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Thanks so much Arion, Dynamite and Dennis.
I share in the sacred nature of your relationship with Ray seeing as we were only but a virtual fold of his, I read somewhere that he was very protective of us, his own words.
Dennis of course sharing more would be years of a long-term m bond of friendship broken, so I appreciate your warm response, it will suffice.

Testimonials from some of our elders here, women, youngfolf, anyone really is what my spirit feeds of.

Just hoped to have a blueprint of godly living in today's society from my teacher.

Thank you

I got so upset one time I actually accused God of hating me. Out loud. Not sure that you can possibly smear His character any more than that. So you're in good company. I know the day will come when I will have deeper understanding regarding the suffering in my life, but today is not that day.

I've done that and worse.  Perhaps the following scriptures might help your understanding:

Romans 5:3-5
Not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

James 1:2-4
My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

1 Peter 4:12-13
Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.

John 16:33
These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.

Romans 8:18
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

2 Corinthians 4:17
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.

Psalm 34:19
Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.

I got so upset one time I actually accused God of hating me. Out loud. Not sure that you can possibly smear His character any more than that. So you're in good company. I know the day will come when I will have deeper understanding regarding the suffering in my life, but today is not that day.

I never met Ray. In fact I was not brought to Bible Truths and Ray’s writings and videos until 7 years after his death. But I have come to know Ray over the last 5 years, just as if I was there with him at his Bible studies and conferences.

 Ray was loving…you can see that in watching the videos. Ray was also brave. The kind of bravery that allowed Ray to in essence take on the “churchianity” and bogus “ministers” of God in the world. You don’t think that took bravery? He was brave because he KNEW that the Almighty was leading him into understanding and truth! I no longer wonder if the teachings on Bible Truths are true…I also KNOW that they are. What a mighty work God did through Ray in what is in reality a very short ministry.

I came out of over 30 years around or in the Worldwide Church of God…with their apostles and evangelists, and I thought all the teachings were true. When I witnessed the excesses of apostle and ministerial lavish spending I told myself that Jesus Christ is in charge of His Church and He will deal with all in His on way and time. I like others suffered under the three tithes and kept all of the holy days and sabbaths, but never ever felt I could meet the stringent law-keeping in spirit that was required, so I was usually internally miserable because I knew that God knew my inner thoughts, whereas men looked at the outward law keeping and thought of me as a good Christian. So I eventually left (my first love?)


Ray never said he was an apostle, or an evangelist, or to my knowledge ever said he was a minister! He was a teacher. God slowly led me to see all of the erroneous beliefs that I still held to even after leaving WWCG 20 years before (looking behind me at the voice?). Believe me, I am still somewhat in awe of the depth of understanding that God has presented to the world through Ray!

Ray was also humble. To me that is evident in watching the videos and reading the writings. Again, looking at the tremendous breadth of the understanding and truths that have been revealed through Ray could cause one to really be vain.  I know that WWCG ministers (Herbert W. Armstrong) reaked of vanity for what he (and the church) thought were truths from God. Ray’s humility was evident for all to see, if they wanted to.

Of course I, like many, wish Ray had spoken more on a variety of subjects…but evidently he finished the works that Christ had for him to finish or he would not have died. So, Christ through Ray and Bible Truths left a work that I never get tired of reviewing and reading and watching. Still learning from all of the material years after it was written. Truth is timeless (which word Ray would say is an oxymoron and the better word is eternal).

I have no problem at all saying I have learned reams from Ray…knowing all the time that it is Christ using that vessel to teach me what I need to know, but more importantly what I need to do.

So DaddysGirl, I hope this helps you a little bit understand what Ray was like…even though I never met him 😀😀.

What you see on the videos is pretty much what Ray was like. He had an IQ of 162 and could soak-up all this information. We were best friends.

Here is a short 14 second video of Ray at home (unlisted YouTube) https://youtu.be/yKyZkuZlvxs

God loves you right where you are Matty.  I am praying that God comforts you. 

I have always said as much as I respect Ray he really taught me nothing.  What Ray was, was the conduit that God used to teach me truth in his time.  I first came across Ray's tithing paper and as much as I wanted to I couldn't argue against what he said and I really tried.  Then wanting to read another paper I started on the Lake of Fire series and in part #1 when Ray said there wasn't a 'hell', I thought him to be a heretic and quit coming to the site figuring that even a blind squirrel finds a nut now and then.

Several months later I 'accidentally' stumbled across the website again and started reading the LOF series and the scales started to fall off.  First time I thought him to be a false teacher and second time God started to reveal his truth to my spirit.  The difference was that it was God's time for me to start understanding some of these truths and truly their are few teachers and websites indeed that do teach the full gospel of salvation for all of God's creatures in their own order.

Even today God brings whom he will to the forum and the website and maybe only 1 out of 100 glean something that sticks with them but it is enough.  Although I never met Ray I do consider him a spiritual father in the flesh but I wouldn't ever have said that he was my teacher or pastor.  He was the willing vessel and God did the teaching through him and even though Ray has long since passed yet he is still teaching today those that God is working with in this age.

You are in pain. When we are in pain, we complain. It's in our nature as carnal humans. I still do it. Not as much as I used to, but I still complain. As your understanding increases, the complaining will decrease.

I've been in a similar place for many years.  I know EVERYTHING you are going through.  The only difference compared to former years is that I don't stay in the abyss for long.  I go down for a bit during times of severe tribulation.  He keeps me there long enough to  humble me, to bring to the surface what still needs to be burned out, but also to show his strength:

2 Corinthians 12:9

9 And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

I am not particularly guarded.  I will share anything if asked or if it is relevant to the conversation at hand.  

These scriptures come to mind as I am responding:

1 Peter 4:12-13
12 Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; 13 but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.

1 Peter 4:17
17 For the time has come for judgment to begin at the house of God; and if it begins with us first, what will be the end of those who do not obey the gospel of God?

Philippians 1:6
6 being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ

1 Peter 1:3-8
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, 8 whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory,

God has revealed much to me during my period of isolation, and I am happy to chat more.  

Your friend in tribulation.  Much Love,

Ralph

I'll be praying for you Matty. It's always harder when something happens to our children than to us.