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=> Off Topic Discussions => Topic started by: John9362 on March 17, 2009, 08:35:08 PM

Title: Job at the FBI
Post by: John9362 on March 17, 2009, 08:35:08 PM

The FBI had an opening for an assassin.

After all the background checks, interviews
and testing were done, there were 3 finalists;
two men and a woman.



For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed
him a gun.


“We must know that you will follow your Instructions no matter what the circumstances.

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting In a chair .. . . Kill her!!'

The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could Never shoot my wife.'

The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions.
He took the gun and went into the room. All was
Quiet for about 5 minutes.
The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried,   But I can't kill my wife.'
The agent said, 'You don't  have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the
gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another.  They heard screaming, crashing,
banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the
woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.



'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said.  'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'

 :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D ;D...........and I really don't care if Musicman heard it before  ;)

Love you guys !!....John



 
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: gmik on March 18, 2009, 12:17:14 AM
 ;D ;D ;D

I had no idea what the punch line would be!! Too funny!!
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: cjwood on March 18, 2009, 04:01:36 AM
now that's funny!!!!  :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D

i truly enjoyed it. ahhh women. aren't we just wonderful  :o

thanks for the giggles,
claudia
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: aqrinc on March 18, 2009, 04:03:08 AM

LOL ;D ROTFL :o

george :-[.

Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: musicman on March 18, 2009, 08:01:07 PM

The FBI had an opening for an assassin.

After all the background checks, interviews
and testing were done, there were 3 finalists;
two men and a woman.



For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed
him a gun.


“We must know that you will follow your Instructions no matter what the circumstances.

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting In a chair .. . . Kill her!!'

The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could Never shoot my wife.'

The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions.
He took the gun and went into the room. All was
Quiet for about 5 minutes.
The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried,   But I can't kill my wife.'
The agent said, 'You don't  have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the
gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another.  They heard screaming, crashing,
banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the
woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.



'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said.  'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'

 :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D ;D...........and I really don't care if Musicman heard it before  ;)

Love you guys !!....John



 


Killer joke!!!!!!
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: daywalker on March 18, 2009, 08:22:11 PM
I've heard this one a few times before.. But it stills makes me LOL every time!

- Daywalker.
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Roy Martin on March 18, 2009, 09:02:46 PM
Wow! Daywalker,  I never did know what LOL meant for 2 years. I didn't want to sound stupid and ask.
 Learn something here every day.

 Roy ;D LOL
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Kat on March 18, 2009, 10:50:18 PM

Hi Roy,

FYI here are a few more, HTH.  But OTOH you way not be interested, W/E  ;D


Common acronyms and their meanings:

These are all abbreviations for specific phrases commonly used in informal written computer correspondence.

AFAIC       As far as I'm concerned 
AFAIK       As far as I know 
AFK          Away from keyboard 
BRB          Be right back 
BTDT        Been there, done that  
BTW         By the way 
C/C          Comments and criticism 
EOM         End of message 
FAQ          Frequently Asked Question
FWIW        For what it's worth 
FYI           For your information 
HTH          Hope this helps 
IIRC          If I recall correctly 
IMHO         In my humble opinion 
IMO           In my opinion 
IOW          In other words  
LOL           Laughing out loud 
MOTOS      Member of the opposite sex 
MOTSS      Member of the same sex 
OMG          Oh my God 
OTOH        On the other hand 
RL             Real Life, as opposed to the Internet   
ROFL         Rolling on the floor laughing 
SO            Significant other
TTYL         Talk to you later 
W/E           Whatever 

Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: musicman on March 19, 2009, 11:33:15 AM
There are a few more that I know but they are crass.
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: daywalker on March 19, 2009, 02:29:49 PM

Don't forget these two:

IDK  I Don't Know
JK    Just Kidding

I use those alot.. LOL  :D

Daywalker.



Hi Roy,

FYI here are a few more, HTH.  But OTOH you way not be interested, W/E  ;D


Common acronyms and their meanings:

These are all abbreviations for specific phrases commonly used in informal written computer correspondence.

AFAIC       As far as I'm concerned 
AFAIK       As far as I know 
AFK          Away from keyboard 
BRB          Be right back 
BTDT        Been there, done that  
BTW         By the way 
C/C          Comments and criticism 
EOM         End of message 
FAQ          Frequently Asked Question
FWIW        For what it's worth 
FYI           For your information 
HTH          Hope this helps 
IIRC          If I recall correctly 
IMHO         In my humble opinion 
IMO           In my opinion 
IOW          In other words  
LOL           Laughing out loud 
MOTOS      Member of the opposite sex 
MOTSS      Member of the same sex 
OMG          Oh my God 
OTOH        On the other hand 
RL             Real Life, as opposed to the Internet   
ROFL         Rolling on the floor laughing 
SO            Significant other
TTYL         Talk to you later 
W/E           Whatever 

Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Ninny on March 20, 2009, 05:26:24 PM
John! I just got a look at the joke Ahahaha! funny! definitely funny!! Oh, did she get the job?? ;D ;D ;D
Kathy ;)
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: musicman on March 21, 2009, 12:25:17 AM
Quote from: Ninny link=topic=9578.msg81143#msg81143 date=12375
Oh, did she get the job?? ;D ;D ;D
Kathy ;)
[/quote

No, but she received offers for employment from many other wives.

Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Kat on March 21, 2009, 01:25:10 AM

Okay Daywalker those were good ones too.  I added them to the list  :)

mercy, peace and love
Kat
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Ninny on March 21, 2009, 10:28:39 AM
MusicMan, thanks for the info!! ;D ;D ;D
Kathy :D
Title: Re: Job at the FBI
Post by: Deborah-Leigh on March 21, 2009, 10:34:20 AM
Thanks John! :D ;D