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=> Off Topic Discussions => Topic started by: arion on January 31, 2011, 07:20:24 PM
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Top ten peeves dogs have about humans
'1'
Blaming your gas problems on me.....not funny... not funny at all !!!
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'2'
Yelling at me for barking. I AM A DOG!! What do you expect me to do, whinny?
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'3'
Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out! Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
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'4'
Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Stop it!
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'5'
Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
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'6'
The slight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whooooooo Hoooooooo - what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
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'7'
Taking me to the vet for 'the big snip', then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
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'8'
Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
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'9'
Dog sweaters. Hello ??? Haven't you noticed the fur?
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'10'
How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth. You're just jealous that I can do something you can't do.
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Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know who's boss here! You don't see me picking up your poop, do you?
Every dog has his day. A dog always offers unconditional acceptance. Cats have to think about it!
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hahaha, those are funny... #6 is my favorite :D
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HOW DOGS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN
*Dogs don't cry.
*Dogs love it when your friends come over.
*Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
*Dogs think you sing great.
*A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
*Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
*The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
*Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
*Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
*Dogs are excited by rough play.
*Dogs love red meat.
*Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
*If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
*Dogs don't shop.
*Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
*A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
*Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
*A dog's parents never visit.
*Dogs love long car trips.
*Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
*Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.
*Dogs like beer.
*Dogs don't hate their bodies.
*No dog ever bought a Kenny G or Hootie & the Blowfish album
*No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.
*Dogs never criticize.
*Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
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WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN MEN
*Dogs don't come in drunk and expect loving.
*Dogs don't notice when you've had a bad hair day.
*Dogs understand when you cry.
*Dogs don't ogle the girls at the beach.
*Dogs like to cuddle as long as you do.
*Dogs don't bring old army buddies home on the spur of the moment.
*Dogs never promise "not to do it again"--whatever IT is.
*Dogs love you more than they love anybody else.
*Dogs never pinch waitresses in truck stops.
*Dogs like YOUR friends too.
*Dogs never act ashamed to be seen with you in public.
*Dogs don't spend Sunday afternoons watching football--unless you do.
*Dogs never get bored with you and look for someone younger and more exciting.
*Dogs don't bury themselves in a newspaper at breakfast.
*Dogs don't criticize the way you keep house.
*Dogs love you unconditionally.
*Dogs never correct your grammar.
*Dogs don't care how long you talk on the telephone.
*You never have to wonder if your dog really loves you.
*Dogs don't demand to control the TV remote.
*Dogs never make negative comments on your figure.
*Dogs never gripe about your cooking.
You're always Number One with your dog.
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my dog hates when the leash suddenly stops him while he is running full speed
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Why dogs hate their owners. :o :-\
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeH7FHe3PQU
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haha, the first post make me laugh and smile the most.
who write those things...
ha
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;D ;D ;D
These are great!!! Will make copies for sure.