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=> Off Topic Discussions => Topic started by: mharrell08 on May 05, 2010, 11:36:09 AM
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The Butcher Shop
There is a clerk at the
butcher shop, he is Five
Feet ten inches, and he
wears size 13 sneakers.
He has a wife and 2 kids.
What does he weigh?
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Meat
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:D Very good Dennis, did you cheat? ;D
made me laugh!
Kathy ;)
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Meat
Correct!
Since that one was solved so quickly, I'll post one more for today. I'll try to provide the forum at least one a week...just for fun.
Mr. and Mrs. Wilson's children
Mr. and Mrs. Wilson have
five children,
half of them are boys.
How is this possible?
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Are they all boys?
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Are they all boys?
Correct! :)
You guys are good. Like I said, I'll try to supply one per week just for recreational purposes.
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I'll try to supply one per week just for recreational purposes
Can't wait ::), try this one...
What grows down when it grows up?
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The amount of fuel in a rocket?
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Great answer Craig,but no cigar.
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Can't wait ::), try this one...
What grows down when it grows up?
Does it "honk?"
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No, it is not a horn.
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Well now that I'm grown up, and have been for just a few years, it seems that every part of me is starting to grow down, or hang down.
Is it hair?
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No Roy,it is not,but Patrick is close.
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"grows up" I thought is said "goes up"
Patrick got it, "Honk, Honk"
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He did not get anything if the answer is not given :D ;)
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Goose
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BINGO!!!
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He did not get anything if the answer is not given :D ;)
Didn't want anything, just trying to help the others by giving a hint via a question. ;)
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He did not get anything if the answer is not given :D ;)
Didn't want anything, just trying to help the others by giving a hint via a question. ;)
Amen brother...
Pro 3:27 Do all you can for everyone who deserves your help.
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I was gonna say a carrot.
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Who was the king of all "the wise guys"?
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Who was the king of all "the wise guys"?
Gen 3:4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
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Solomon?
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Solomon?
yeah,he is really smart,and all from god.meaningful
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Solomon?
Yes Vangie,the correct answer was King Solomon...
1Ki 3:12 Behold, I have done according to thy words: lo, I have given thee a wise and an understanding heart; so that there was none like thee before thee, neither after thee shall any arise like unto thee.
Peace...Mark
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1Ki 11:4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father.
1Ki 11:5 For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Zidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites.
1Ki 11:6 And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and went not fully after the LORD, as did David his father.
1Co 13:1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
Arc
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a cowboy rode into town on monday, stayed 3 days and 2 nights and left town on monday.
How is that possible?
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a cowboy rode into town on monday, stayed 3 days and 2 nights and left town on monday.
How is that possible?
a cowboy rode into town on monday（Spent four days
）, stayed 3 days and 2 nights and left town on monday.
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The horse's name is Monday....or whatever he rode on.
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1Ki 11:4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father.
1Ki 11:5 For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Zidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites.
1Ki 11:6 And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and went not fully after the LORD, as did David his father.
1Co 13:1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
Arc
I hear ya Deborah. :o
1Ki 3:28 And all Israel hear of the judgment that the king has judged, and fear because of the king, for they have seen that the wisdom of Elohim [is] in his heart, to do judgment.
I think that contrary to what our own perceptions are we can not be all knowing as God is in the ultimate definition of what the the word wisdom describes. In 1Kings 3;28 we can see that Gods decision to grant Solomon wisdom is in connection with judgement and not in the Truths of the Spirit. In the biblical sense of the word I think that Solomon was given wisdom in the form of information and knowledge and not in the Truths. After all, he did die in his carnal ways, himself waiting in sleep, for his own judgement by fire, in the Truths of the Spirit.
Peace...Mark
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The horse's name is Monday....or whatever he rode on.
well done :)
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Mark, of course Solomon was a sinner. Obviously God knew beforehand and STIll gave Solomon the gift of Wisdom. How lucky we are to receive gifts even though we squander them and yet, there is hope for us. We suffer our consequences which is only right but God continues to love us knowing we are made from dust and a sin nature.
I do have a question. Isn't there a verse that states God doesn't deal with us according to our iniquitys???
Thanks, Judy
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I do have a question. Isn't there a verse that states God doesn't deal with us according to our iniquitys???
Is this the verse Judy?
Psa 103:10 He has not dealt with us according to our sins, nor rewarded us according to our iniquities.
Peace...Mark
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Hi Mark
I have always enjoyed your contribution in the Forum. :)
I see your point.
Solomon had the wisdom of God yet the application to his own life was not given to him in accord to the Plan of God which is to admonish us.
Php 2:13 For it is God Himself whose power creates within you the desire to do His gracious will and also brings about the accomplishment of the desire. 8)
Solomon had the wisdom but not the accomplishment.
Arc
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Mark and Arcturus, could you run that by me once more. I don't get it.
Thanks
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Mat 10:16 Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be as wise as serpents and as harmless as doves.
1 Cor 13:4-8 Love is kind and patient, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil. Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting. Love never fails! [CEV]
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Hi Judy
1Ki 11:6 And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD,
How wise was that?
Sure he had wisdom and his wisdom was great, yet not enough to save him. Only the Spirit of Christ converts, saves and transforms us into His Image giving us the capacity, desire and accomplishment of obedience to Him. Ref Scriptures presented by soberxp 8)
Without Christ and the Faith OF Christ, we can not be as sheep midst wolves or unselfish, supportive, loyal, hopeful, trusting and kind. We need the Spirit of Christ who's meat it is to obey the Will of God and that is pleasing to God the Father.
Arc
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Well put Deborah.
Even though Solomon had been given much of God, he still was a man after his own carnal lusts of the heart and not given the Truths of the Spirit. He may have been a worldly king,a king of treasures built upon earthly sands,but none the less, he will still go to the lake of fire to learn right from wrong,where real treasure will be found... That is to say,Christ Jesus.
Mar 8:36 What will you gain, if you own the whole world but destroy yourself?
Luk 9:24 If you want to save your life, you will destroy it. But if you give up your life for me, you will save it.
Mat 16:26 For what profit has a man, if he gets all the world with the loss of his life? or what will a man give in exchange for his life?
Peace...Mark
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And I thought Moe was the wisest. Not the same page; oh! okay.
Roy
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Well put Deborah.
Even though Solomon had been given much of God, he still was a man after his own carnal lusts of the heart and not given the Truths of the Spirit. He may have been a worldly king,a king of treasures built upon earthly sands,but none the less, he will still go to the lake of fire to learn right from wrong,where real treasure will be found... That is to say,Christ Jesus.
Mar 8:36 What will you gain, if you own the whole world but destroy yourself?
Luk 9:24 If you want to save your life, you will destroy it. But if you give up your life for me, you will save it.
Mat 16:26 For what profit has a man, if he gets all the world with the loss of his life? or what will a man give in exchange for his life?
Peace...Mark
ke.... ke.... Solomon ,if you own the whole world but destroy yourself in false faith.
ke.... ke.... Solomon ,If you want to save your life, you will destroy false faith in you. But if you give up your false faith for LORD, GOD, Christ Jesus,
ha....ha.....you will save yourself in faith.
don't get me wrong..................................just want to express
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And I thought Moe was the wisest. Not the same page; oh! okay.
absolutely hysterical roy! made me laugh outloud. a pure and hearty laugh is like medicine. thanks bra!
claudia
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Arcturus, I see a good part of this, the NOT accomplishing part of Solomon. And the part wherby Christ gives us the overcoming. What confuses me is the 'plan of God to admonish us
But if God doesn't deal with us according to our iniquities (and this was way back in the time of psalms) then how is it that He admonishes us? Does God just keep heaping more on us even after suffering our consequences like David?
This isn't sounding too clear here but how does one determine if a Christian has accomplished?
Is it by keeping the faith? Did Solomon keep the faith even though he messed up. I know David did and this was David's son.
I know people couldn't save themselves back then but it sure appears God admonished them.
I don't even know what the question is now!!! But hopefully you can translate.
It sounds a bit like the old covenant had no mercy but that's not true.
Yikes, Judy
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I hear you Judy. I know your pain and your cry is a cry of anguish, and is dear to the heart of God Who is Love.
I can receive your pain into my own soul for in this way we rise into a life in Christ. Breathing in the heartache of pain not the stony hearts of denial or the self justified thoughts of law makers appeasing their fears with self gratifying agreement that you get only what you ask for and boy oh boy, they asked for it! Or, you get what you choose or you reap what you sow and you are blind because of the sin of your parents. Oh no! Not that. You are in the state you are in for the Glory of God! God is your cause, purpose plan and salvation. This Is how to receive the brethren. It is not to go and give a cookie to a serial killer locked up in maximum security or giving a sermon to poor hopeless widows. See God is all in all.
People refuse and recoil from seeing God in the epicenter of every crime, sorrow, loss, grief and death as having been authored by a Sovereign God who is not aloof or doting on peace meal platitudes of Oh I will pray for you or I’ll light a candle for you, or shed a tear for you or in the case of the one who can not tolerate such pain and turns away and prefers to thinking on those things only that bring a sense of unreality and partiality that bars out the God of all, doing all, causing all and Sovereign over all. Do you fight against every vitriolic attack on your comforts with feelings of satisfaction embracing thoughts of returned violence and vengeance towards your enemies and you wonder at the other parts of the world that are being drowned burned and violated by unrelenting waves of aggression and corruption. I know you don’t Judy. Do you see God in the centre of your circumstances right there with you on your cross. The thief who sees God in the centre of pain, is the one who is assured the Paradise of God, not in the duration of the suffering but certainly upon the endurance of it in the mindset of the one who sees God in the moment of grief. They receive that assurance that can only come from God right there next to you ~ that release from pain and death is reserved in heaven for such souls who cry to God and recognize Him.
What can anyone do for you or I. Can you make me live longer laugh harder or cry less? Can you unhinge the pain centre of the human brain or stop the circuit of agony in the veins of flesh? No. Only God can do anything at all. Others will spit, throw stones, go home to their TV or other form of entertainment that God authors for them that may even take them into addictions of despair and deeper poverty of mind to try to forget, as they wage war on forgetfulness not being anywhere to be found because God is there in the face, getting bigger, bolder, better and the pain gets worse as death gets nearer.
Have you seen the unconscious in the streets that walk into you or take your parking? They are willingly unconscious of you and I. They care only to safe guard their own feelings. So they do battle a battle with Hades. We see them and meet them as sent to burn off our skins and whip lash our souls as was the very flesh of Christ scourged with the blasting leather thongs tipped in iron blades that cut against His Body as happens to ours.
I know your cry Judy. I know your pain. No forsaking you but right there with you, helplessly nailed to my own cross authored for me, right up next to you and others who are crying too, not against, God but to God. Your pain is mine too, and that by contrast is small compared to the writhing thrashing vengeful humanity pressed against the goads of carnal dissatisfactions.
God controls everything and everyone and oh The carnal mind refuses and recoil from seeing God in the epicenter of every crime, sorrow, loss, grief and death as having been authored by a Sovereign God who is not aloof or doting on peace meal platitudes of Oh I will pray for you or I’ll light a candle for you, or shed a tear for you or in the case of the one who can not tolerate such pain and turns away and prefers to thinking on those things only that bring a sense of unreality and partiality that bars out the God of all, doing all, causing all and Sovereign over all. How it hurts. I know. I know. It happens to me too dear sister. God is there, and here, and inside the core of our suffering, author and finisher of our Faith.
It is human to avoid pain. It is Godly to feel it.
Mat 24:12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold. Mat 24:13 But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.
Arc
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Mark, admonish, the definition has nothing to do with encouraging. I do see where my idea of admonishment was more like the word rebuke. Admonish is a more gentler reminder of a fault. So, when I was thinking more like rebuke I saw it as God coming down like lightening and scouraging the living whatever out of us.
Thought that was a bit too much! But to warn us and gently move us in another direction, I can handle.
I also see where your encouraging statement of the written word and the salvation of the cross is coming from.
Thanks, Judy
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Arc, now I see where the accomplishment comes from, comes from the indwelt Christ who gives us the desire and then ACCOMPLISHES it. So, Solomon didn't accomplish saving himself with his wisdom. God made him for judgement and not His glory.
Obviously Arc you sensed something amiss in me and did ADMONISH (my new understanding of it) me in a very supportive and understanding way. I think i know where i was coming from now. It is very easy to turn away from God to the world for answers. The promise though is that God will fulfill the original desire He put in us and work it out.
Going about trying to save one's life (thanks soberxp) from hardships is not the answer. Losing one's life for the sake of the gospel and God's glory at times is almost like a fairy tale. One cannot deny the biblical answer but the flesh sure puts up a fight. Over and over God calls but is ignored because the mind is brainwashed by misery and surely we think, God will just bestow more as if we comprehended God's thoughts. Surrending goes up for debate. Someone on this thread said to the effect, not verbatim, think with your HEART when the wisdom of one's wordly seeking mind does not bring relief. The heart knows it's Master.
Good answer. Thanks All!
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Arc, now I see where the accomplishment comes from, comes from the indwelt Christ who gives us the desire and then ACCOMPLISHES it.
Php 2:13 For it is God Himself whose power creates within you the desire to do His gracious will and also brings about the accomplishment of the desire.
Yes Judy. That is what the Scriptures say. God gives us the desire and He gives us the accomplishment of the desire He gives us. There are two actions in the Scripture quoted. The first is Desire and the second is the Accomplishment. God gives both.
So, Solomon didn't accomplish saving himself with his wisdom.
There is a lesson right there in that fact. 8)
God made him for judgement and not His glory.
All will be judged ~ the righteous AND the unrighteous.
I believe and see that God will not permit His Glory to be tainted, corrupted or in any way manipulated by carnal man. As judgement is fulfilled in us through the purging repenting work that God does to make us into His image, then we begin to have a share in His Glory as the life of Christ grows in us.
2Co 4:6 For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.
2Co 3:18 But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.
The culmination of this is when Christ appears to us.
1Pe 5:4 And when the chief Shepherd shall appear, ye shall receive a crown of glory that fadeth not away.
Rom 8:18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
That Glory is the newness of the life of Christ in us. 8)
Rom 6:4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.
Obviously Arc you sensed something amiss in me and did ADMONISH (my new understanding of it) me in a very supportive and understanding way. I think i know where i was coming from now. It is very easy to turn away from God to the world for answers. The promise though is that God will fulfill the original desire He put in us and work it out.
We all have to experience turning away from God, thinking we’ve got it right and finding out we actually have it wrong, eating humble pie, eating crow pie and feeling the ash on our heads that Job describes to us through his anguish and his pain.
Going about trying to save one's life (thanks soberxp) from hardships is not the answer. Losing one's life for the sake of the gospel and God's glory at times is almost like a fairy tale. One cannot deny the biblical answer but the flesh sure puts up a fight. Over and over God calls but is ignored because the mind is brainwashed by misery and surely we think, God will just bestow more as if we comprehended God's thoughts.
I find that God is the source of our Endurance, and that Endurance is a Fruit of His Spirit I can not grow, attain or deserve. It is a gift and privilege to receive.
Surrending goes up for debate. Someone on this thread said to the effect, not verbatim, think with your HEART when the wisdom of one's wordly seeking mind does not bring relief. The heart knows it's Master.
Good answer. Thanks All!
I find that no words of human consolation can match the Presence of His Quickening Spirit within when there is a need for comfort, understanding and a measure of His Love to assure, balance and encourage. For experience I have found that the best most eloquent words of all our Poets put together, all our songs of Praise, fall empty as vacant hollow vessels without water but promising thirst quenching refreshments, by contrast to our Father Who can at a breeze, give of His Spirit and attach some importance to a bird singing, a caress of kindness found in an unexpected unlooked for place of obscurity and then….I get it…God is the giver of all that is good. I find Him to be surprisingly unpredictable, trustworthy and most kind. He has painfully shown to me that He will not be controlled or taken for granted. When I think I can just tune in to Him at my expectation, whim or fancy, then He’s gone! If I think we can find Him by picking up the Bible any time, then He quenches my strenght and sufforcates even my desire to read or pick up the Bible and He vanishes from out of His own Word before my dry stale eyes and hard callused assuming and course heart telling me that God serves me and I've got Him and we can reach Him any time I want, just like I can reach for a glass of water by turning on the faucet. God will not be taken for granted. I learned that the hard way and this lesson happened in my “ achy breaky” heart that only the sound, strong, pure Spirit of God strengthens, heals and makes whole. :)
Blessings
Arc
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. ..... where I continually need to center my focus. ...
I appreciate that you are getting some nourishment of God as He works through me Janine. It is the same for me, the need to center my focus on Him, as well!
Blessings
Arc
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Thanks, Arcturus! Your gift lies in observance, comprehension and the ability to translate that into practicality. An eagle for sure but well grounded. A gleamer who who can make a banquet. A loyal and understanding person who has survived the anvil.
Thank you God for Arcturus!
judy
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Hey Judy
I can feel your cup runneth over! 8)
Thanks, Arcturus! Your gift lies in observance, comprehension and the ability to translate that into practicality. An eagle for sure but well grounded. A gleamer who who can make a banquet. A loyal and understanding person who has survived the anvil.
Thank you God for Arcturus!
judy
Isa 41:7 And strengthen doth an artisan the refiner, A smoother with a hammer, Him who is beating on an anvil, Saying, `For joining it is good,' And he strengtheneth it with nails, it is not moved!
Such is the Spirit of Christ. 8)
We remain as vessels of dust carrying the joy of His Works through His gift to us and great nature and perfection that draws us to the accomplishment He foretells of His Spirit in us.
Joh 17:23 I in them, and Thou in me, that they may be perfected into one, and that the world may know that Thou didst send Me, and didst love them as Thou didst love ME. 8)
Deborah