well shoot

Porter · December 25, 2020, 06:27:33 PM

I've had an infection for close to a year now, and it's turned into sepsis. I was rushed to the emergency room the other week due to an irregular and fast heart rate. I was supposed to be sent out on an medical evacuation flight, but I stubbornly refused as I didn't want to be alone due to the pandemic and all.

Basically, my body is starving for oxygen due to my blood turning toxic with bacteria. I'll be admitting myself to the hospital on Monday and would appreciate if anyone would say a little prayer for my family and I.

I'm not terribly scared, and I've already said my goodbyes to my family in my heart, so I'm as ready as I can ever be. I'm more worried for them, especially my youngest son Rick. I hate the thought of him looking for me when I'm gone and not understanding where I went as he is only 3.

I'm currently taking some fish amoxicillin that I purchased online, hopefully that will keep me going till I can get to the hospital. I'm actually feeling better after two days of taking the fish meds.

My biggest hurdle, as strange as this may sound, is just getting to the hospital, which is 700 miles away. I hate going out into public due to severe social anxiety. I want to get over this fear of crowds and people staring at me. Maybe if you could pray about that, that would be awesome.

Musterseed · December 25, 2020, 06:50:18 PM

May God be with you and your family Porter in these trying times.
Praying for you my brother.

We love you.
In Christ, Pamela

Dennis Vogel · December 25, 2020, 06:52:38 PM

Absolutely will be praying for you Porter.

Rene · December 25, 2020, 09:00:36 PM

Hi Porter,

I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through but will definitely pray for you and your family.

Joel · December 25, 2020, 09:34:57 PM

Praying that all goes well and that you are on the mend Porter.

Joel

Heidi · December 26, 2020, 08:06:52 AM

Thank you for reaching out Porter I will pray for you and yours my brother.

indianabob · December 26, 2020, 08:25:15 AM

Porter, you will be in our thoughts and prayers.
May I ask why you live so far from medical help?
It would seem that with your condition you may want to make other arrangements.

Hope I'm not prying, just curious.

Indiana Bob

casey · December 26, 2020, 11:02:34 AM

Yes Porter we will pray for you
and your family.

Casey

Rhys 🕊 · December 26, 2020, 11:35:22 AM

Prayers for you

Rhys

Doug · December 26, 2020, 02:08:34 PM

Praying for you Porter.

Porter · December 26, 2020, 03:06:21 PM

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate it.

Quote from: indianabob on December 26, 2020, 08:25:15 AMPorter, you will be in our thoughts and prayers.
May I ask why you live so far from medical help?
It would seem that with your condition you may want to make other arrangements.

Hope I'm not prying, just curious.
Indiana Bob

It's no problem Bob for asking. I live in Northern Alaska and there is a smaller hospital about 100 miles from me, but they quite very often send people out to another bigger hospital several hundred miles away if it requires intensive care/surgery etc.

The village I live in does have a clinic and they do the best they can as clinicians, but they often have to collaborate over the phone with doctors for advice and prescriptions.

octoberose · December 26, 2020, 07:37:42 PM

I'm so sorry Porter for all the distress. Please go to the hospital now. You have nothing to fear .

HoneyLamb56 · December 27, 2020, 05:29:55 AM

saw your post this morning; my prayers for you and your family

Diane

Porter · January 07, 2021, 01:14:48 PM

They put me through a series of strong antibiotic shots in my behind, then they gave me oral antibiotics on top of that. My heart is still going crazy at times, and it causes me a lot of anxiety. Feel trapped sometimes. I've always been a timid person, so I'm hoping God will help me overcome that if anything else.

My family and I came down with the flu, but my wife thinks it covid as there have been multiple confirmed cases of it in my small community. Most of us have lost our sense of smell and taste, along with body aches and fevers. I had the worst headache of my life for nearly 2 days straight during this. Not even asking for healing, just courage or something to deal with all this. Maybe I'm more scared than I thought.

Thanks again everyone for the thoughts and prayers.

Musterseed · January 07, 2021, 02:37:21 PM

From LOF XV1
2 Cor.12:10.............For when I am WEAK then I am STRONG

WHAT? Is Paul crazy? When I am weak I am strong?

Yes, Paul is crazy, crazy like a fox! When we think that we are strong, then we are truly weak,
but when we KNOW THAT WE ARE WEAK, then God can make us strong. Listen how perfectly
the truly great apostles understood these marvellous truths of God.

Humble yourselves [admit your weakness] in the sight of the Lord and HE SHALL LIFT YOU UP (Jas.4:10
Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God THAT HE MAY EXALT YOU in due time.1Pet.5:6)
Ray,,, " Peter is one of my favourites, he likes to add details. He adds to James statement by saying
" in due time". Yes, God will lift you up, but not always today or tomorrow, but for sure in due time.

Admitting your weakness of being scared is very humble Porter and God loves humility.
You are indeed strong. Fight the good fight of faith , we love you.
In Christ Pamela

Dave in Tenn · January 07, 2021, 09:00:51 PM

Hanging in there with you.

octoberose · January 07, 2021, 10:22:24 PM

According to my friends who have already had Covid, your symptoms are pretty common for it. I hope you have zinc, vitamin C and vitamin D. I purchased hydrochloroquine just in case. I'm sorry you have to deal with this but when its over you'll hopefully be able to release a little of that anxiety. I'm praying you'll be just fine.

Dennis Vogel · January 08, 2021, 07:30:07 AM

Quote from: Porter on January 07, 2021, 01:14:48 PM
They put me through a series of strong antibiotic shots in my behind, then they gave me oral antibiotics on top of that. My heart is still going crazy at times, and it causes me a lot of anxiety. Feel trapped sometimes. I've always been a timid person, so I'm hoping God will help me overcome that if anything else.

My family and I came down with the flu, but my wife thinks it covid as there have been multiple confirmed cases of it in my small community. Most of us have lost our sense of smell and taste, along with body aches and fevers. I had the worst headache of my life for nearly 2 days straight during this. Not even asking for healing, just courage or something to deal with all this. Maybe I'm more scared than I thought.

Thanks again everyone for the thoughts and prayers.

You wife may be right - I think I had COVID a few months ago too. Constant mild headache, low grade fever, mild nausea, slight cough, weak and tired all the time.

Sounds like the flu but I cannot remember ever having the flu before and I never cough. It took about two weeks to begin to get better.

My prayers continue for you.

Porter · February 04, 2021, 02:05:36 PM

I hate to keep going on about this, but I just wanted to give a final update.

First, thank you all for the kind words and prayers. It helps a lot as I know we are experiencing the same things, spiritually speaking.

I was again rushed to the emergency room, and this time they sent me out on an emergency flight to the hospital. My heart was experiencing arterial fibrillation, and was determined to be caused by Graves Disease. I stayed in the hospital for 4 days as they monitored me and gave me medications to alleviate my symptoms. I'm back home now.

It's been an interesting experience so far, knowing all is of God. I've quit smoking, and cut down on caffeine. I pray to God that lasts. I had been actually praying for years that God would somehow help me quit smoking, but never expected it to be quite this way. However, my physical problems pail in comparison to my spiritual problems. I truly hope this is God's way of dealing with me as a son. It's all good, and I'm very thankful.
I'm still afraid at times for what's to come, but I'm constantly reminded about all the Scriptures that tell me to hang in there when the going gets tough.

I was actually re-reading one of Ray's papers (before this last emergency) which spoke about how Jesus compelled His disciples into a boat during a storm. It was a kind of foreshadowing of judgement on His Elect. They were afraid to do what Jesus asked, understandable so. Who the heck wants to willingly go into a storm in a small boat? I've been in some nasty storms in a small boat before, and it was indeed frightening. I wasn't given faith back then, so of course I was afraid.

I'm now in another storm, and I'm not always sure I'll be ok, spiritually. I know the Scripture that says to count it all joy when experiencing trials and tribulations, as it is a manifestation of God's righteous judgment. It's just too easy to doubt sometimes.

I'm so glad to be part of this forum. I'm so happy you love Jesus. Forgive me if I've been a bit terse at times, I'm still learning.

Peace

arion · February 06, 2021, 07:06:45 AM

You are right where you are supposed to be both spiritually and in the flesh at this point. If God is sovereign in his creation [He is of course], if he knew everything you would think or do before you were even born [He did] and if you don't have a free will to alter what God knows what must be. [You don't] then you are right where you are supposed to be and everything is running right on time.

That was a hard lesson for me to learn and I still have to relearn it or at least re-experience it quite often. Looking at the crazy things going on in the world today and life in general not a day goes by where I don't say to myself, 'if there was a better way for God to accomplish his plans both for me and this world in general then he would do it that way.'

It's tempting to play the game sometimes with hindsight [hearing that voice behind you] thinking about things you did in the past and how you might have done them differently if you had the option but when I hear that voice behind me I can turn, look and see that God was there all the time even though I wasn't aware of it. And in retrospect I would change nothing. Not that I've done everything right or even most things right but if everything that has happened to me was part of God's plan all along and if I am convinced of his love and provision for me why would I change anything?

It brings a lot of comfort to know that I can't mess up his plan for me and you can't mess up his plan for you even though we still see through that glass darkly.