....

JUST REMEMBER:  You know your children.  You can decide how they might do in these situations.  You cannot shelter them from reality their whole life, and when they experience it later in life they might have a harder time with it.  Public school is safe if you as a parent teach your kids how to respond to it.. to be strong, independant, wise, and to know that they can always come to you for help.   By being an active parent in their school, you can be involved with their education.  My parents were parent volunteers in kindergarten and continued to be involved (but more passively) through high school.  

IT ALL DEPENDS ON WHAT YOU ARE WILLING TO PUT IN TO YOUR CHILD'S EDUCATION..... and of course, what God WILLS!

All the best!

becky,

you do know homeschoolers have all kinds of activities with other children?

its a big network.

lots of people think homescholling isolates the children, but it really doesnt.


http://www.topscience.org/homeschoolers.htm

http://creativehomeschool.tripod.com/

peace
chuckt

[Becky]

nope i didn't know that.... like I said, the girls i knew did not have that interaction

thanks for the links!

[eutychus]

nope i didn't know that.... like I said, the girls i knew did not have that interaction

thanks for the links!

thats cool, its  growing all the time.

be well

[prarrydog]

Becky,

  I understand what you are saying and I agree...somewhat.  I personally do not have a problem with public school.  I do however have a problem with public school at 5 years old.  

  A 5 year old child, in my opinion, does not, no matter how much you prepare them, have the tools to deal with teasing, bullying, peer pressure etc..  Some may learn to deal with it but I think alot don't.  

  What my wife and I are leaning toward is to homeschool for 2 or 3 years and then public school.  Our reasoning is we simply believe we need to build our daughter's confidence and individuality before allowing others to try and tear it down.  

  On the other hand maybe dear old daddy just needs to let go.  LOL.  Yes I admit it , it makes me sick to my stomach to send my little girl into the world.

with love
thanks Becky

[Becky]

aww that reminds me of finding nemo!!

[gmik]

I took 10 years off of teaching to raise my kids.  I had been teaching for 5 years and just decided I would stay home.  When they got to school age I sent the first one to our public school. By the 2nd one a new private "Christian" school had opened up.  So all 3 went to a school that I eventually taught at also.  Here is my point.  BE INVOLVED if you send to a public school.  Don't assume anything.  Be in the classroom.  Know what is going on and KNOW who your child hangs out with.

To homeschool is awesome.  I just think you have to be a very special person (which you all are!), with lots of patience.  I didn't think I could do it-and as my kids went free as long as I taught at the christian school there-so homeschooling was never a serious option. I quit the school when they all graduated and then went to public teaching so I could have a retirement.

I have some wonderful students and parents in my classes.  BUT the low lifers are becoming the majority.  I could tell you stories that would curl your straight hair.  It is so sad.  Your innocent children will learn lots of things that you wouldn't want them to learn-and I am just not talking cussing.

Cherish them and Protect them as long as you can.   If you have the wherewithal to homeschool I think that would be ideal.

So do what the Lord leads you to do.

[JJ]

Very interesting to hear from different perspectives.

We have been a homeschool family for 16 years.  Our son was in public school for 5 years, so I know about sending a 5 yr. old away.   Our 3 daughters, 19, 15, 12 have always been at home.  I'm passionate about this topic, as I have loved being with my children-- what a privilege and
pleasure as well as sacrifice and responsibility.  

Education and character will depend on parental influence whether public or home is chosen.   Socially, homeschoolers have so many opportunities
but there are some things that children can be spared from at home.  

If the parents are legalistic or socially challenged, the children will be
molded in that way whether h.s. or public educated.   Character development should  never take a back seat to education, for what is the value of a man that has degrees and intelligence but no moral character?

Problem we have found is that the majority of homeschoolers in our area
are quite religiously legalistic.  This is a big turn off for my girls, especially as they age.  This is not a homeschool problem, but a religious one.  

Some of the benefits I have seen through our years:  we had control over dating scene- no dating allowed and no temptaion or influence for
8 hrs a day-- we also did NOT go to organized church, where dating is
quite often encouraged or at least allowed.   My girls have enjoyed their girlhood and developed healthy values and strengths.

The very young child was protected until they were strong and confident
enough to be on their own.  The more adventurous child was protected from themselves!  But most awesome thing is that my 3 girls are so close.  I never allowed them to fight or be cruel to one another.  
They aren't perfect, but even as teens, they are so much closer because of the large amount of time spent together.  They all still giggle and talk
and even cuddle together at times.  

Every day, I realize how I have failed them, but try to stay balanced and
know that God is soveriegn and where I have failed, He will use that
weakness to bring them to Himself.   Had they been in public school, there would have been failures as well.   One thing, they KNOW how important they are to their Dad and I,  and  they are quite secure in that
love........  so whatever your choice, live every day #1 to love God with
all your heart and #2 to love your family-- paying attention and nurturing
and protecting-- putting no hobbies, pleasures, self-interests above your
precious children or spouse.   We are insufficient for the job of parenting
and NEED God every step of the way!
JJ

[buddyjc]

We homeschool all five of our children.  The oldest just graduated from High School and is going to college in the fall.  There are a lot of good reasons to homeschool, but you must first make sure you are up to it.  It can be very demanding.  It also depends upon your children.  We have two daughters whom we have been told would never make it in a classroom environment.  They constantly need one-on-one teaching.  Children with learning disabilities do much better at home.  

I have heard all the stories of how homeschooled kids do not get the social skills they will need when on their own, but this is false.  They have to be taught social skills anyway, and who better to teach them than you.  

Homeschooling can be quite expensive as well.  You will have to purchase your own curriculums and books.  They are not cheap, but if you can get into a homeschool group, they do a lot of lending.  

After homeschooling for 18 years, we would never send one of ours to public school. (Although we have threatened them with this.)  Anyway, it is your choice.  I went to public school and I did not turn out so bad.  I know things have changed a lot since then though.  Hope this helps.

Brian

[nightmare sasuke]

I have a daughter who is starting school this year and a wife who is a stay at home mom and am wondering if anyone has opinions or experience with home schooling (pros, cons, etc.).   Love to hear from you.  Thanks.

I've been home-schooled most of my life.

I personally like it better. It's more hands on; if you have a problem with something you're not forced forward with a lack of understanding; and you do not have to deal with all the anti-christian people who can be a big influence on many kids.

On the other hand, would your daughter be able to be taught by your wife? In other words, would she listen to your wife?

On the other hand, school can teach you some important things:

[1] They do not teach you a thing--they give you work and you teach yourself.
[2] 80% of society is horrible.
[3] Some teachers are very awesome.

PS. Maybe you could start her in school, see how it goes, and then decide to take her out or leave her in, or vice versa.

[nightmare sasuke]

I have a daughter who is starting school this year and a wife who is a stay at home mom and am wondering if anyone has opinions or experience with home schooling (pros, cons, etc.).   Love to hear from you.  Thanks.

How old is your daughter? What grade would she be going into?

[prarrydog]

Again I appreciate all of the input.  My daughter is 5 and would be starting kindergarten this year.  The more I research this the more I think we are going to home school.  The pros seem to out weigh the cons.  Apparantly here in Canada there is no cost involved either.  You submit receipts and the government pays back for books, swimming lessons, dance classes, trips to the zoo, museum etc.  Added bonus.  I was also told by the home schooling board that the first 3 years are not as regimented as you might think.  They said that the teaching just sorta blends in with every day life.  We'll see.  We are actually getting pretty pumped about it now.  Thanks again everyone and if anyone has anything else to add feel free.

[buddyjc]

I'm moving to Canada!  

Brian

[joyful1]

Prarrydog-
Of course, like anything else, the Spirit of Truth will guide you....for us the experience of homeschooling was wonderful!  I wouldn't have traded the moment my children learned to read or painted their first sunrise or solved their first Algebra problem....for all the tea in China!  We can honestly say that the four of our seven that stayed in homeschool through grade 12 are better adjusted socially, better educated, more trustworthy and more loving than the ones that just "had to go to public school" in high school.  The reason for it is really no great mystery....there simply was not enough TIME in the day to communicate with the ones in public school.  They were always in "school" where they were "learning" to perfect the art of rebellion.  Our greatest heart aches stemmed from their "learning" while in an atmosphere of rebels. To this day, we are all reaping the wages of those experiments with public school.  The sports, activities, science labs, etc. were nice, but would I have traded them for a closer walk with my other three children? In a heart beat!
joyful1