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Question on Phileo love

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seminole:
I don't agree that in marriage and children , the love is only because of reciprocation. If you love your husband or wife and kids because of something you think they will do for you that's wrong. You love completely or you don't. They can stab you in the back (figuratively) but you still love them. If you love someone because you think they can do something for you that's not love. It reminds me of politics.

hillsbororiver:
Seminole,

If you are married your wife appealed to you first, before marriage. You were attracted to her for a combination of reasons and you were drawn to a committment to bind your affection by matrimony. Your wife had attributes you desired before you loved her. As you go through life together hopefully the love becomes stronger as you provide for each other and withstand and overcome the obstacles life presents, as you do these things for each other the love becomes stronger and deeper.

There is a difference in definitions the English word "love" is used for a few different Greek words.

Here are a few; 

G25
ἀγαπάω
agapaō

ag-ap-ah'-o
Perhaps from ἄγαν agan (much; or compare [H5689]); to love (in a social or moral sense): - (be-) love (-ed). Compare G5368.


G26
ἀγάπη
agapē
ag-ah'-pay
From G25; love, that is, affection or benevolence; specifically (plural) a love feast: - (feast of) charity ([-ably]), dear, love.



G5368
φιλέω
phileō
fil-eh'-o
From G5384; to be a friend to (fond of [an individual or an object]), that is, have affection for (denoting personal attachment, as a matter of sentiment or feeling; while G25 is wider, embracing especially the judgment and the deliberate assent of the will as a matter of principle, duty and propriety: the two thus stand related very much as G2309 and G1014, or as G2372 and G3563 respectively; the former being chiefly of the heart and the latter of the head); specifically to kiss (as a mark of tenderness): - kiss, love.



G2309
θέλω, ἐθέλω
thelō  ethelō
thel'-o, eth-el'-o
Either the first or the second form may be used. In certain tenses θελέω theleō  thel-eh'-o (and ἐθέλέω  etheleō eth-el-eh'-o) are used, which are otherwise obsolete; apparently strengthened from the alternate form of G138; to determine (as an active voice option from subjective impulse; whereas G1014 properly denotes rather a passive voice acquiescence in objective considerations), that is, choose or prefer (literally or figuratively); by implication to wish, that is, be inclined to (sometimes adverbially gladly); impersonally for the future tense, to be about to; by Hebraism to delight in: - desire, be disposed (forward), intend, list, love, mean, please, have rather, (be) will (have, -ling, -ling [ly]).

Do you understand this quote from Jesus?

Mat 7:11  If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?


Joe
 

seminole:
I think I do understand that quote from Jesus. I understand that when you first meet your wife there is a physical attraction and it develops from that.  I believe that as you live together and face many tough times the love continues to grow. The truest love is when you love a person no matter if they can do anything for you or not. My grand-parents in law (?)
were a picture of this. His wife was sick and could do nothing for either of them. The physical attributes that would be considered attractive were no longer there but he served his wife 24/7 out  of love.

hillsbororiver:
Exactly Nole,

They experienced a two way street their entire lives, their love matured through trials and hardships (as all good marriages do) and the love that grew was stronger later in life than in the beginning. They learned to totally trust each other because they both experienced the loyalty and the sacrifices made by each of them through their journey together. Had one or the other been a cheating, lying, spouse beating, drug addict, alcoholic who was in and out of jail and never willing to hold down employment it is a safe bet they would not be sharing this type of love in old age.

This is a beautiful, wonderful love yes, but an unconditional love? I am afraid not. It was built on years and years of doing things and being there for each other (and their family).

God's love for us has absolutely nothing to do with what we can do (or did do) for Him. Because we cannot accomplish anything on our own, we are here (this earth) to learn and appreciate the fact that we are totally dependent on Him, totally.

His Peace to you,

Joe

 
 

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