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Author Topic: The Things Little Kids Say  (Read 2125 times)

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Arion

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The Things Little Kids Say
« on: August 27, 2009, 04:53:27 PM »

What, you ask, is 'Butt dust'? Read on and you'll discover the joy in it! These have to be original and genuine. No adult is this creative!!


JACK (age 3)
was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister..
After a while he asked: 'Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk? '



MELANIE (age 5)
asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, 'If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties.  Mine say five to six.'


STEVEN (age 3)
hugged and kissed his Mom good night... 'I love you so much that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window.'


BRITTANY (age 4)
had an ear ache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain
To take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her
Mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have to
open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: 'How does it know it's me?'


SUSAN (age 4)
was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. 'Please don't give me this juice again,' she said, 'It makes my teeth cough.'

DJ (age 4)
stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: 'How much do I cost?'


CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, 'I don't know
what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in it?'


MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: 'Why is he whispering in her mouth?'


TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, 'Why doesn't your skin fit your face?'


JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: 'The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt.'  Concerned, James asked: 'What happened to the flea?'


The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget

This particular Sunday sermon...'Dear Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. 'Without you, we are but dust...' He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little four year old girl voice, 'Mom, what is butt dust?'
« Last Edit: August 27, 2009, 04:54:49 PM by Arion »
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cjwood

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Re: The Things Little Kids Say
« Reply #1 on: August 28, 2009, 04:26:27 AM »

and out of the mouth of babes! very funny post arion. i truly enjoyed them all, especially the last one. and one day we will all be "butt dust". loved it.

claudia
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Astrapho

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Re: The Things Little Kids Say
« Reply #2 on: August 28, 2009, 07:40:07 AM »

Quote
This particular Sunday sermon...'Dear Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. 'Without you, we are but dust...' He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little four year old girl voice, 'Mom, what is butt dust?'

The previous ones had me laughing really hard, but this one was the killer!!!! LOL!!! ;D ;D Ahaha, some of the things little kids say can be so adorable...
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Ninny

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Re: The Things Little Kids Say
« Reply #3 on: August 28, 2009, 09:08:22 AM »

Let me tell you one that I KNOW to be true and I've got a million of 'em!!
I was teaching K-4 and K-5 in a small church school years ago and I told all the kids to draw a picture of themselves..they could be doing anything in their picture just so it was a self portrait!!

Picture this now, I hadn't lived in Alabama very long and to me the accent was so funny! I was from Arizona and nobody had that Southern drawl there!
I was looking at all the pictures and they were so cute, one little boy, I will Never forget this if I live to be a hundred..his name was Andrew and of course everyone called him "Little Andrew" (it's the South remember)
well I looked at his picture and I said, "Wow, Little Andrew! What a great picture, but that looks like a spider, it's supposed to be YOU!!"  He said, "Oh, it IS me!!" I wish I could draw the picture here for you because I can see it so clearly in my mind even after 25 years!! It was a little stick figure and one of the arms was really, really long...and had a lot of fingers on it!! Anyway so I said, "Andrew, if that is you, then what is this really LONG thing going out of your body?"  He looked up at me like WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??? and he said in the most drawn out Southern accent I have ever heard.  "That's my aaarrrmm and those are my fingerrrrs, and I'm drallllin' into the ground!" I left out of that classroom laughing so hard, I could hardly breathe..I didn't want him to see me laughing because he was dead serious!!  Oh, you would have had to have heard that precious little boy talking to really understand, but that was just one of the things that makes me glad I love kids!!!
Kathy ;)
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