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Author Topic: need advise  (Read 1881 times)

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virginiabm

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need advise
« on: September 09, 2012, 11:01:25 AM »


   Hi all, I need some advise on what to do about being involved in my husbands faith. I am not part of it, but it seems I am being drawn into being around them, especially now that they are coming to our house once a month to have church here. I don't want to be rude to them by leaving out of the room when they are discussing what they believe. Yesterday they were here and I seem to have got myself caught up on what they were talking about, which happen to be the Matt. 5, the sermon on the mount.  I guess I really need prayer to learn to keep my mouth shut, because right now I am one against many and I'm not comfortable talking in front of people to begin with. I do know what i want to say, it just don't come out quite like I want it to. OH.. these people are my blood kin except one and two of my grandchildren come with them. I really need some advise and prayer to stay out of God's way.

                                                    Love to all, Virginia
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Rene

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Re: need advise
« Reply #1 on: September 09, 2012, 12:50:21 PM »

Hi Virginia,

Since your family members know you no longer believe as they do, I would be polite to them when they arrive at your home, but go and do something else instead of sitting in on their bible study.  If you are asked why you are not participating, I would remind them of the fact that you now believe something different. Of course, this may also give you an opportunity to reveal a spiritual truth to them if they continue asking you questions.

I'm sure your situation with your family is more complicated than I have suggested above, but until you separate yourself from their "church" group, you will always find yourself in that uncomfortable position of being the outsider.  Just my opinion.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Rene'
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Gina

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Re: need advise
« Reply #2 on: September 09, 2012, 01:25:24 PM »

I will definitely pray for you. 

I felt this compulsion to tell all my friends where they were wrong.  We all experience that in the beginning.

I would take Rene's advice and in addition I would calm myself by praying and speaking to God about what you're feeling and ask him to calm you down.

I will personally be asking Him to open someone's eyes in the group; someone who can empathize with you and who can share in your new freedom so you won't feel so outnumbered....   Yes, that's a great prayer.  But I bet you can't even imagine that happening.  lol  And I'm sure all of us can relate to that too.

(You're smart for desiring to keep your mouth shut--wish I had that desire when I first started.  Actions speak louder than words anyway --everybody knows that.)
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virginiabm

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Re: need advise
« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2012, 02:30:58 PM »


  Thank you Rene and Gina for your good advise, but I have in the past when trying to defend what i believe to my family, I would say to them that because they don't believe the way sunday people believe they want attend none of their meetings and i feel the same way about what I believe, that I don't want to be involved in what they are doing or teaching. now the holy days are coming and they are making plans for them. Oh how I need help! I know that the holy days are spiritually being fulfilled in us and not physically being done by us. I hope I understand this right, if not correct me if I'm wrong, Please. My family thinks that it is a salvation issue to do them or not, because it is commanded for them to do. Obedience to the commandments is how they feel. I understand them because I was there a one time. Thanks for listening and your prayers a appreciated. Virginia P.S. I'm glad I have you all to talk to.
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Dennis Vogel

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Re: need advise
« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2012, 04:48:32 PM »

Sorry Virginia, comes with the territory.

Mat 10:36  And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

It's highly unlikely you are not going to convince anyone of anything.

Just be a good wife but avoid their studies.

Rev 18:4  And I heard another voice from heaven, saying, Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues.


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Gina

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Re: need advise
« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2012, 05:02:29 PM »

Wow, you truly are between a Rock and a hard place -- but you know what?  If they come down on you for not celebrating just remind yourself that Jesus said that we're not to Lord it over others.  And if they persecute you for choosing not to join in their festivities, take comfort in the fact that you're experiencing a little of what Jesus Christ went through.  Now I understand what it means to count it all joy when we are persecuted.  Joy?  Yes!  Because we are in effect being affirmed as spiritual Jews.  Their words can't hurt you.

(I personally enjoy the dinners with family and things and sometimes I like to make those little pomander balls -- I'd even hang up decorations if I had them but I only do it cause I think it's pretty -- I mean, seriously, what are poor people who can't afford all that nonsense supposed to do?) 

We can pray that God brings to their recollection Col. 2:16-17.  We can pray that God opens their eyes.

With a big smile on your face, if you can manage it, read them Acts 14 on Thanksgiving and Christmas at the din-din table.  hehe  And tell them how thankful you are for that chapter!

Again, I know this isn't a laughing matter for you, but hopefully this will make you feel a lot better and will free your mind.

(I second what Dennis said.)
« Last Edit: September 09, 2012, 05:05:35 PM by Gina »
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space.ace.jase

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Re: need advise
« Reply #6 on: September 09, 2012, 10:04:43 PM »

Hi Virginia,

This is always been a tough thing that I have had to swallow my pride and keep my mouth shut when it comes to my family and the beliefs that they have. They are all normal church going folks who still believe in hell, free will etc.

It really is a tough position to be in but I have found not getting involved in the things they do and if they talk to me about these things I listen but that is about it. Remember though that if they ever start "attacking" you about it just say "well I believe differently and lets leave it at that".

One last thing Virginia is that you say you need to stay out of Gods way but remember that whatever we go through that this is where God wants us. Rest in his peace that ALL is from God and he will see you through!

God bless,
Jase
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virginiabm

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Re: need advise
« Reply #7 on: September 09, 2012, 10:59:57 PM »

  Thanks Jase and John,

I will take your advise to heart and the others as well. I guess my main problem is wanting my family to at least listen and read some of ray's articles. The truth just jumps out at you when you read them and i just want to run to my daughter and say read this and you will understand. I know it is all in God's timing not mine.

John I was involved with Garner Ted Armstrongs assemblies, but not for long. we found out he was cheating on his wife. There was a split, so we attended with a group Clinton N.C. for awhile. My husband can be over zealous at times so we were asked not to be apart of them anymore, but that was worked out over time.

God started bringing me out in 2005, which I began keeping sabbath and all that in 1996. God started showing me the spiritual side of the law and that was that for me and I don't want to go back.

I love God and I love the way Ray teaches God's love. True Love.

  May God Bless each and everyone of you with many Blessings.

                 Virginia
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Gina

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Re: need advise
« Reply #8 on: September 10, 2012, 12:11:30 AM »

You are sweet. :)  God bless you too, Virginia. 
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Kat

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Re: need advise
« Reply #9 on: September 12, 2012, 05:06:56 PM »


Hi Virginia,

You have been given a blessing beyond degree to have had your eyes opened to these truths. I believe our primary goal is "to study to show yourself approved." Of course it is God who determines the very few He will draw to Him in this age, sometimes we are blessed when someone we know is. Even if none of your family have their eyes opened now you are still a witness/light to them. Your knowing the truth and how they are deceived and that puts you in a situation of understanding that they don't have. And you do not have to preach to them to let your light shine, but you can get their attention by how you speak to them about everyday things, by using the knowledge of the truth to speak in wisdom and being kind and considerate.

But always remember there will be a time when they will look back and realize you knew the truth, when they were still blind. So you are an example now, but it may not be revealed to them until much later.

mercy, peace and love
Kat

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Arion

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Re: need advise
« Reply #10 on: September 12, 2012, 05:52:36 PM »

There is some good advice here.  The other thing to consider is the old adage that 'I would rather see a sermon than hear a sermon any day.'  They still have the idea of eternal torment/hell and all the other false doctrines that primarily motivate through fear which of course produces no spiritual fruit.  Let them see the fruit that the truth is providing in your life and they might just develop an appetite for good food as well!!  I came across this site two or three times before I was ready to receive the truths that are here.  Let the land lie fallow for awhile and it may yet produce a harvest.
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