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Author Topic: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?  (Read 6051 times)

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loretta

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Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« on: February 13, 2014, 11:33:42 PM »

Now my six year old is being disobedient, inspite of my stern words. ::)  She was reprimanded for throwing sand from the sand pit all over the garden.  Ofcourse she gets carried away when her friends come around but yesterday they threw sand right over the wall onto a passing scooterist who came in to settle accounts!

Does anybody favor corporal punishment?  When I was in Christendom there were folks who went strictly by the good book and they believed that if young children weren't taught to obey their parents who represented God here on earth then they wouldn't obey God when they were adults.  And the rod was the best way for really disobedient kids. First it had to be an established family practice, discussed and accepted by all in the family.  Then the child had to be warned and finally it had to be administered by the head of the family, in privacy, not in random anger, but in a determined but loving way, on the bottom. It had to hurt so that the child remembered.  Lastly the child had to be comforted and reminded of the reason for the punishment.  I thought it made sense, but I never had the heart to practice it. 

Now I'm not so sure about the logic.

What is the spiritual meaning for Proverbs 13:24?
« Last Edit: February 14, 2014, 02:08:07 AM by loretta »
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Craig

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2014, 07:47:57 AM »

Quote
Does anybody favor corporal punishment?

Yes
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arion

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #2 on: February 14, 2014, 10:40:38 AM »

For willful disobedience a definite yes!!  She is testing the limits and if you don't set boundaries she can't cross her disobedience will probably get worse.  If you look at it this way, the parent isn't called to be the child's friend...at least not until the child is an adult.  The parent needs to be the parent.  And doesn't God deal with us in the exact same fashion?  If we are willfully disobedient doesn't he sometimes use remedies in the physical realm to get our attention?  Even God uses corporal 'chastisement' but it's only for our benefit.  If our hearts are the same towards our children and we administer the chastisement out of love and for the child's betterment then it needs to be done regardless of what society may think.  One of the reasons imo that kids are so out of control is that parents have pretty much done away with spankings.
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Extol

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2014, 10:45:33 AM »

Spanking was superbly effective with my brothers and me. . . especially when we would do the deed during the day, and have to wait all afternoon until my father got home to punish it. Oh, what an agonizing wait! As a result, each of us got only a handful of spankings throughout our childhood years. The terror of the wooden spoon was enough to keep us very well-behaved.  8)
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John from Kentucky

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2014, 04:02:30 PM »

When I was a boy, we did not have ADHD, or whatever they call it when women can't get boys to behave.

We had strange creatures called "fathers".

I remember one time when I could not hear my mother.  It wasn't my fault!  I was either deaf, or I had that ADHD stuff, but I couldn't hear her when she told me to do something.

Well, my father cured me of my illness.  He laid hands on me!  Shazaam!  I was healed.  Praise You Jesus.

From that time on, I was able to hear my mother when she told me to do something.  My speech was also restored, and I could say 'yes Ma'am' when she requested some action from me.

I know the old days were evil and barbaric, and we're so advanced in the 21st Century.  But fathers had a wonderful healing effect on sons.
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loretta

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2014, 05:35:12 AM »

So the vote is in.  Spanking is the way to go. ;D

But you're right JfK, where are all the good men who will father a generation of godly people.  Often I've wondered if we women have usurped the role of men, have sort of emasculated them, in parenting and other areas. So we have a new breed of men who display their masculinity by violating women but can't say boo to a goose.  No offence intended guys!

But then I'm sounding just like those in Christendom.  This also is of God, part of his purpose to make us taste of the tree of good and evil.
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Dave in Tenn

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2014, 06:11:09 AM »

We still don't want to call evil 'good' and good 'evil'.  We need to know the difference!  That takes some measure of maturity, even if our years are few.

On a side note:

http://forums.bible-truths.com/index.php/topic,6479.0.html

I know she's only six, but just a bit of preparation.   ;D

What's 'babylonian' is taking that verse to ungodly extremes, I think.   
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Heb 10:32  But you must continue to remember those earlier days, how after you were enlightened you endured a hard and painful struggle.

Joel

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #7 on: February 16, 2014, 12:39:30 AM »

I agree with Craig.

Joel
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loretta

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2014, 12:45:17 AM »

We still don't want to call evil 'good' and good 'evil'.  We need to know the difference!  That takes some measure of maturity, even if our years are few.

Oh my goodness, that is so profound Dave!  It sums up so well, all that I have been thinking and feeling these past many months.  I could so expound on this - somebody give me a mike, quick, pls! :)  But then again preaching doesn't help, a good dose of experiential evil in the lof does it.  And an opening up of the mind to the spiritual truths of God - maturity, as Dave calls it.


What's 'babylonian' is taking that verse to ungodly extremes, I think.   

You mean whacking the daylights out of someone?  :D

Tks for that link, Dave. Everylittle helps, with the young ones.   ;)  I wonder if Taylor is still around at BT - he would have passed those tiresome teen years by now! And what a learning experience. :)

My elder girl was about 5-6 when I became a believer and all I hoped for her then was for her to be a missionary or a pastor's wife!  She was, and still is, a poster child for Christendom.  But as a mother I could see some major flaws in the design and I did everything, short of taking the rod, to rectify those flaws.  No, I didn't yell. :)  I did it the religious way - scripture and more scripture.  I got her bibles - children bibles, youth bibles, bibles for girls, teen bibles, you name it. And Christian books, videos, music and more - till she rebelled againt Christianity - or religion as I now understand it.  I became anxious for her.  I had been taught in Christendom that you have to pray if you wanted your children to marry godly spouses. So when your kids are in their pampers or even earlier, you pray not only for your kids but also for their future spouses, and their friends (positive influence...) that God will keep them pure till their marriage.  By then I couldn't keep up with my own prayer list!   What if, I thought, my daughter does marry some godly guy and ends up wrecking up the marriage, like Suzanne Hinn ( never mind that she eventually remarried Benny Hinn with great pomp n ceremony ) and some other top names in Christendom?  So you can imagine my relief when I stopped by BT and learned the truths of God and how there is nothing we can do one iota to change the will of God.  And that we have no free will to do whatever we do either.  8)
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Reg

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Re: Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child?
« Reply #9 on: March 06, 2014, 04:49:51 AM »

I thought I read an article by Ray (I could be mixed up about the author, sorry) on the meaning of the verse spare the rod spoil the child...the conclusion of the study based upon verses regarding the "rod" such as the shepherds written of in psalms by David (?) Was that it was to guide, correct...like a shepherd with his flock of sheep. I'm sorry it's been a while since I read the article, but it was interesting to see   that the popular belief that the verse meant  that you should beat your child was incorrect.   It also took into consideration of how God guides us as our heavenly father.  My job involves helping children and families where the line of discipline has crossed over into the realm of abuse, emotional and physical injury with long term affects.. It breaks my heart that most people do not parent as our heavenly father does and most are ignorant tho the true purpose of discipline, correction and guidance.   
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