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[EKnight]

My job has become a stumbling block to my spiritual growth.  I just can't seem to be the light I would like to be and in fact, I am anything but.

I work for a bank but in a small office of five. It is a very relaxed office but sometimes to the point of unprofessional.  I like the relaxed atmosphere but not the lack of supervision that allows for the third paragraph of this post.**

 I butt heads with one person because she is a know-it-all who really knows nothing at all and seems to talk just for the sake of looking knowledgeable.  I am constantly trying to prove her wrong because she is adamant about things she knows nothing about.  I am ashamed of this.

**Then there is another person who is funny but gets crude (and I mean crude) at times.  When this occurs I just get silent or timidly tell her to stop.  She has an obsession with lewd commentary and I will admit there are times I laugh and probably shouldn't.  I am ashamed of this.



I can't seem to be the spiritual person I would like to be while I am at work.  I enter that world and it take over me.  I don't know how to handle this anymore.  I don't even want to work but I need to.

Eileen

[aqrinc]

Hi Eileen,

Just a few hours ago i read a post where you were concerned about not getting many hard trials, maybe we need to work on these easier ones first. Do not ask for trials, but when you get trials you now have the chance to practice what you have learned. It may be a hard thing to do but; this is The Command From Jesus Christ:

Mat 5: 44-48 
But I say to you, Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who despitefully use you and persecute you,
45  so that you may become sons of your Father in Heaven. For He makes His sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.
46  For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax-collectors do the same?
47  And if you greet your brothers only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax-collectors do so?
48  Therefore be perfect, even as your Father in Heaven is perfect.

george.

[myms]

Thank you for your honesty Eileen. Its easy to talk the talk, much much harder to walk the walk!

[Terry]

Hello Eileen
I understand your situation as i think many of us face these same things, i think George gave enough Scriptures so i want add anymore, however i would if i may like to add this.

Six years ago i became very sick my thyroid was very low( 57 ) should be about 1 to 5 and because of that it damaged my matabolism beyond repair i'm so weak all the time i can't walk more than about 100 feet at a time before i need to rest,i can't find a job anywhere that i can do, the stress of all of this seems at times more that i can bare, you know, no health, no work that i can do the things that a husband and father should do,please don't think i don't see your problem or feel for you because i do and i will pray for you( really) but what i'm saying is Oh what i'd give to be able to be in your shoes.

Theres a friend of mine who was 40 when he drove his car off the road 5 yrs ago he's been paralized from the neck down every since, i know he would love to be in my shoes,well anyway i really don't know why i feel led to share all this with you it certainly is not to offend in anyway maybe i just need to share my problems also, i don't know, but one thing i do know is back when i was working and had good health i didn't realize what i had until i got sick, some times i think we're so blessed and we don't even know it,please accept my reply in Christian Love for that is truly what it is.
May God Bless
Terry

[myms]

I suppose we need to keep our eye firmly on the point of the trials, and for me that is to keep me humble and dependant on God. My trial - in terms of maintaining a close walk with God - is living with a non Christian partner, and experiencing some of what Eileen shared. For others its their health, for others a habit they struggle to overcome. For me, I just have to keep my eye on the end purpose, when I don't I too get angry and confused! Dealing with the anger and confusion is also part of the growth process, I guess. It is encouraging though to be reminded that we are not alone, that we are all, in different ways, struggling to become who God wants us to be, and that none of us have made it yet!!

[Amrhrasach]

My job has become a stumbling block to my spiritual growth. 

I can't seem to be the spiritual person I would like to be while I am at work.  I enter that world and it take over me.  I don't know how to handle this anymore. 

Eileen

Eileen,

I hope you take no offense in my reply because I certainly don't mean any.   Let's see if we can look at it from a different point of view.     

Perhaps, just perhaps, your job has NOT become a "stumbling block" to your spiritual growth.  It just seems that way to you now.    If ALL is in the plan of God (and I'm certain you believe that part), then, could it also be your job is a catalyst for greater spiritual growth?  Now maybe you haven't seen or experienced the growth as yet, but what do you know of tomorrow?  Tomorrow you may be on a different level and experience the challenge from a different perspective.  Possible?  So if it is that very plan that he has for you then you are becoming, and will be, the spiritual person you wish for and also what he has planned.   YOU don't know how to handle it but HE does.  From where do you wish your strength?  From you?...or from him?  Of course from him.  Rely on his strength for you and the part "I don't know how to handle this anymore" becomes obsolete.   He will give you the strength.

Maybe you are experiencing the spiritual growth right now.   

Gary

[Deborah-Leigh]

We can not do anything to escape our trials and tribulations. They are appointed to us by God.

There is no quick short list of do's and don'ts to get out of our difficulties.

Babylon is in the business of do's and don'ts making merchandise of suffering humanity. There are 1,050 commands in the NT. Here in BT Ray points out it is all ONE. God is ONE and to try to follow after perky Scripture pick me ups often leads us further into the deception that we have free will and further away from the recognition that we don't.

We all need His Spirit to overcome our trials. We need His Spirit to recognise our attitudes within our trials.  Gods gift is at work to show how weak we are and how much we need Him and depend on His presence for our comfort in overcoming our temptations. 

Our conditions are set before us to make us into His image.

We can do nothing without Him and finding this out is something we all have to experience in our struggle that will fail in our attempts to survive our circumstances  as we are brought by our failures to recognise that it is God who is working all things together for good.

May God bless you in your needs as you continue to endure the painful conditions God has appointed you to overcome through His Spirit Eileen. May you feel the comfort of His Presence.

Arc

[EKnight]

Terry,

Thanks for putting my problems in perspective.  You are right.  There are people out there who would love to have just any job at this point.  I am not offended in the least, but I am ashamed for having the nerve to complain at all.

Gary,

I see your point.  And of course it is God whom I want to rectify this situation inside me.  If I could do it myself, it would have already been done. 

George,

Thanks for the encouraging scripture.  I wish those sentiments came to me naturally.  It's always a struggle for me to be cognizant of God's plan for the other people whose paths cross with mine.

Arc,

You are so right, God is working in us all for the good.  Sometimes I have a problem with the time it takes.  Patience---not a virtue for me.


To all of you,  I never meant to imply that I see this as a trial.  Oh no, this is just a small struggle that is happening between the spirit in me and my carnal mind.  It is just that it is a five day a week struggle and it just didn't seem to be getting better.  Perhaps Gary is right and Eileen is trying to hard to do it without calling on the Lord for help and thereby not recognizing His sovereignty. 

Thanks again,
Eileen

[Deborah-Leigh]

Just a thought.

We know non of us have free will to be or to become who we would imagine we would be happy being or becoming. The carnal mind knows nothing of God who knows the hearts of those we are among in our work or life situations. They too might be having a silent struggle with their conditions that they too can not escape. They may despise it that we appear (to them) to be on top of things  because it is not revealed to them that you too suffer within. ~Appearances can be so deceptive!

Some people haven't the words to explain what they are feeling or why. We are blessed to have BT to open to us the wisdom of Gods Plan that brings us to the knowledge that we depend on God. That is a great gift we can not see or do not know that God may be sharing with others too albeit  in their early stages of seeing themselves as wretched and unable to change.

Your colleagues are doing and being what God has appointed to them. 

 I think God is blessing you to have the greater gift to know and experience your dependence on God that God may or may not have begun to reveal to your colleagues yet!

There is no shame in going through trials. It is the way through which we enter the Kingdom of God.

Arc

[Roy Coates]

I think your growing as we speak. You are being shown some weaknesses and your are dealing with them. Just like we read in (Jas 5:16)  Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
Be still and know He is God. He is training you. I will pray for your peace and understanding. And the courage and strength you need to endure.

[arion]

If the Lord works in you the way He works in me at times you will be able to look back at this some day and see some real spiritual growth in the end.  As Ray has said so often that sometimes we have to 'look back' as the Apostle John did in Rev.  I went through an awful period where the IRS levied me for taxes that they said I owed that were more than 10 years old (past the statute of limitations and therefore should of been uncollectable) and they allowed me to keep $630 a month and took everything else.  This lasted for 18 months.  It was miserable.  Yet seeing all the economic storm clouds surrounding us I 'look behind me' and am thankful for the experience with the IRS.  The Lord enabled me to make do with what I had and to learn to be content in the situation.  I didn't feel blessed at the time but now I know it was the Lord's plan and I'm better off today for it.

[EKnight]

Arion,

Your post is beneficial to me in two ways.  First,  I believe you are right.  Some day I hope to look back on this time in my life and see how it made me a better person spiritually as this is always my goal.  I also hope that I can be a light to those that I work with.  So far that is not the case and I pray that God works this quickly because I am beginning to hate myself.

The other thing you mentioned is Tax Levies.  Last June I started this job and posted how difficult it was.  I levy peoples accounts for the IRS and State taxes and restrain accounts for Creditors.  I hate doing it but as you pointed out, there was a silver lining but only looking back at it.  For the most part, I am very sympathetic to people when they call to contest.  I have no authority to release the accounts and I tell them that, but I can point them in the right direction and I suppose it's better that they are speaking to a sympathetic ear rather than a hardened heart.

Thanks for your encouraging response.

Eileen

[Terry]

Hello Eillen every since i replied to your post i haven't felt exactly right, you see i love being here and learning and the thing is i'm just a babe in Christ on milk and with most babies they just go around babbling and do very little talking especially anything we can understand as thats what most babies do, you see  i'm not qualified to teach anyone and i should not have even replied as i'm here to learn, i'm learning that if i take some time to think and listen i really didn't have to much to say anyway it's the carnal man that wants to speak right up and i am tring  to get a hold on that,i will still ask some questions but hold off on the replys  and so i apologize to you and ask for your forgiveness.

Terry Miller

[EKnight]

Terry,

As far as I am concerned there is nothing to forgive.  Your post was quite beneficial to me and I am sure it was God who caused you to post against your better judgment. 

Eileen