Nole, thanks for your kind words man. I have two reasons why I'm courteous to you. One is because I always try to be courteous to everyone. My christian school taught me how to treat others by treating me the opposite of how they wanted to be treated.
And two, I've been in the postion you are right now, with the city full of gangs and violence and drugs. I was in the thick of it back in 92 and 93. I and my best friend had a friend who moved to California after our 2nd grade year. In 11th grade he came back, and we rekindled our friendship. Well turns out he had gotten into drugs and started up a KKK chapter. Other than the KKK, we had a lot in common. Well when the gangs found out I was his buddy, I became involved wether by choice or not. Everything for me peaked one Saturday night when we were cruising around, and got chased down by a car full of blacks who were screaming and shouting at us. They definitely didn't want to hang out with us! We raced through city streets at 65+ miles per hour, and out into the country side doing 90+. This is going to show you how much of a 180 I've done in my life:
We (the 5 of us in the car) each pulled out a weapon. Ball bats, tire irons, pipes, whatever was in the back of the Escort wagon we were in. We all pulled nylons over our faces and we had a spot in the country where we were basically going to beat these dudes down, maybe worse. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH US? WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?
Thank God the dudes chasing us gave up! I think they realized that the white dudes in that car were totally crazy beyond what they were and they just stopped, turned around and were gone.
A couple weeks later me and my best friend were hanging out downtown. We watched as two dudes got the beat down by a gang of blacks and whites. We hot footed it away (we couldn't help those two; a couple dozen gang members against 4 white dudes?) Well we thought we were okay. We found a pay phone in front of the county courthouse and called our friend I just told you about. We told him what happened, and figured he'd get a posse together and help us take care of the gang. But no, he was busy. WHAT? As soon as we got off the phone, the gang was right there behind us. They came running toward us and yelling. We heard "GET HIM, T! GET EM!" We ran. My buddy barely got clocked but was running fast enough that he was able to keep running. He ran straight into busy traffic and got away. As I was running, a dude jumped at me from behind and grabbed at my long hair. I was able to turn and clock him once and continued running. I had a couple dozen dudes chasing me. I also ran straight out into busy traffic, dodging and weaving until I knew I was "safe." Thank God those dudes didn't catch us! It's hard telling what would've happened.
Where were our "buddies" that night? Why they were getting high. We would've usually been high right with them, but for some reason we weren't that night.
But that's just a couple examples of why I'm a humble pacifist now. That happened 14 long years ago, and I've done a 100% 180 turn from what I was. That's why I treat everyone with respect. I also learned I run faster than black dudes!
I'm not sure why I told you all that for the whole forum to see, but I empathize with your opinions. (I realize you're not involved with gangs, it's just that environment can affect our everyday lives and our overall outlook.) But I don't think everyone can know where everyone else is coming from all of the time. But your heart is in the right place and you've got my respect. Thank you for seeing strength in me. You may be right about me getting a rough side for speaking freely, but that's their choice, not mine. I'm strong enough to take it.
Matt