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Author Topic: Something Thats hard to say  (Read 6973 times)

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lilitalienboi16

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Something Thats hard to say
« on: November 08, 2011, 02:29:11 AM »

So, I spoke with my dad and I spoke with my school counselor and on thursday I have a meeting with a health professions adviser. What I've been told by friends is shes going to tare me apart, this adviser is, and that she's going to tell me theres no chance in hell that I'll get into med school.

Well, my bio counselor already told me, that I won't get into med school with my current grades. I have a 2.7 GPA, and i'm told because it's so competitive that you need a 4.0 gpa to get in. Hah... right.. never gonna happen.

So i'm not the brightest tool in the shed, but I've got heart, does that count for anything?

My father told me, with what seemed to be not very much re-assurance in his voice that there was still a chance, but i'd have to go out of the country or maybe go into dental field.

So I guess I'm posting here to get this off my chest. It somewhat weighs on me, rather heavily to be honest, but I feel like somepart of me knew this moment would come. Atleast I THINK some part of me did. I knew my grades were not strong, I can honestly say I've tried very hard, i'm not ashamed in the effort I put into all my classes. If I could change anything it would probably be the hole I put myself into right off the start when I went straight out of highschool and into community college without caring for school, in fact, I did not even want to be in the classes I was taking. I was still in that highschool mentality of school is just a giant playground. That time period in my life, about two years, really hurt my gpa because I was just in school because its what you did, I had no desire to learn and had no direciton. Go figure, leave it to alex to decide two years after poor peformance to embark on what is probably the most rigerous most difficult profession one could possibly try... I could have perhaps spent a little less time playing games here and there too. Oh and yea, definitely got rid of some of those horrible teachers I had along the way which really didn't help me, but aside from that, these past four years, i think i've really tried my best.

So I guess its all in God's hands, like it always was right? Well now it definitely is but that still leaves me wondering...So After I get destroyed thursday at the advising session and told that I'm a complete failure, I think ill feel a little better because Ill be told something I already know >.> So where do I go from here? You all know I don't really know what else to do with my life, you all know I even restled with this choice of career. but this was the only road I embarked on, the only direction I saw worth taking and I Just don't know what to do. So what I am going to do is keep moving forward... even if there's no chance in hell according to everyone Ill get in because I Just don't know where else to go. Part of me is scared because... well, I can't quiet see what God is doing and even though I know in my heart I never had any control in the direction of my life, it's a little scary when you feel like the future is slipping away and God is okay with that. :/

It has been very hard to say these things because.. well a lot of them are personal flaws. I tried my best but I screwed around two years at community college which really put me in a hole gpa wise and I had poor study habits cemented from a life of no studying going into a career that requires perfect, flawless ones. It's also hard to admit at times that I played maybe one game to many when I should have been studying. Yet for all these things I knew, I was unable to change. I really tried hard and that's where I'm not upset with myself. I also think anyone who calls me smart...is just....... silly. I'm not smart, I'm just a guy with a desire to great for what he could accomplish.

Well thanks for reading, I guess I'm hoping to find some sort of inspiration, something from God. Maybe it will come from someone on these forums. Some really nice scriptures would help right now.

P.S. If anyone says something about me being depressed I'm going to throw my computer out the window.... I kid.. but seriously.. don't. Just because a guy shares how he's feeling doesn't mean hes depressed. Sure i'm a little upset with myself, A little scared, embarassed that I don't have the ability to get where I wanted to go and that I Will most likely let my father and grandfather down, not that I was ever doing this for anyone else, even them,  but that does just sucks on top of all the other suck. >.>
« Last Edit: November 08, 2011, 02:32:27 AM by lilitalienboi16 »
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1 Cor 1:10 "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment."

arion

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #1 on: November 08, 2011, 10:12:08 AM »

Well, there are many avenues in the medical field as you well know.  Just because you can't be a doctor doesn't mean that you couldn't do many other things.  Could you possibly be a PA?  Or get into nursing or being a paramedic, or a technician of some sort?  This may just be a blessing in disguise for you.  When you talk with the adviser she might have some other ideas for you.  If there is one thing that is in demand it's people in the medical disciplines.  Don't beat yourself over the head with this.  God is either in charge or he isn't.  He IS in charge of course so when one door is closed for you then he'll open another one in time.  Just be looking for that open door.

God bless!
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Dave in Tenn

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #2 on: November 08, 2011, 10:59:50 AM »

I've got cousins that took unusual routes to where they are in the medical field.  One became a pharmacist first, and studied at night to earn his MD.  The other worked and studied her way up the various nursing 'ranks', and became a Licenced Practicioner -- don't ask me what that is or whether they have them in your state, but here they can do pretty much anything a doctor can do in diagnosis, prescriptions and stuff and can have their own 'clinic' without a physician.  They do referrals for things over their calling.  The only reason she didn't move on to earn her full MD is because she no longer wanted to.  She was doing everything in medicine that interested her.

Linny mentioned natural medicine in your last thread.  I don't remember you replying to her in the thread...maybe you did in PM.  It's certainly something to look in to.  Her comment didn't happen for NO reason, even if it doesn't lead directly to that.

Your Dad's suggestion/encouragement shouldn't go unheeded either.  I don't know anything about the standards of foreign medical schools, but I can tell you that LIVING and studying abroad is one of the best things that can happen to anybody. 

Anyways, just some stuff to think about before you talk to your counselor. 

 
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Rene

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #3 on: November 08, 2011, 01:08:26 PM »


well, I can't quiet see what God is doing and even though I know in my heart I never had any control in the direction of my life, it's a little scary when you feel like the future is slipping away and God is okay with that. :/

I guess I'm hoping to find some sort of inspiration, something from God. Maybe it will come from someone on these forums. Some really nice scriptures would help right now.


Hi Alex,

Your future is not slipping away, it is just starting!  Whatever direction the Lord is leading you in, is all good.  It is natural to have a sense of "fear" for our future, because it is true that we do not know what the Lord has in store for us.  However, you can be totally confident that whatever our future holds, it is ultimately for our good because God is in control and He loves you. :)

René

Philippians 4:4-7-"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  
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darren

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #4 on: November 08, 2011, 03:44:48 PM »

Alex, is there a time limit on this matter? must you have a certain GPA at a certain period of time? Personally I have no idea. If time is not the issue then you have as much time as it take to get that GPA up to where it need be for your purpose. Your bio consulor said you wont get into med school due to your present GPA (present being the word here). What happen in the past you can not change IE, two yrs at community collage. I'm sure some good came out of those two yrs. Everthing is a learning experience. You said your not the brightest tool in the shed. I don't know about that. What I do know is that to even think that in your mind you might be capable of achieving this very high goal and all the time and effort that one would have to put into this dream tells me different. Your question on heaving Heart, Yes heart accounts for much. You said that some part of you knew this day might come. well, the day has arrived. The question is what are you going to do about it. The way I see it you have two options, give up or use all of that heart that you have and move forward. With Gods help a strong drive to succeed and heart theres nothing to stop you from making your dream become a reality. some of the most successful people in the world  people with huge dreams came true even though they were beat down by others. Telling them they were not smart enough, not tall enough, fast enough, too fat, too skinny or came from a broken home, too poor and or their GPA not good enough. Listen, the world is full of people who beat the odds who all had HEART to start. Take a look around, pro ball players, actors, doctors. How bout this one, The President of the United States of America I wonder how many people told him he was crazy? What kind of obstacles he had to over come? Who would have thought. Anyway this is a fork in your road, a test of your Heart and fortitude. How bad do you really want this. The only one that can answer that is you. If this is what God has plan for you and you want it bad enough then theres no stopping you.Personally I seen many who gave up and lost their dreams and goals. I for one. If this is what you really want then go out and take it. don't be one of those people who look back and say only if. God gives us this very short life and we must make the most of it. Keep the faith and my the force be with you

Darren
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zvezda

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #5 on: November 08, 2011, 04:29:23 PM »

hi alex, hope these will inspire you:
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=686716
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=675835

also, will you consider post bac programs? talk to your school counselor about this if you like:
http://services.aamc.org/postbac/
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lilitalienboi16

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #6 on: November 08, 2011, 06:13:05 PM »

hi alex, hope these will inspire you:
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=686716
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=675835

also, will you consider post bac programs? talk to your school counselor about this if you like:
http://services.aamc.org/postbac/

Thank you a million for these. I really appreciate it. It gives me hope, honestly and to know there is always hope is what I needed to hear.

To everyone else who shared words of wisdom, encouragement and some of the scriptures, thank you. If you have more, please do share and thank you for not mocking me or ridiculing me. It's hard to stare yourself down in the mirror and truly admit you screwed up or even why you're still screwing up. It's so hard to face yourself, to know your flaws and even worse, to try and change them yet feel like they just won't change.

I know God is in control, i believe full heartedly everything God has shown me through the expounding that ray has done here and honestly, if it weren't for this website, if it weren't for God having reached out to me through this site, if it wasn't for everyone here, I would probably truly be in despair and lost. I know I would not be the same person I am today and I'm thankful for this blessing in my life.

If there is one thing God did right with me, was to make me one stubborn ******* who doesn't take no for an answer. That's one thing about myself I do know well.

Thank you all of you, i read each and everyone of your words and they ment the world.

Kindly,

Alex
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1 Cor 1:10 "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment."

darren

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #7 on: November 08, 2011, 10:10:35 PM »

If there is one thing God did right with me, was to make me one stubborn ******* who doesn't take no for an answer. That's one thing about myself I do know well.

I understand what you are saying here. Remember God is perfect and therefore everything He has done and will do is always right for you, even if it seems like it is not so good for you at the moment. All according to His Will and on His time table. Just no way around this one.

Keep the faith,
Darren
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walt123

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #8 on: November 09, 2011, 12:43:42 AM »

Hello,LiLitaLienBoi16

After Reading your post, this is the first thing that came to mind.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6s75D6WIDug&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Just something inspirational.

Walt.
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cjwood

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #9 on: November 10, 2011, 03:25:42 AM »

all things work together for good, to them that love God.  :)  and, i know you love God alex. 

you've been given some excellent info in the post replies.  God loves you too.  :)

keep us posted lil bro.

claudia
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noeleena

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #10 on: November 12, 2011, 03:15:20 AM »

Hi,

Where do i start.

okay then,
Im 64. Have Dyslexia major,  had learning disablitys could not read till 13, nore tell time on clocks i did by the sun. could not do maths.  no social skills,

14 years of allways last in school no matter how many where in our class.

Yet at 17 i was 2 nd to top in our class when i left after 2 years of high school. yes i went in to the building trades. could build major buildings .make any thing timber or steel .

Hey i was one dumb kid could not do tests i would just shut down, write my name at the top right hand side  only because Mum had shown me how to,  hand it in & get 1 mark out of 100. & i thought i'd done well.

I have worked under some good men learned my trade  ran my own business employed other people worked at the Antartic & govt departments. Plus done   many other things, & worked on contracts at different places,

Yet hated being told by men what to do & yet knew i had to learn .

Now if i had said ill give up . i cant do what my hands can do then i would not have done what i was able to, doors where opened for me & not of my doing in many case's .

Plus many others details that have happened in my life, yes im one weird person .
 At a very young age i knew what i was going to do & my vocastion in life as far as work was concerned. & yes i'v done my  46 years .

A peace of advise dont be.... so ....stubborn you can not change & look out side the so called .......SQ.......because you may just get shown there may be other things that you can be .....called .....to do.

& dont let others put you down if they do then tell them if they have nothing nice to say then dont say any thing till you can.

iv heard these jackass's for years so now i tell them in our kiwi  langauge .......To bugger off,......

...noeleena...

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cjwood

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #11 on: November 13, 2011, 01:31:35 AM »

noelena i am humbled by your post. your words of experience and advice are honest, revealing, and full of tough love. thank you for sharing. reminders that were needed.

claudia
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JohnMichael

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #12 on: November 13, 2011, 07:22:38 PM »

Hi Alex,

One of the hardest lessons for me to learn (and am still learning) is that God is in control of everything - and that means EVERYTHING. Not just the big details, but the smallest ones too. You're exactly where He wants you to be. I hope that is of some comfort to you. :) Knowing that we're in the hands of Him who knows the ending from the beginning is a great comfort. He can see down the road where we can't. If you don't make it to med school, it could very well be that God is sparing you from a job where you'd be absolutely miserable once the rosy-colored glasses wore off. Try to think in the positive. Easier said than done, I know. :)

In Him,
John
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octoberose

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #13 on: November 14, 2011, 12:05:37 AM »

Dear Alex,
 What I heard you say is that you didn't take your studies seriously for two years (I'm assuming you were 18-20 years old) and then took pre-med classes that gave you a 2.7 average? You do know that God has blessed you with a good mind and intellect, don't you? Most people would have flamed out long ago, but you're still at it.  You are plenty sharp, you are a believer in  Christ and you have a journey ahead of you.  If God desires you in the medical field, that is where you'll be, but you'll be there with a story to share. I gave up on my dreams of being a nurse at 18 because I was blind in my thinking,  I was scared and I had a hard time working through science and math (kind of necessary in that field). I have regretted it so often, but God has used me in different ways. But unlike you, I know I did not give it my best shot.
 I will be praying when you meet with your advisor that you are humble and that you are passionate about what you want to do and why. A doctor who can learn, who can admit his failings, who is approachable- well, Alex, that's the kind of doctor I want (after you do your best in what God gives you to do).  :D
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lilitalienboi16

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #14 on: November 19, 2011, 01:40:07 AM »

Hey everyone, to update you on what happened.

I went in to see this health professions advisor. She told me, The odds are stacked against me. That's exactly how she put it and she said she doesn't know of anyone getting into med school with a 2.7 GPA.

She then proceeded me to ask why I wanted to be a doctor, why go to med school?

I told her because I want to help people, it's the only thing I can see doing with my life. I left out the part about how It would be a perfect place to show God's love and to share his word with people, to be among the sick and the suffering and really show them the light and love of God. Hopefully He will fill me with His knowledge in time, well more then He has already so I can also hopefully teach His word like every saturday or whatever at the hospital. That would be amazing.

I also talked with my dad today. He told me he was really proud of me, he told me he tells everyone how proud he is of me and what im doing and I had to fight the tears, it put a smile on my face from ear to ear. I couldn't let him see how much it truly ment to me because I was afraid of looking weak infront of him but i'm still smiling about it. It's the greatest thing my fathers ever told me, I'm so happy it brings tears to my eyes.

Anyway, I'm going to keep moving forward with this, odds against me or not. The odds were always against ME, but they are never against GOD! I have faith I will be where God wants me to be, I will get there in His time, and i'm moving forward not because I think I can accomplish this or that I have faith in anything that is my carnal self, but rather because I have faith in Him and I have confidence, not in myself but confindence in Him. For if God is for us, who can be against us?! His strength has always been my only hope, so I will hold my head up and have confidence, because nothing can stand in the way of God, not even all the odds in the world could stand in His way!
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1 Cor 1:10 "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment."

arion

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #15 on: November 19, 2011, 11:31:30 AM »

Good for you Alex.  Keep plugging along and God will direct your steps.
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cjwood

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #16 on: November 20, 2011, 12:37:14 AM »

alex i am smiling from ear to ear for ya dude!  place your confidence in Him and He will guide your path.  i do wanna say though that, i believe you shouldn't be afraid to show your earthly father any emotional reaction, good or bad.  you do the same for your heavenly Father.  i just think it could possibly be something good for the both of ya.  just my 2 cents. 

keep on jammin' lil brother.   8)

and keep us posted.

claudia
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spiritman

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #17 on: December 05, 2011, 04:21:33 PM »

I have a 21 year old son whose only aspiration right now is to stay up late with his friends and play video games.  I wish he had a little of your motivation.  You are blessed, so be patient and good things will happen  ;D.

Matt
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gmik

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #18 on: December 06, 2011, 02:56:02 AM »

great thread Alex, on so many levels.

Lots of good thoughts and wisdom here.

Noleena, thanks for your testimony.  glad to know another gal in her 6th decade on here ;)
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JohnMichael

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Re: Something Thats hard to say
« Reply #19 on: December 06, 2011, 12:27:17 PM »

Hi Alex,

I just wanted to offer some more encouragement to you. You are way ahead of me in your realization that you want to take your school work seriously. I'm 27 years old - not much older than you, but that's not the point. :)

I went to college right after graduating high school back in 2002. I wanted to get a dual major in Computer Science and Biology (dream big, right? :) ). In my second semester, I dropped out. I thought to myself, "I will take a break, work for a while, and try again later." Well, "later" didn't happen until 8 years later. For 8 years, I knew I needed to go back to school, but real life always got in the way. Jobs would promise that they would work with me, so I would be able to go to school, but they never kept that promise. It wasn't until I was 26 that I was able to go back. To add insult to injury, none of my previous credits transferred, so I had to start over. Dual credits I had gained in high school went right down the toilet. I had to helplessly watch all that studying and work go up in smoke. It was a very humbling experience. It also made me appreciate being able to do the work to get my degree.

Rest assured that the Lord is directing your steps. :)

In Him,
John
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