Well Ray... I'll be honest with you... I'd be giving up a lot if I decided to flip my life and dedicate it to spreading His good word and I know that it is the right thing to do... but I'd be giving up lots of friends... I'm afraid of losing a lot of my friends... since it is easy for me to understand other people's perspectives than my own I always try and reason with people and concur with them... I feel like I show a different side to my personality to each different person i know... not that i am faking my personality but that's exactly what my personality is like- I have lots of friends because of this.... is it wrong to want to be loved by everyone? i guess I just don't know how I would go about my mission to spread the truth... I'm afraid of failing - I'm having a hard time BELIEVING in myself.
Dear Addison: I don't want to discourage you or put you down, Addison, but I would be grossly remiss if I did not point out a few things to you. Of course, at this time, your friends mean more to you than serving God in a way that my jeopardize you friends. In your case, Jesus admonition could have produced this scenario: "But when Addison heard that saying, he went away sorrowful, for had a great number of friends" (Matt. 19:22). Therefore, "If any man come to Me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren [many friends] , and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciples" (Luke 14:26).
It is not your time yet. I would encourage you to keep reading if you have that much of a desire, and let God lead you in His time to make the necessary decisions.
God be with you,
Ray