Hi Dawidos,
I don't intend to get involved in any kind of controversy regarding the Topic of Marriage, You might want to read the Topic Thread from General Discussions: I'm living with a Woman from 01/28/07. Be advised, That thread was locked. As a result of Ray receiving Emails from people regarding living together and calling themselves Married without the Legal Paper, also the thread from Jan. 2007, Ray wrote His paper on Marriage. That Thread and Ray's Paper on Marriage were included in some of my initial readings. Realizing that Jesus in John Chapter 6:63 says " My words or sayings are spirit and life"(paraphrased). doesn't mean We shouldn't get legally Married and obtain that piece of paper. Dawidos, Did you read Ray's article about being Unevenly Yoked with Unbelievers, that article seems to compliment and go well with His article on Marriage.
I copied and pasted an excerpt from that article(Unevenly Yoked) that helps you to appreciate that people usually don't get Married to the opposite Sex for Spiritual reasons. Most people get Married because they are Physically drawn and attracted to the opposite sex, they might be lonely(Men), long for security(Woman), closeness and Hormones that God created come into play. Someone can Marry someone and Be "Unequally Yoked with Them," even if they share the same Religious beliefs and interpretations. Believe me, I've been Married before(No Sisters, I'm not going to tell you how many times, ha ha) and was Married to someone with the same Religious beliefs, but in many other areas we were "Unevenly Yoked," having personalities that clashed constantly. So, the spiritual agreement wasn't enough to have a "decent" Marriage. Aside from Arranged Marriages, most people get Married for fleshly reasons(Carnal). Read Ray Excerpt below in Blue from Unevenly Yoked.
I have personally seen marriages between a believer and a non-believer that were more loving and equally yoked than some marriages between two believers. So we need to pay close attention to ALL the words of these profound Scriptures.
We can advise and try to help people see different aspects of a situation. We can relay our own personal knowledge of such things. But we should not get involved in being overly righteous in these matters lest we be guilty of "forbidding to marry" (I Tim. 4:3), which is a doctrine of demons (Verse 1).
The key is becoming "unequally yoked." And that can mean marriage, but it can also mean which church one attends; of which clubs one is a member; which establishments one goes to for entertainment; which TV shows become a regular habit; with whom one becomes business partners; Etc.
Never become unequally yoked with anyone, and always avoid: "unrighteousness, darkness, Belial [an epithet of Satan], infidels, and idols."
We've all seen matches made in heaven that didn't work out, and conversely, we've seen marriages doomed to failure from day one, that are still going strong (or maybe not so strong, but still going, nonetheless) after 30 and 40 years. Only God knows for sure how marriages will turn out. Birds of a feather flock together, but then again opposites attract. Marriage is an area best left up to the bride and the groom.
Below is an excerpt from Ray's: What is Marriage, notice the part regarding, it was physical, not spiritual and God joining them, also included definition of Greek Word Gamos(literally nuptials).
“What God has joined…” There is a point where the joining starts……here they are apart, and now we can put together that God brought the woman to the man, that’s like an espousal. Then he joined them together. How did he do that? Did He push their bodies together? Come on, let’s not get lewd. He joined them together as husband and wife in the garden, before they ever came together or had sex or had children.
God joined them together, that’s what nuptials are. You take a vow and what happens at the end of the ceremony? What does the minister usually say? I now pronounce you husband and wife. Why? Because they are now joined together.
Did they have sex? No. What did they do? They took the vows, they formed a covenant in front of witnesses, in a ceremony called a wedding in a public gathering. That’s what marriage is. It’s the joining of a unmarried man and a unmarried woman together in a public setting with witnesses, exchanging vows and making a covenant to be husband and wife with one another as long as you both shall live. That’s what a wedding is. That’s what nuptials are. That’s what ‘marry’ means, that’s what a marriage is, that’s what starts the matrimony of two people.
Now so God brought them together - espousal. He joined them together - this is a covenant agreement. Adam said in the presence of God and Eve (they are witnesses) this is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. That was not just a casual observation, that was also a spiritual statement of content and he says, and she shall be called my wife. Is that what it says? Well it actually doesn’t in the King James, it says “she shall be called woman.” But the word translated is ish-shaw maw-sheem and it’s translated hundreds and hundreds of times in the OT Bible as ‘wife.’
So God brought them together, God joined them together, Adam says she will be my wife. Are we having a little ceremony here? I think so. This is very physical and this is very verbal, there is nothing really spiritual about this. This is all a physical thing of exchanging of…… ‘I see what she is, I take her for my wife.’ God brought them together for that reason.
MARRIAGE: Gk. gamos - NUPTIALS, marriage, wedding. The CEREMONY and its proceedings including the ‘marriage feast.’
That’s the definition of marriage right out of the Bible. Now do you see sex, intercourse, or love in there? No. Let’s read it again, nuptials, marriage, wedding - the ceremony. CEREMONY……I want to show this to you over and over and over again, it will blow you away, it’s the ceremony and it’s proceedings, including the marriage feast or the marriage supper or what we call in the western world ‘the reception.’
NUPTIALS: Noun; ‘A wedding CEREMONY’ (Webster’s Dictionary). Adjective; ‘related to marriage or the wedding ceremony.’
That’s the first definition by Dr. Strong, it is nuptials. It has nothing to do with having intercourse, loving each other, or producing children, nothing. It means a wedding ceremony.
The reason I decided to do this study, is because this person (email) is so hung up on the fact that ceremony has nothing to do with marriage. The fact of the matter is, what he thinks is marriage has nothing to do with the definition of marriage, 180 degrees opposite direction.
You can just go through dictionary after dictionary and Strong’s and you can look up all the words; marry, marrying, marriage, matrimony, look them all up, they all cross reference, they all produce the same truth……the wedding ceremony.
WEDDING: ‘The act of marrying, the CEREMONY of a marriage.’
It’s the definition of wedding, nothing to do with living together, rearing children, loving each other, having sex…...nothing. Marriage is ‘gamos’ in Greek and marry is ‘gameo.’
MARRY: Gk. gameo - ‘to WED, unite a man and woman in wedlock.
I would like to emphasize from my experience that prior to discovering Ray's Site in November 2007, for awhile, I was one of those who thought that a piece of paper didn't mean squat, especially since the Woman I'm Married to now and I got along so great together, had a personality that seemed to compliment and get along with mine, We think alike on most things. When getting Married(April 2007), We certainly didn't have too much agreement spiritually and the same degree of interest on spiritual matters, but we are more evenly yoked than anyone I've ever been with in a Marital relationship.
Well, Dawidos, hope this helped, unless I read something I think is extraordinary in further Posts from this thread, you probably won't hear from me again, unless you want to PM me.
Kind Regards, Samson.