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Author Topic: Having trouble coping....  (Read 1516 times)

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ralph

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Having trouble coping....
« on: December 03, 2022, 08:15:31 AM »

Hi folks,

I'm having a very difficult time coping with the sickness and depravity that I am seeing on a daily basis, especially with regards to the children. Story after story of children going through unspeakable things is really taking a toll on me emotionally, especially as a father trying to raise a young daughter.   It's difficult enough raising a healthy child, and is now becoming darn near impossible in this sick world. I believe I brought this up before not that long ago, but I just saw a story online that hit me hard. I am not putting myself above anyone else as I sit here and reflect on this because I know how sick I used to be and the things within myself that still need to be cleaned up.  I believe it's the depravity and sickness of the carnal mind and what it's capable of that is affecting me so deeply and how I long for Christ to come and put an end to it, both in myself and in the world.
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Wendy

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #1 on: December 03, 2022, 02:05:41 PM »

Hi Ralph

These are trouble times and they just seems to get worse it is hard when our families are affected and especially the children .I pray that God helps you through this.
Take care
God bless
Wendy
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ralph

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #2 on: December 04, 2022, 02:26:40 PM »

Thank you Wendy.
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indianabob

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #3 on: December 04, 2022, 02:37:17 PM »

Friend Ralph,

One way to limit the effect of the worlds problems is to avoid the news of the day and
focus our attention elsewhere. We don't need to be concerned over how it may affect us
or our loved ones, God is our protector.


Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me — put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4:8-9).
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ralph

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #4 on: December 04, 2022, 07:08:33 PM »

Friend Ralph,

One way to limit the effect of the worlds problems is to avoid the news of the day and
focus our attention elsewhere. We don't need to be concerned over how it may affect us
or our loved ones, God is our protector.


Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me — put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4:8-9).

Thanks Bob.  I don't spend a great deal of time on social media. These terrible things are happening so often now making it very difficult to avoid.  It's not just the news though. Things are quite turbulent in my life right now and I had a bit of break down.  Feeling better today. Thanks again Bob.
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Musterseed

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #5 on: December 04, 2022, 10:32:48 PM »

Hang in there Ralph. All things lead to God, even the painful stuff , much tribulation.

May God comfort you , In Christ, Pamela
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" No man can come to me,except the Father draw him"
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seaofglass

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #6 on: December 05, 2022, 04:24:52 PM »

Jesus Weeps over Jerusalem

41 And when he drew near and saw the city, he wept over it, 42 saying, “Would that you, even you, had known on this day the things that make for peace! But now they are hidden from your eyes. 43 For the days will come upon you, when your enemies will set up a barricade around you and surround you and hem you in on every side 44 and tear you down to the ground, you and your children within you. And they will not leave one stone upon another in you, because you did not know the time of your visitation.”

The entire creation will one day never even want to remember what sin is,  the result of sin in this life will be enough.   The glorious life beyond this is unimaginable.  Forcus on the goal.

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Dynamo54

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #7 on: December 05, 2022, 11:48:29 PM »

I agree that these are very tough times to watch what is happening in the world. I tell my wife that what is happening is supposed to happen as God has planned all and His will shall be done. She does not like to hear that because she thinks if we would all just repent (that free will thing again) that God will stop what is happening. I no longer tell her that it is not about what we can do to make things happen (I.e., WORKS). Even though I hate what I see, and especially to our country, I am sanguine about it NOW, after Ray’s teaching. I know that it will all work out in the end, and we will ALL have immortality with and in the Elohim family. What could be more wonderful than that?
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The Eternal, He is God!

ralph

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2022, 04:11:30 PM »

I agree that these are very tough times to watch what is happening in the world. I tell my wife that what is happening is supposed to happen as God has planned all and His will shall be done. She does not like to hear that because she thinks if we would all just repent (that free will thing again) that God will stop what is happening. I no longer tell her that it is not about what we can do to make things happen (I.e., WORKS). Even though I hate what I see, and especially to our country, I am sanguine about it NOW, after Ray’s teaching. I know that it will all work out in the end, and we will ALL have immortality with and in the Elohim family. What could be more wonderful than that?

Yes, I know all will be right in the end, but that, for me at least, doesn't make the pain disappear.

Even Jesus was moved and wept upon seeing the people weeping for Lazarus, knowing that in a few short moments he would raise him from the dead.

These victims are alone in their suffering.  They don't have the same comfort that we have.  It's just a very sad thing to witness and from time to time, it gets the better of me.  Thank you everyone for taking the time and for your responses. 
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Porter

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #9 on: December 08, 2022, 03:00:42 AM »

Here's a great quote from Mr. Rogers.

When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “look for the helpers, you will always find people who are helping”.


Not only did God create evil, He created good too. It's easy to find the bad, but if you look, you can find the good too. Often, good and bad are in the same place at the same time.
« Last Edit: December 08, 2022, 03:09:52 AM by Porter »
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Luk 22:31  "Simon, Simon, look out! Satan has asked to sift you like wheat.
Luk 22:32  But I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And you, when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."

ralph

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2022, 09:34:12 AM »

Here's a great quote from Mr. Rogers.

When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “look for the helpers, you will always find people who are helping”.


Not only did God create evil, He created good too. It's easy to find the bad, but if you look, you can find the good too. Often, good and bad are in the same place at the same time.

I loved Mr. Rogers and watched his show often as a young boy.  His show helped me through some very dark times as a child, but I now look to the Word of God and Body of Christ for strength and advice. 

I am honestly not searching for bad things...  They are everywhere and getting worse (2 Timothy 3:13). 

It depends on what you mean by "good". Sure a lot of people claim to be good helpers, but when push comes to shove, most people show their true colors and only wish to help and glorify themselves.  Only God is good.  God tells us what we are here:

Romans 3:10-18

10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:

11 There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.

12 They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one.

13 Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips:

14 Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness:

15 Their feet are swift to shed blood:

16 Destruction and misery are in their ways:

17 And the way of peace have they not known:

18 There is no fear of God before their eyes.

I don't want it to be this way, which is the reason I become overwhelmed with with bouts of weakness and sadness from time to time. Again, not just what is happening in the world, but also the struggles within myself.

This forum is the only place that I know of (and believe me, I looked), where there are truly descent people that are seeking after God and want to do good. 
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Porter

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2022, 10:50:53 AM »

I agree, no one is good (absolutely no one), but that shouldn't negate the good God does.

Jas 1:17  Every generous act and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights; with Him there is no variation or shadow cast by turning.

If there is anyone here or in the world that is “decent” and “wants to do good”, then it comes from above. The relative is just as true as the absolute, if you understand all is of God.

The verses you are referring to pertain to “the many called”. It's easy to see the world is in a terrible state, but it's hard to see from the Scripture how terrible the many who call Jesus Lord really are. The many think God is talking about the world, but in reality, He is talking about them.

Mat 23:27  "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which appear beautiful on the outside, but inside are full of dead men's bones and every impurity.

Mat 23:28  In the same way, on the outside you seem righteous to people, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.

2 Timothy 3:13 is no different.


Mat 24:5  For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many.

My 5-year-old son said something to me the other day that really impressed me. He asked: "killing is bad, right? And only love is good?" Where did that come from? Not from me (my son and I don't discuss such complicated theology much :D ), not from the body of Christ, but it came from above. Such a simple truth that hardly any adult believes.

It's good to struggle, Ralph, the trial of your faith is much more precious than gold. If it's not trying your faith, it's worthless.
« Last Edit: December 08, 2022, 10:58:32 AM by Porter »
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Luk 22:31  "Simon, Simon, look out! Satan has asked to sift you like wheat.
Luk 22:32  But I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And you, when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."

Dave in Tenn

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2022, 04:57:59 PM »

God bless your little boy, Porter.  That was a perfect gift. 
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Heb 10:32  But you must continue to remember those earlier days, how after you were enlightened you endured a hard and painful struggle.

Extol

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #13 on: December 08, 2022, 06:51:04 PM »

Ralph,

The thing that helps me the most is contemplating the future, when King Jesus will reign on earth and (later on) everything will be made right. Christians in the west don't spend nearly enough time meditating on this; there are two main reasons for this, I think.

1. Our lives are more comfortable than any other generation in history, and more comfortable than most of the world today.

2. We read verses like Rev. 4:8 and they rest not day and night, saying, Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, which was, and is, and is to come...and think "Gee, that sounds like it might get tiring after a while." Or we think of "heaven," even if we sincerely believe in it, as some vague, faraway notion; that we'll be spiritual beings just floating around...seeing our relatives, yes, but not really doing anything; or we think of the afterlife as merely an extension of our favorite pastimes ("Ol' Uncle Dave is up there playing golf...") If that is what it is, we reason, then better to play golf here, and not have to suffer the pain of death. With the comfortable lives we have, these ideas fail to encourage much excitement, when in fact it is this life that is but a vapor, and the next that will have no end...and be far better.

In his latest letter, my Dad told me of a funeral he went to where a daughter reminisced about vacations with her departed father. My dad then wrote how he hopes to go on some trips with his sons, because he doesn't want to regret not doing something. In the same letter, he wrote about a recent visit to a cousin who is in poor health, and that it might be the last time. The letter wasn't overly morbid, but it carried the suggestion that this life is what it's all about (even though my dad shares my beliefs.) I had to remind him the Grand Canyon will still be there in the resurrection. (If for some reason it's not, there will probably be some better, more beautiful version of it.) He will have ages to visit his cousin, only he won't be in poor health; it will be a restored cousin on a renewed earth. Any trip he takes with his sons, or any visit to relatives, will be a more satisfying experience when done after death. Life will be indescribably better and unimaginably longer than life is now.

Even if we don't know exactly what things will be like, we know enough to meditate on it and rejoice in what lies ahead.
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Abednego

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #14 on: December 08, 2022, 07:27:31 PM »

I don’t really know anyone happy about the tribulations they’re going through. And if you’re not, you’re in good company. Jesus was pretty clear in the  garden that he wasn’t ecstatic about what he was about to go through.

Just going through my daily reading, and I’m in Romans now. I just passed by:

Rom 5:3  And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;

When I read this I think about what Ray used to say about looking back. When I look back, it is very apparent that I’m not the same person I was years ago. The amount of patience I have now has multiplied unbelievably. Although that isn’t hard, because I’m not sure I ever really had any.

Then the next scripture:

Rom 5:4  And patience, experience; and experience, hope:

I wish Ray had done a paper on this, because I’ll be the first to say I really have no clue what this actually means.  I’m sure there needs to be some translation checking, it just hasn’t made it to the top of my list yet.

It hasn’t been an easy trip, as it hasn’t been for most of us.  I think sometimes it’s good just to hear you aren’t alone.

The Israelites were in the desert for 40 years. So was Moses before he returned to Egypt. I guess 40 is important. Jesus was in the desert for 40 days. He packed a lot into a short period of time so I can’t even imagine what those 40 days were actually like.

Every now and again I get a thought that just seems out of character and comes out of nowhere. It’s happened a few times, and since I know all is from God I pay attention. It’s served me well a few times.

The other day I was going over something God had done in my life, and out of the blue I thought how long were the Israelites in the desert? Well, everyone knows that, 40 years. Then I looked up when God had done this in my life. 6/1/1983. Almost 40 years ago.

I got so excited when I realized there may be some light at the end of the tunnel. It’s been a long, hard road, and I’m certainly not proud of some of my shenanigans along the way. Or the way I have handled some things. I’m certainly not where I want to be with God. But since He does the drawing, I hope He’s drawing me to a new level.

Maybe being in the desert for 40 years means something to someone else here as well. I can’t believe I’m the only one on such a long drawn out journey.

I was also reading in Acts when they beat the apostles and told them to stop preaching about Jesus. They went away rejoicing. I really can’t wrap my brain around that one either which tells me I have a long way to go to get to their level. Considering how hard it’s already been, that’s scary.

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Dan 3:17  If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king.

indianabob

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Re: Having trouble coping....
« Reply #15 on: December 08, 2022, 08:04:04 PM »

Ralph,

The thing that helps me the most is contemplating the future, when King Jesus will reign on earth and (later on) everything will be made right. Christians in the west don't spend nearly enough time meditating on this; there are two main reasons for this, I think.

1. Our lives are more comfortable than any other generation in history, and more comfortable than most of the world today.

2. We read verses like Rev. 4:8 and they rest not day and night, saying, Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, which was, and is, and is to come...and think "Gee, that sounds like it might get tiring after a while." Or we think of "heaven," even if we sincerely believe in it, as some vague, faraway notion; that we'll be spiritual beings just floating around...seeing our relatives, yes, but not really doing anything; or we think of the afterlife as merely an extension of our favorite pastimes ("Ol' Uncle Dave is up there playing golf...") If that is what it is, we reason, then better to play golf here, and not have to suffer the pain of death. With the comfortable lives we have, these ideas fail to encourage much excitement, when in fact it is this life that is but a vapor, and the next that will have no end...and be far better.

In his latest letter, my Dad told me of a funeral he went to where a daughter reminisced about vacations with her departed father. My dad then wrote how he hopes to go on some trips with his sons, because he doesn't want to regret not doing something. In the same letter, he wrote about a recent visit to a cousin who is in poor health, and that it might be the last time. The letter wasn't overly morbid, but it carried the suggestion that this life is what it's all about (even though my dad shares my beliefs.) I had to remind him the Grand Canyon will still be there in the resurrection. (If for some reason it's not, there will probably be some better, more beautiful version of it.) He will have ages to visit his cousin, only he won't be in poor health; it will be a restored cousin on a renewed earth. Any trip he takes with his sons, or any visit to relatives, will be a more satisfying experience when done after death. Life will be indescribably better and unimaginably longer than life is now.

Even if we don't know exactly what things will be like, we know enough to meditate on it and rejoice in what lies ahead.

= = =
Good evening Jesse,
Great to hear from you once again.
Loved your comments and appreciate your understanding of the details of this life.
=
It is natural to appreciate a few good things in our lives when we have much deprivation, but it is also a trial of faith when we have been receiving so much in the way of blessings that we come to expect it and take for granted as our due.

That is one reason for the value of contrast that God arranges for us to experience.

Thanks again for your advice. Bob
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