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=> Testimonies / Prayer Requests / Fellowship => Topic started by: hillsbororiver on February 28, 2007, 12:21:57 AM
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Into the World (again)
That was pretty much my experience with the Adventist church, I did not blame them for me leaving I thought I was a square peg in a round hole, in many respects I had felt that way for most of my life. It was time to move on, there was no bitterness and really (other than the pain I had caused others) no regrets.
I started getting serious at work putting in all the overtime I could get and constantly trying to learn more about the Company and especially the division I had been fortunate enough to become part of. We were building a new Telephone Switching System that was touted as "revolutionary" it was a box about half the size of a refrigerator that could handle (hang on to your chair) 120 phone lines simultaneously! It sounds rather quaint now but in '73 it was huge. I was the 3rd employee hired (actually it was posted internally for interviews) in a Department that would eventually have well over 200 people, this made rising through the ranks rather easy as I saw every stage of development from the ground up, first slowly then accelerated as we grew.
Stromberg Carlson at the time was the world's largest manufacturer of independent (outside the Bell system) telephones and telephone equipment.
Even though I was a valued employee I was still very much into recreational drugs and boozing, sometimes life would be a blur and other times I would clean it up and devote myself back to weightlifting and martial arts, things I had dallied with since about age 13. Stromberg's was a subsidiary of General Dynamics and employed about 5500 people in Rochester and about 40,000 or so nationwide, there was a plant in Orlando and I wanted a ticket there in the worst way.
I would feel a spiritual tug at times, especially when I got in some kind of mess, I always seemed to get lucky when it came to running outside the law, there are too many examples to list and I really don't want to have it appear I am glamorizing some of the things that happened, let me just say He was watching out for me and even at that stage of my life I recognized it. I had read the Late, Great Planet Earth and some other Hal Lindsay stuff as well as other "Christian" authors. I was starting to think perhaps all religions held a part of the truth and it was up to us to search and figure it out. But the Adventist Sabbath doctrine was one thing that kept it's grip on me for a long time, not that I would obey it, just as a benchmark for who had truth and who did not.
I got my wish in '77 when Stromberg Carlson decided to move it's electronic manufacturing division to Orlando, I was one of a few hundred who were given the opportunity to go south, thousands lost their jobs in Rochester as they were scaling back all operations there. I was more than ready to go.
Florida
Things were going great for the first couple years in Orlando but my famous temper kicked in one day when a promotion I was counting on went to someone else, it was a shocker to everyone who knew what was going on in the Division but as I learned later not an unusual occurrence in the politics of the workplace. I up and quit, right then. See ya!
That began a trend of me being in and out of honest and legitimate work, I could justify anything by the unfairness inherent in the "machine" that is business in an imperfect, unjust and corrupt world. I would "hustle" in different illegal activities, tire of it, get back in the legitimate working world, rise up usually fairly quick then get angry with a decision or just get bored and leave. I repeated this cycle as well as my booze/drug to workout gym rat routine for years.
After a failed first marriage (it really had no chance) I eventually met my second wife who inspired me to more consistency and a little more temperance. She came from a Baptist background but thankfully was not a fanatic about it, eventually she started going to church as our daughter was growing up, I would go every now and then but never liked it, except for those brief few minutes when they actually would quote a little scripture. The Sundays I attended were very few and far between.
My Dad
In '87 my father was diagnosed with cancer, it was in an advanced stage but through radiation and some chemo they were able to arrest it, at least for a while. During this period I dusted off my bible and started reading again as it was 16 years earlier I understood little but it gave me a sense of peace, I started buying more "Christian" books, Dave Hunt and others involved with the Berean Call.
Two years later my Dad had a relapse and the prognosis was grim, he just could not hold down food and got weaker by the minute, he lived out his last month on earth in a hospital bed, I watched him deteriorate by the day. My heart was breaking by the hour as I knew he was not a religious man, never spoke about God or his feelings about what he believed the afterlife held in store. I was still in the Adventist mindset, no hell but no reward or redemption for my Dad, he had overcome a lot in life, was a good provider but I thought this is it for him.
This was a difficult time of course, but we all returned to our day to day routines and the sting would eventually dull, I was busy in an exciting relatively new job, traveling frequently. This gave me an opportunity when I was on the road to read my bible (still a dunce) and my growing library of religious authors as well as my history and biography books. Still lifting and working out I was using intoxicants less without even trying.
Tony and Chris Revisited
A few years later in yet another job, I was the Southeastern Sales and Service Manager for a manufacturing Company I found myself in Miami, I had looked in the phonebook before for my old friends Tony and Chris but never saw either of them listed, this time I looked and wow! There is Tony's name! I knew it was very possible in a city the size of Miami that it could be someone else with the same name but I dialed it immediately, I got the answering machine and there was no mistaking that voice this was Tony, or perhaps his son but it was a very familiar voice. I left my name and cell number and went on about my day.
By the time I ordered room service I did not receive a return call so after my meal I called back, this time that familiar voice answered, excitedly I rambled on "hey Tony this is Joe from Rochester, I am in Miami and would like to get together maybe tonight if possible!" Ahem, uh I think you want to speak to my Dad was the reply, I thought OK, it is Tony's son, but I found him!
The voice that greeted me was gruff and impatient, yeah hello who are you and who are you looking for? I thought this is the old man, what is going on? I told him uh Mr. V you probably don't remember me but this is Joe from Rochester I was good friends with Tony and Chris. Oh, I remember you all right, you're the guy who helped Chris get out of that p*** hole reform school or whatever it was, I always respected you for that. It made me smile a bit, once a Mafioso always a Mafioso.
Well, Mr. V I am trying to get in touch with Tony and Chris, can you get me a phone number? Sorry, you are about 15 years too late, meet me for lunch tomorrow and we will talk. Hmmm, this guy still could send a chill up my spine even though by now he was in his seventies. Sure Mr. V give me an address we will get together.
The next day at 11 sharp I pulled up to his business, he had a wholesale produce business that guys like him preferred mostly only cash exchanging hands and who knows what else is happening behind the scenes. Mr. V came out looking his age but still with a strong handshake and persona. He looked me up and down and said you take good care of yourself.
I am anxious as hell now, what is up with the brothers? He looked at me without blinking, the dumb ****s are dead, loved the dope, got caught up in the cocaine **** flying it into Florida from South America in their planes. I had those *******s all set up, there was the casino in Santa Domingo I used to run before I got all that Federal crap up in New York taken care of, I handed it over to them when I wanted to come back to the States. They got their pilot's licenses and got the bright idea to start their own business with that coke ****. It was probably Chris's idea Tony would go along with anything. Did they get robbed and shot or something I asked him? No, worse he said, Chris died shooting the crap in his arm, they were junkies. I swallowed hard as he continued, Tony was a lost puppy with Chris gone, he died of an overdose a couple months later, I think on purpose.
Head spinning, why the hell did he have to have his number listed I could have done without this information. Gathering myself I asked him then who was the Tony who answered the phone? Oh that's my son, he was born 6 or 7 months after the other one ****ed up. This guy has his head on right, not a follower and aces his schoolwork, he is going to be OK. Silently I thought the exact same thing might have been said about Chris 25 years ago. He went on to tell me Cindy and Bob (no longer the Irish schmuck I guess) were doing great, a daughter in college and a son in high school, football player, good kid.
He went on to tell me he was looking for someone to start taking over the business, I am getting too old for this **** I would love to get a guy from the old neighborhood, somebody I can trust. I told him my family is too entrenched in Tampa to consider it, my Mom was getting up there and we just had too much happening as my wife had her own business too. He smiled and said it would be worth your while. For some reason money was not a burning issue at the moment, I was stunned and a little sick to my stomach as his young Dominican wife served us sandwiches and iced tea, I managed to get it down and looked forward to being on the road again. A few years back I would have jumped at his offer.
My Mom
It wasn't long before my Mother was diagnosed with cancer, she went down rapidly, found it on her liver in November and she was in the hospital to stay in February, today (27th) is actually the 6th anniversary. Like my Dad she lasted a month virtually without eating, losing her grip by the day, I took a leave of absence from work so I could be there every day, my boss (the owner) owed me big time and appreciated me enough to pay me in full not having to take vacation time or any personal days. I was prepared to walk if he gave me any problems about it, he knew it without me having to tell him but I truly appreciated his willingness to help and his generousity, not many would have done this.
My Mother passed away on March 28th, the day before my birthday, before she died I asked her if she accepted the Lord as her Saviour (like a magic chant) just in case it made any difference, I was still stung by my Dad's prospects in the afterlife.
This was a very tough time for all, despite her handicap my Mother was one of the most independent and positive people I had ever known, all my friends loved her and she was so upbeat after about 5 minutes most everyone forgot about her physical impairment. It was not easy to watch her fade away.
Again the sharp painful sting turns into a dull void but life goes on, the younger people keep you going forward, keeping one busy and occupied.
I was happy in life, decent job a new house on the horizon a good marriage but this void was staying with me, something was missing, what is it? There was this constant knot in my stomach sometimes intense other times just there, it was more mental than physical but real all the same.
That fateful night (Aug. 2, 2005)
One of the hats I wear at work is Warranty Manager, the hurricane season can be brutal, in 2004 we had a lot of action and it was expected to be similiar in 2005, in August of that year as another hurricane alert was being screamed by the talking heads on TV I was at my computer and decided to enter a couple words and see what happens. I entered "Revelation weather" looking for any writings someone might have on weather patterns in the "end times." I was not prepared for what came up.
L. Ray Smith - Exposing Those Who ContradictL. Ray Smith exposing those who contradict Purpose for bible-truths.com ... Ray Critiques 3 Damnable Sermons on “Hell” and Explains the Lazarus Parable ...
bible-truths.com/ - 66k - Cached - Similar pages
I thought what is this guy selling? I will check it out and have a laugh or two. August 2, 2005 is a day I will never forget, I spent the next 8 hours soaking it in, this stuff somehow was brand new and familiar at the same time, my life has not been the same.
Thank you Lord for using Ray to bring these wonderful truths to so many Brothers and Sisters.
His Peace and Wisdom to you all,
Joe
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Hi Joe,
I must tell you that I have been very touched and moved by your story. It's amazing how you ever made it without being in prison, or on skidrow, or just dead. But God's ways are not our ways and if He can do this to you, He can do it to anyone. When we look back on our lives and what God has brought us through to get us to the point of no hope in ourselves, then and only then can we say that it's all of God. "Eph. 2:8 - For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:" Thanks again brother.
In Him,
Your brother,
Dwight
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Joe,
That was quite a story, to say the least. Thanks for sharing it was well worth the read and very moving as well. I can relate in many ways, especially the substance abuse, and driving under the influence. I too once had trouble keeping my eyes opened whilst on the highway doing about 70 mph and when I opened my eyes it was a little too late and even though I floored the brake paddle I still rear-ended a much bigger vehicle then my little Mitsu-Eclipse and I was able to cut across three lanes of traffic, exit the highway, and make a run for it. I was also lucky because my sister's house was near [they were remodeling it, and noone lived there at the time] and I was able to go there [I drove through the alley and parked it in her back yard] and get some sleep in the car. Yeah, my car was wrecked, but atleast I was able to avoid going to jail. Phew!
Even though I wrecked my car, I was like: "Thank you God! For saving me from jail tonight!"
Since I was way above the legal limit of alcohol.
Take care,
Sorin
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Thank you Joe. I just found out today that my son started drinking again. I never know from one day to the next whether he'll live or not. Your story gave me hope. I work on a recovery site and we just lost a young girl tonight from drugs. My heart was very heavy and you helped me tonight.
I thank God for what he has done in your life and in mine.
Please pray for my son.
Hugs,
MG
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Dear Joe,
Wounds sure do run deep. Not so much physical, but emotionally and spiritually....I think it takes a long time to heal. "7 miles" into the woods, and "7 miles" out so to speak. And I'm so happy you chose God's family and not the mafioso family. Even now, that we know that choice was preordained for you!
In His loving mercy and grace,
Lisa
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Hey Joe,
Thanks for sharing your story with us. Sometimes I am just dumb struck at the lengths He will go to, to draw us to Him.
Steve
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Hi Joe,
That was an interesting story, but I was really glad for the end to come,
as I knew what it would be :)
What a difficult life, God really puts us through it, but I think you will say it was worth it,
because it was the way that God brought you to the light.
And I think you would agree it makes the light so much brighter.
1Peter 2:9 But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.
Love to you, my brother
Kat
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Hi Joe,
That was an interesting story, but I was really glad for the end to come,
as I knew what it would be :)
Same here, Kat.
Thank you for sharing, Joe.
I will always remember our first introduction at the Mobile Conference in 05'.
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Joe,
What an awesome testimony. And God is not yet done. :) Thanks so much for sharing it with me.
M.G.,
I will be praying for you and your son. May God bless the both of You.
Sincerely,
Anne C. McGuire
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Hi Joe,
As I've said before, God is using you in a big way. Thank you for sharing your pains, trials and tribulations. I am feeling especially encouraged by seeing the hand of God operating in your life.
Love, peace and His grace to you.
Rene'
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Hey Joe,
Thank you for sharing your testimony with us! I was on the edge of my seat as you took us through the trials of your life.
You have a way with story telling. It is so awesome to see how God took you from such pain and heartache to a becoming a
person who puts his trust in God. You give me hope that God truly does work all things out for good!
God be with you and continue to heal you as He transforms you into the image of His Son.
Bless you! :)
~Paula
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Thank you Joe. I just found out today that my son started drinking again. I never know from one day to the next whether he'll live or not. Your story gave me hope. I work on a recovery site and we just lost a young girl tonight from drugs. My heart was very heavy and you helped me tonight.
I thank God for what he has done in your life and in mine.
Please pray for my son.
Hugs,
MG
M.G.,
I am so sorry to hear that your son is drinking again. I know that must be stressful for you as you are concerned for him.
God be with you and give you peace in the midst of the storm my dear sister. You and your son are in my prayers!
Bless you!
~Paula
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Joe
Thank you for sharing! Our Lord gave you a major run up to the quantum shift He had prepared in advance for you to step into with appreciation that was being built into the design for your life long before you were born! What a story of despair, hope, failure, pain and then seeing the light!
The righteous man falls seven times then God makes him stand. May you be blessed to keep standing from here on Joe! My prayer for you Brother.
Arcturus :)
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Joe,
Thank you for sharing your testimonial with us.
It has been a long road for you to see the light.
May God bless you and continue to make that light brighter.
:)
Iris
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Joe, I am so impressed by the wisdom you have gained since Aug. 05.
I wonder if the "chosen" can have a normal happy life before being dragged by God??
Thanks for taking the time to share w/ us. Amazing, God was w/ you every Step of the way!
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Dear Joe,
Thank you so much for sharing your testimony. It is a wonderful thing to see God's hand in your life.
From all that you shared there is one thing that touched me deeply. Your family had a lot of love and you were a wonderful big brother. Your parents had so much to overcome and yet they were able to foster a closeness and love in their children. When you told about how you ran into your house and immediately looked for your little sister, it broke my heart. I have an older brother, but he was a cruel and abusive boy and he did me much harm. Throughout my childhood and adolesence I longed for an older brother who would love me and I could never understand why he hated me as much as he did. It warms my heart to know that you loved your younger siblings. God bless you and keep you.
Sincerely,
Ursula
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WOW! and we wonder where Hollywood gets such ideas from to make hit movies! ;) I hated to see that Tony and Chris had died (As I have two brothers who are birds of a feather as well, almost like twins... they can't seem to live w/o each other and they are 39 and 40 yo; they are together as we speak as a matter of fact. They too have a horrible history of drug abuse and addiction, but, God healed them about 6 mos ago, after 25 yrs of abuse ontheri bodies. God is in the miricle buisness for sure, for my brothers as well as you Joe, and many, many others who are in this terrible bondage. ;D This gives me hope for them. No longer do you (and my bro's.) turn to heal your pains through the numbing effects of drugs, but you now rely on Gods' truths and like minded brothers to make you feel better when you need a fix! :D
That mafioso dad was stereotypical; until he asked you to pray for his youngest son ;D. And really Joe, you came from a decent home and you were a decent child; it just goes to show the extent that the beast in each one of us can go from innoicence to The beast!....AND BACK TO GOD AND INNOCENCE.
AMEN, AND THANKS FOR SHARING! I know that took alot of guts :D
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Joe,
Well, i just don't know what to say. Reading your story has shown me how blessed i am. What pain you have been through, but in it you can see He never left your side. He knew you before you were in your mothers womb!
God Bless You Joe and thank you for sharing and what a gift you have for writing x
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Dear Joe,
I don't very often post because there's just so much to read and learn. But your story moved me so it brought tears to my eyes. What a turbulent life you've had. No wonder you tried to numb yourself whenever you could! Thank the good Lord that He has protected you thru it all, and brought you home to His peace.
With Christian love,
Cindy
P.S. I also grew up in Rochester.
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To everyone who responded (and those who didn't),
I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all the kind and loving words you wrote, and for your fellowship here in the Forum. What prompted me to begin writing about my past is I started thinking of what my life might be like right now if the Lord had not led me to Bible Truths and open my eyes to the incredibly liberating spiritual truths the Lord has given Ray to share with us.
Every now and then in the course of my daily life I will observe (intensely clearer than I do normally) people interacting with each other and for a brief moment I will see them as untethered to any real Foundation without the Peace that I at times seem to take for granted, I will see folks that appear lost or embittered by the apparent unfairness in this world, the seemingly unsolvable problems in our present daily lives. Things move so fast, they seem to move faster every day, without having our feet secured on the solid Foundation that is Jesus Christ what do we have to anchor us? Our own perceptions, our own ideas, our own solutions, our own ideas of fairness, righteousness? Heaven forbid! I thank God I no longer have to live with all of that, being consumed with political or social issues, hating my enemies, seeking revenge or attempting to find truth and justice in temporal earthly things, I feel we are so fortunate to know it is all dung.
Often the thought comes up "do things really have to be this difficult?" Couldn't God have figured out a less painful way to create Sons and Daughters? Because He is Perfect His plan is perfect, this I can only know through faith and the example the Father gave us with His beloved Son. Do I fully understand it? The short answer is no, but through faith and seeing the depths of His incomprehensible Wisdom as shown through His Word I do really appreciate the gift of faith that I once thought I could only possess by my own supposed free will.
Thank you God for using Ray (and my fellow members) to let me in on and underline the fact that no matter what happens to us as individuals or to our countries, it is all temporary, eventually (even quickly) this all will pass as the fullness of our real future is closer to fruition than we often if ever realize.
Again, thank you all in indulging me through that rather lengthly testimony, I originally thought I could do it in three parts but I found it would be impossible after the first few paragraphs, there of course is much I left out but I do believe I was able to communicate to my spiritual family here how I came to be dragged to Him and give a sense of who and what I am and how I got that way.
Bless you all, your Brother,
Joe
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Joe,
Can't believe it - my second post in one day!
Just wanted to thank you for sharing your story with us. And wanted you to know that your testimony blessed me too. I have been stuggling with the idea that God causes both the good and the evil in our lives. Good -yes. But that He causes all bad in our lives was a hard concept for me to accept. But after reading your story and Sorin's and others I can see how except for the details of our lives we are all the same. There is no partiallity with God. He leads all of us through experiences of evil. And even when we are living throught the evil He starts drawing us. From our point of view we may only feel like something is missing from our lives, even though we don't understand what it is or why we feel that way. Gradually He leads us to the light. Only after the experiencing evil first hand can we appreciate how wonderful His light is.
Reading your story and others helped me get this straight in my mind, that yes, our heavenly Father does create the evil in our lives to teach us and to lead us to Him. Thank you for helping me to understand this.
With Christian love,
Cindy
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Dear Cindy,
Losing our all our Babylonian baggage takes some time, study and prayer, most of all it takes His Spirit to open our eyes and ears. I am thankful that the Lord has seen fit to use my story as well as Sorin's and others to be a light to you.
Thank you and may He continue to give you His Wisdom and Peace,
Joe
P.S. I hung on to the Sabbath business and the physical Israel stuff for months after "stumbling" onto Bible Truths, it seems so elementary now.
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Guys,
On the same note, I often wonder if my 8 yo son will have to 'go through evil' in the years to come as most others must go through in order to come out ahead spiritually...as his mom and daddy have had to come through? Then, I look at his young life and realize that he HAS ALREADY BEEN GOING THROUGH HELL ON EARTH, AND FOR YEARS ALREADY!. (He has been so rejected by friends, neighbors, church brethren of his age and from adult brethren, family friends, Christian homeschoolers, my side of the family has ignored him, and then, DH's side of the family (his 5 adult children and an ex wife) who LITERALLY SET OUT WITH A PHYSICAL SCRIPT OF (HOW TO STEAL HIS HEART) JUST IN ORDER TO HURT HIM...AND IT WORKED; even his neices turned on him. HE LITERALL LOVED (WTIH ALL OF HIS HEART) THE ABOVE INDIVIDUALS..., and all of these people will have to answer to GOD for why they didn't receive a little child, especially after they had his heart in their hands. He has been persecuted, hated, made fun of rejected, ignored, laughed at...you name it...at his young age; which obviously used to make his sad and lonely. So, yes, he has already been put in the fire and he is coming out of it just fine, and he is not bitter toward any of these people, he understands GODs' big picture and he just goes on with his life. He has been given (fromThe Lord) the ability to not dwell on these things and he has learned to accept them for the reality that they are...and with grace; and he knows that God is allowing this for now!!! God has blessed my DANIEL ISAIAH with much wisdom and truth already. Praise His Holy Named! :D
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Hi Joe,
I must tell you that I have been very touched and moved by your story. It's amazing how you ever made it without being in prison, or on skidrow, or just dead.
Had many close calls and I have been on the wrong side of jail cell bars but only overnight or until bail was made, then a series of events would happen and the charges would fade away. He was with me and eventually got my undivided attention without having to rot in jail.
There were times I have had to sleep in garages or a car and have been shot at and had some real brushes with dangerous folks who did not have my best interests or health and safety in mind. ;)
But God's ways are not our ways and if He can do this to you, He can do it to anyone. When we look back on our lives and what God has brought us through to get us to the point of no hope in ourselves, then and only then can we say that it's all of God. "Eph. 2:8 - For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:" Thanks again brother.
Thank you Dwight, that scripture is perfect Brother.
His peace and Wisdom to you,
Joe
In Him,
Your brother,
Dwight
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Hi Joe,
That was an interesting story, but I was really glad for the end to come,
as I knew what it would be :)
Same here, Kat.
Thank you for sharing, Joe.
I will always remember our first introduction at the Mobile Conference in 05'.
Hello Patrick,
I will never forget that either Brother, it was especially joyful for me when we met again at the '06 Conference as well.
Of course you and your crew treating my friend and I like V.I.P.'s at the International Bike Championships was very generous of you and is an experience I will never forget.
Thank you Patrick.
His Peace to you,
Joe
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Hello Patrick,
I will never forget that either Brother, it was especially joyful for me when we met again at the '06 Conference as well.
Of course you and your crew treating my friend and I like V.I.P.'s at the International Bike Championships was very generous of you and is an experience I will never forget.
Thank you Patrick.
His Peace to you,
Joe
Man, what a day that was; very emotional for me as you well know. Having the opp to introduce a fellow brother to the sounds and smells of nitromethane was one of the highlights of that day.
Running the quickest time in the history of the sport was way cool also. Then came the landslide to the other side of the emotions; knowing I would not be back.
Get this, the green bike, Jimmy's bike (the quickest dragbike in the world at this time), is parked until further notice. $500,000.00 worth of equipment just sitting in VA because of no money to go racing.
Larry is in Valdosta, GA this weekend for the 1st event of the year with his bike; if the weather is good, there may just be the FIRST 250 mph run in the sport. He has some new equipment and if it works, he will reset all of his records.
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Get this, the green bike, Jimmy's bike (the quickest dragbike in the world at this time), is parked until further notice. $500,000.00 worth of equipment just sitting in VA because of no money to go racing.
Larry is in Valdosta, GA this weekend for the 1st event of the year with his bike; if the weather is good, there may just be the FIRST 250 mph run in the sport. He has some new equipment and if it works, he will reset all of his records.
Patrick,
That sure seems like a sad waste, that incredible machine plus the diognostic lab/shop on wheels just sitting there must really hurt.
Sorry to hear that,
Joe
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Dear Joe,
Thank you so much for sharing your testimony. It is a wonderful thing to see God's hand in your life.
From all that you shared there is one thing that touched me deeply. Your family had a lot of love and you were a wonderful big brother. Your parents had so much to overcome and yet they were able to foster a closeness and love in their children. When you told about how you ran into your house and immediately looked for your little sister, it broke my heart. I have an older brother, but he was a cruel and abusive boy and he did me much harm. Throughout my childhood and adolesence I longed for an older brother who would love me and I could never understand why he hated me as much as he did. It warms my heart to know that you loved your younger siblings. God bless you and keep you.
Sincerely,
Ursula
Dear Ursula,
Thank you for your kind response, our family with all of its flaws did have a togetherness and bond that sometimes can only come through adversity, whenever one or all of us were hurting, in trouble or needing a hand it did not matter the reason there was need (self inflicted, stupidity, bad luck) we would became even closer as we tried to solve it together.
My sister Kathy who is two years younger than me did experience some practical jokes and teasing from me but she knew that I would look out for her and protect her to the best of my ability.
His Peace and Wisdom to you Sister,
Joe
Thank you Joe. I just found out today that my son started drinking again. I never know from one day to the next whether he'll live or not. Your story gave me hope. I work on a recovery site and we just lost a young girl tonight from drugs. My heart was very heavy and you helped me tonight.
I thank God for what he has done in your life and in mine.
Please pray for my son.
Hugs,
MG
Dear M.G.
I hope you are feeling better Sister, it is my prayer that the Lord heals your son. There was a time that just about every waking moment I was either using or thinking about cocaine, one morning I woke up and that desire was gone, poof! I am not saying I never tried it again but instead of feeling good it made me very uncomfortable, even to point where just thinking about doing it twisted my stomach into a knot.
His Peace and Comfort to you,
Joe
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wow Joe, that is such a sad but good ending story. I honestly couldnt stop reading it, it kept my interrest all the way. I am so sorry for the events that happened in your life, but I know its all in Gods hands but i felt so much pain for you thru the reading. Maybe you should write a book and maybe just maybe some teenager would read it and rethink their life. Who knows you might be the key for someone to change their life. I just want to say that it took alot for you to write this on the forum for all to read and I admire the courage you had to do it. I thank you for sharing it with us. My life wasnt like yours but I have done enough wrong n sin in my life I could go on for days n days of writting all of the horrible things I have done. I confess to my God and pray for forgiveness alot about my past right now because im so guilty.. Im so ashamed of myself and have a hard time believing I did that stuff. Right now you could say "Im the woman at the well" and not proud of myself at all. I intend on changing it all soon. I just listened to Rays what is marriage tape. I looked at scriptures that back his teaching up and I know hes right. I just need all the prayer I can get right now,in order to do what is right. I might start another thread with what is happening coz I dont want to do it on this one due to it belongs to Joe and his life.. So happy you found this place too Joe... As i was told by someone on here, I didint just find this site by accident that God led me here and I believe it!!
God be with you always
Debby
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Good morning Debby,
Thank you for your thoughtful and kind post, there certainly have been some ups and downs especially early on but the Lord is replacing the anger, bitterness & ignorance with patience, faith and understanding. There is no doubt I have a long way yet to go, there also is no doubt that the Lord led me to Bible Truths to jump start my spiritual understanding.
I actually read through the bible numerous times previous to "stumbling" here, took in many Adventist doctrines along with trying to make sense of all the "Christian" books from (but not limited to) Hal Lindsay, Pat Robertson, John Hagee, Dave Hunt, Elwood McQuaid, as well as Tim LaHaye & Jerry Jenkins. Nothing came remotely close to the EUREKA! moment I experienced that very first night on Ray's site and innumerable times since then.
The Lord has truly blessed us with the articles of scriptural truths Ray is providing, a lifetime of wisdom at our fingertips, treasure chests full of gold, pearls and the precious gems of understanding His Word were placed right before us with so much of the heavy mining already having been done.
Debby do not fret over your weaknesses (you are not alone) take up His yoke and feel the Peace that is His Spirit even as we are chastised, He is leading us to Him and a glorious destiny in the fulfillment of His promises, what you are feeling is the refining of your spirit with His Spirit.
His Peace to you Sister,
Joe